I just finished reading it and here's what i thought.
1. Good plot and Good Format.
2. instead of Graphic Appears you could use Tile Card or Screen Overview.
3. Some basic errors that need to be corrected e.g Preston says " I told Rebecca i wasn't going to be late tonight....but not this late" it doesnt make sense to me, should it say " I told Rebecca i was going to be late tonight....but not this late."
Page 21 you have " Petal " instead of " Pedal ". Page 85 " Ryan walks back to Ryan "
4. The first three times Ryan is seen you introduce him as " Ryan, Zoe's Father "
We already know who he is, you don't need the father part.
5. When Preston let's Lex escape it seems to easy the way Lex talks him round.
6. Later when Preston and Lex meet back up they don't remember each other until the next couple of pages, Preston was written as a by the book cop and i think he would remember the guy who he let go as it is the only time he has went against the book in his entire career.
7. Preston breaks down and then is hugged by Lex. Lex is supossed to be this street wise criminal, i'm sorry but i don't see him giving Preston a hug. Maybe he could give him an uncomfortable pat on the shoulder or something like that.
8. What happens to Lex? The last we see of Lex is in the warehouse when Trevor grabs the gun from him?
9. Preston is meant to have a dodgy leg but is running quite normally in the warehouse.
10. At the end at the bus stop you write " Preston is standing off to one side as everyone waits " then a few lines later you write " A large Passenger van pulls up next to the curb and the door opens. Preston is driving. " How can Preston be standing and driving at the same time?
I don't mean to sound harsh, but these are some of the things i noticed and thought i should comment on. I hope these points help you with rewrites.
Good luck with future writing