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Search Results - Recent posts as of less than a minute ago
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Showing 1 - 30 (14523 results found)
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Bunnies   (reply) Posted by: Kevin_S
Date Posted: 38 minutes ago
Hey Ben!

I gave this a read.   It comes across  more of a how the incest case affected more than just the kids. Not just David trying to find Daisy. Which is fine for sub plots, but most of the script is the sub plots.

The setup....I would lose the mugshot of Dauphin and the Narrator.   The scene of abuse. I would reconsider. That would be a tough scene to watch.  I get you want  show the hell they endured, but that part of the story I would use more implicating tactics.  Such as they play like normal kids in the yard.  Then Dauphin hollers from the balcony it's time to come hang out with the adults. They go from happiness to dread.  Then &nb...

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Goals for 2019   (reply) Posted by: MarkItZero
Date Posted: Yesterday, 2:14pm
Finished the first one on my list awhile back. Then I changed the other goals around a bit (is that cheating?). I came up with ideas for two scripts that I'm really excited about. Simple ideas. So I dove right in to the outlining and studying horror films for one of them. Next year I'm gonna hit the ground running and write them both start of finish.

Here's the goals for remainder of this year:

Study a ton of horror/thriller films. Status: in progress...

Outline new comedy feature. Status: finished!

Outline new horror feature. Status: in progress...

Finish action/adventure script by the end of the year, no matter what, no excuses. Status: ARGH!
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Goals for 2019   (reply) Posted by: RolandJ
Date Posted: Yesterday, 11:51am
Enter 4 short contests.
Complete feature script.
Continue working on format.  
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Goals for 2019   (reply) Posted by: Dustin
Date Posted: Yesterday, 8:03am

Quoted from eldave1


Congrats - making a living off of writing is a hell of an achievement


Cheers, mate.
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Bunnies   (reply) Posted by: AlsoBen
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 9:34pm
Thanks Don. Sorry I never saw this go up.

Willing to give someone else a read in exchange for feedback, as I know this is a big read.

Have a great weekend
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Goals for 2019   (reply) Posted by: hawkeye
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 6:20pm
Good to see people getting some stuff done.  And Dena, knowing you, you could bust out 4 screenplays by the end of this weekend!  
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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Night_Writer
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 5:40pm
Yes!  There is so much here that will help me in the rewrite.  Words cannot express my gratitude!


Quoted from Matthew Taylor
I'm not trying to tell you how to write, or how to tell your story - below is just my opinion so take what you agree with, disgard the rest.


I know.  No explanation necessary.  Nobody's skill set ever improved from having smoke blown up their ass.  Criticize away...



Quoted from Matthew Taylor
There's a lot of unfilmables in here


Yes.  I was aware of that as I was writing.  I cheated, especially toward the end.  That was me throwing the rulebook to the wind.  I'll own that one.


Quoted from Matthew Taylor
I learnt this
...

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Yesterday   (reply) Posted by: eldave1
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 5:26pm
This is on my list - will check back after I get a chance to see it
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Goals for 2019   (reply) Posted by: Warren
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 5:04pm
So far so good on my goals, have been updating it as I go.
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Goals for 2019   (reply) Posted by: eldave1
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 5:02pm
Complete two features. Complete Two Shorts.

Done and Done. Completed two features this year.

- Get two scripts reviewed on Amateur Friday.


No luck - but tried.

- Complete 50 queries.


Have done zero - got to get on this.

- Enter four contests.

Done

- Read at least twelve features.


Done

- Write a script where every line ends in an orphan

There is still time to get this
done
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Goals for 2019   (reply) Posted by: eldave1
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 5:00pm

Quoted from Dustin
I have too many freelance jobs going at the moment to write anything for myself. Putting in 10 hours on most days. I suppose my biggest goal has always been to make a living from writing which I have achieved. However, I don't feel freelance has enough security. The work doesn't last forever. Even though I've been with this one Chinese company for a year now... the work's probably going to run out one day. I stopped working for the animation company recently because there are only so many scripts you can write for 3-5-year olds before your head explodes. I've got a nice corporate gig now too that involves me needing to know everything about a highly specialised business in 24-48 hours and then write a video script. It's
...

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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Matthew Taylor
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 4:58pm
Alright, here we go.

I'm not trying to tell you how to write, or how to tell your story - below is just my opinion so take what you agree with, disgard the rest.

