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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Screenwriting Discussion    The 2018 Writers' Tournament  ›  Fleshy Things - WT Moderators: Mr. Blonde
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  Author    Fleshy Things - WT  (currently 1640 views)
khamanna
Posted: March 21st, 2018, 4:24am Report to Moderator
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Sorry this doesn't work for me. As it reads - it's just a pointless zombie script.
And it's not an action script either in my opinion.

Let's see what your competition is about though.
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PrussianMosby
Posted: March 22nd, 2018, 3:34am Report to Moderator
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Fleshy Things

Short notes: This all builds up on comedy. Then eventually it makes a turn into the genre. There's few balance yet, probably too many main characters as well.

story (0-5): 2

character (0-5): 2

presentation (0-5): 3

total: 7



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MarkItZero
Posted: March 23rd, 2018, 10:43am Report to Moderator
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Thanks all for the notes.

I think it needed more zombie sex!!


That rug really tied the room together.
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SAC
Posted: March 23rd, 2018, 10:54am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


… but some dreams do

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Damn, bro. This was my favorite. I got my hands full with you.


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DustinBowcot
Posted: March 23rd, 2018, 10:57am Report to Moderator
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Quoted from MarkItZero
Thanks all for the notes.

I think it needed more zombie sex!!


Didn't you write a similar story once, set in a bathroom? Similar circumstances, where there was a sudden change into a monster of some type?
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MarkItZero
Posted: March 23rd, 2018, 11:06am Report to Moderator
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Quoted from DustinBowcot


Didn't you write a similar story once, set in a bathroom? Similar circumstances, where there was a sudden change into a monster of some type?


You mean my butt alien script? No one understood the genius of that script either! Actually, I believe it was Steven Clark who recognized the brilliance of the butt alien monster and now zombie sex. He's a very wise man.


That rug really tied the room together.
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SAC
Posted: March 23rd, 2018, 11:54am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


… but some dreams do

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The butt alien script is classic!


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