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Well, I'm sorry but I haven't the faintest clue what your story is about. Perhaps it would have been a good idea to have a log line to give the reader some idea going in. There are also quite a few formatting and grammatical errors. Needs a good deal of work.
Thanks! Let's see what happens with it. The fact that they asked me for advice makes me think they're new at this, but we all have to start somewhere.
Kirsten, I can see that about sci-fi. Hard to know where to draw the line between explaining enough and explaining too much. Thinking about Alien for example, we don't get a full explanation of how the world works in that film. We get enough to satisfy our need to know, but basically nothing about the nuts and bolts of the workings.
If it is clear and the reader doesn't get it, they're not worthy of having a job in the first place. All this bullshit that prevails is mostly due to writers making up excuses for why their work didn't sell.
Your instincts will usually be correct. Writers here will claim confusion just because you do something different to them even if they actually get it. Writing around ugly format is surely always preferable. The reader doesn't need to instantly get it. So long as they get it soon after, then it's all good... and some will even enjoy the fact that you're allowing them to think for themselves.
If in doubt, use the camera direction. If you're confident, then write how you want.
I have decided not to use flashback because the next scene makes it perfectly obvious. He snaps out of a daze)
Dave, as far as what trottier says - i think heís great at formatting but poor at his story telling lessons. I.E in my story that first scene is necessary for the next (protagonist agrument with his wife. This happens in many movies.
As for it is slug - Iím assuming you guys like me have read scripts and studied the graft.
Everywhere I read - said either (BEGIN FLASHBACK) or in slug is acceptable -(as are a number of other methods - see trottierís bible) i use the first example if the flashback occurs within a scene and the second if itís a scene until itself.
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Thanks for the interview - After reading it I signed up and uploaded some scripts.
Any site that will let me host for free is fine in my book.
Only having a couple of issues with the site so far - uploaded 5 scripts and each one had my name as the script title (some of them are my fault as I sometimes use a JPG with my title on the title page). I can edit the listing though, so not too bad.
Can't seem to delete any of them - keep getting an error message.
My scripts don't appear to be visible to the public - Don't know how to change that, or if I can - what's the point in hosting it if no one can see it?
Other than that, don't see the harm in having another place to host some scripts for free.
This was ok. I read the script when it was on the blacklist, I liked Boy and Hunt for the Wilderpeople. What We Do in the Shadows is his best so far I reckon.
The shift between humour and pathos jarred for me at times and I was never fully sold on it. In the end, I didn't find it funny or powerful enough, it fell between two stools. While the ending is just too much of the latter, mawkish.
I don't have an issue with the premise of the film (making light of Nazism and its leader). Given enough time, anything can qualify as material for comedy. Thus, all the controversy about it felt way overblown. That to me was the biggest surprise, it's pretty weak sauce on a satirical level and didn't justify all the sanctimonious hand wrin...
What readers are being talked about here? If you're paying for coverage then the readers will read every slug. If a producer is interested in your work then they too will read every slug. If you're talking about an OWC and half the writers here, then who gives a toss whether they read every slug or not?
You don't actually need to specify FLASHBACK in your scripts if it is clear what is going on. You can tell me I'm wrong as much as you like, it still doesn't make you right.