I'm actually glad I read this - You got a nice emotive story here. Strong subject matter about how an event like this affects so many people, not only in the immediate aftermath, but decades later.
I don't think the subject matter will set you back (I know you have fears of that) - but it is relateable and current - a good director should easily see it's commercial value.

FYI - the below may seem overly negative, but that's only because I am concentrating on the things i think can be improved - overall, the writing was decent and I enjoyed the story (Side no...

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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Night_Writer
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 4:55pm

Quoted from Dustin
Matthew's point isn't about depicting a sympathetic view of the shooter. He's suggesting that you make the characters more real rather than cardboard cut-outs or heavily cliched characters. People do evil things, doesn't mean they do evil things all the time. Some serial killers have happy family lives. Make great neighbours. The only time one sees their bad side is if they're unfortunate enough to be a victim. Otherwise, they're great people.


Yep.  I get that.  Agreed.


Quoted from Dustin
In fact, some of the nicest people I've ever met have been murderers.


I've got a couple on retainer.  
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Goals for 2019   (reply) Posted by: pale yellow
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 4:46pm
Well it's a good time... now that half the year is over with! If I'd have stuck to my goal I'd have four finished features right now! Instead I've finished ONE and started a second and third one. I did option two things.. one pitch and one feature... but no money yet on them. So if it were not for my good husband I'd be a bag lady by now. haha

Need to pull up my bootstraps and push on though. Can still have four more by December if I stick to my writing goals! I'm going to try to do it!! Thanks for re-upping this threat... needed it!!
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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Dustin
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 4:45pm
In fact, some of the nicest people I've ever met have been murderers.
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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Dustin
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 4:44pm
Matthew's point isn't about depicting a sympathetic view of the shooter. He's suggesting that you make the characters more real rather than cardboard cut-outs or heavily cliched characters. People do evil things, doesn't mean they do evil things all the time. Some serial killers have happy family lives. Make great neighbours. The only time one sees their bad side is if they're unfortunate enough to be a victim. Otherwise, they're great people.
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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Night_Writer
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 4:20pm

Quoted from Matthew Taylor


That's cool - world would be a dull place if we all just agreed all the time lol


Dull indeed!  And in theory, I agree 100% with what you posted.  Absolutely.  It's just that, for me, the subject of school violence is something I want to handle with a delicate touch.

Impressionability.  Maybe that's it.  Maybe's that's my hangup.  I mean, if the average person watches a show about a notorious serial killer, seems unlikely they'd be influenced to kill.  If a troubled teenager sees a movie that depicts a sympathetic view of a school shooter... I dunno.  I worry about sh*t like that.

But in any event, I'm 100% beh...

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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Matthew Taylor
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 4:02pm

Quoted from Night_Writer


I get your point, but I stand behind what I posted.

That said, I greatly appreciate you taking the time to read and review.

Mike




That's cool - world would be a dull place if we all just agreed all the time lol
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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Night_Writer
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 3:49pm

Quoted from Matthew Taylor
hmmm - feel like you are miss understanding me, and hanging on the superhero thing too much.


Well, you have to remember that when I wrote the above post, I thought you still hadn’t read the script and that you were still approaching the subject matter from a different perspective.

I get your point, but I stand behind what I posted.

That said, I greatly appreciate you taking the time to read and review.

Mike




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Goals for 2019   (reply) Posted by: Dustin
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 3:46pm
I have too many freelance jobs going at the moment to write anything for myself. Putting in 10 hours on most days. I suppose my biggest goal has always been to make a living from writing which I have achieved. However, I don't feel freelance has enough security. The work doesn't last forever. Even though I've been with this one Chinese company for a year now... the work's probably going to run out one day. I stopped working for the animation company recently because there are only so many scripts you can write for 3-5-year olds before your head explodes. I've got a nice corporate gig now too that involves me needing to know everything about a highly specialised business in 24-48 hours and then write a video script. It's a bit like an OWC on...

Click here to read more ...
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New Opportunities - 18/07/2019   (reply) Posted by: AnthonyCawood
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 3:39pm
My pleasure!
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Yesterday Posted by: hawkeye
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 3:21pm
Saw this with the missus last night and it was just okay for me. The idea was fairly solid but they sort of slopped it up with some pretty bad plot holes.  The acting is okay and I’m glad that the guy they used actually did his own singing (he just wasn’t great at it, and so I can’t imagine any recording studio wanting to take him on).

It’s one of those “feel good” movies that really just leaves one unmoved by the story, in my opinion. I think the best thing I can say about it is that it wasn’t another bleeding superhero movie and tried to do something different.

On another note, one of the previews I saw actually got me excited about an indie film: the Peanut Butter Falcon”. Go find the trailer and see what you th...

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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Matthew Taylor
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 3:10pm
hmmm - feel like you are miss understanding me, and hanging on the superhero thing too much.

Point is - the best characters are multi-layered with feelings, motivations, hopes, fears blah blah blah - even the bad ones, the terrorists, murderers, school shooters. I didn't say create sympathy towards them- no one feels sympathetic to a school shooter - just don't be affraid to show their human side (no matter how flawed) think Ted Bundy in "Extremely wicked" or Hitler in "Downfall".... that's all I was trying to say in my long winded and unclear way lol

Anyway, I'm detracting the thread from the script as this point is not relevant to the story.

Just putting my kid to bed, then I'll try and decipher m...

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Goals for 2019   (reply) Posted by: hawkeye
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 3:08pm
So we’re halfway through the year — how’s everyone coming on their goals for the year?  I’ve updated mine up earlier in the thread, but I’ve gotten three of the five accomplished. Those last two are gonna sink me though unless I get a move on.
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Scriptapalooza - 2019   (reply) Posted by: Dustin
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 3:02pm
I was thinking a flesh coloured condom may be better than the balloon. Otherwise they might think he's ill or something and try to take his temperature.
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Scriptapalooza - 2019   (reply) Posted by: PKCardinal
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 12:28pm

Quoted from Dustin


Just tell them you're going to sleep for a few days and put your suitcase in the bed. Maybe add a balloon with a smilie face on it. They'll never know.


There is absolutely no way this doesn't work.
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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Night_Writer
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 12:13pm

Quoted from Matthew Taylor
Ok I read it

1) This movie is not about Jason, not in the slightest lol so who gives a rats ass about his motivations - makes my examples look stupid because both of those were main characters (will teach me to comment before reading the script). But...
2) you give us enough of his motives and mindset before the shooting anyway, through the interview with his mother - most importantly, you give us Stanley's perceived motives, which is important to this story (The fact he blames himself)

To be honest, I would go the opposite way and instead of giving us more about Jason, I would give us less - he gets too much attention in a story that is not about him - I would keep flashbacks, but instead, I would show them fro
...

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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Matthew Taylor
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 11:24am
Ok I read it

1) This movie is not about Jason, not in the slightest lol so who gives a rats ass about his motivations - makes my examples look stupid because both of those were main characters (will teach me to comment before reading the script). But...
2) you give us enough of his motives and mindset before the shooting anyway, through the interview with his mother - most importantly, you give us Stanley's perceived motives, which is important to this story (The fact he blames himself)

To be honest, I would go the opposite way and instead of giving us more about Jason, I would give us less - he gets too much attention in a story that is not about him - I would keep flashbacks, but instead, I would show them from the victim...

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Scriptapalooza - 2019   (reply) Posted by: Dustin
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 11:01am

Quoted from MarkRenshaw



I wish I could as it is supposed to be spectacular. Unfortunately, I'm on vacation in Florida when it is on. Do you think the family would notice if I skipped out for a few days? I'm sorely tempted lol.


Just tell them you're going to sleep for a few days and put your suitcase in the bed. Maybe add a balloon with a smilie face on it. They'll never know.
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The Rising   (reply) Posted by: Matthew Taylor
Date Posted: July 19th, 2019, 8:56am

Quoted from LC
I'm inclined to agree that not everything needs to be or should necessarily be explained.

Seen this one?

We Need To Talk About Kevin
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1242460/
Based on the novel by Lionel Shriver.

Really heavy film...
The good news is that films like this do get made.

Nature/nurture, bad seed/ innate evil. Does the motive always matter?
The story is primarily about the fallout isn't it?


Granted, I haven't seen 'We Need to Talk About Kevin' since it came out, but isn't the theme of that movie all about motive? Not so much the answer, but definitely the question - Why? a moment of bad parenting?  a sense of being unloved as a child? or, unalterably evi...

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