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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Comedy Scripts  ›  Summertime Moderators: bert
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  Author    Summertime  (currently 2275 views)
Don
Posted: September 5th, 2005, 4:43pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Summertime by Mike Addiego - Comedy - A lazy counselor tries to win back his girl and his camp from the evil clutches of an obnoxious golfer.  American Pie in a campground - all one location, great ensemble of characters. - rtf, format


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Balt
Posted: September 21st, 2005, 6:48pm Report to Moderator
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You got Jerdol to think for this review and me reading your screenplay... His thread about how nobody reads comedy and even less review it got me thinking... They don't! They'd rather read a rough fan fic script about freddy fighting a mail man or Jason vs Megoladon. It's absurd and a parody and comedy in its self...

So... I went down the line of comedies and have several I'm going to read that jumped out at me or caught my eager eye. This was the 1st and I've already gotten well into it. I'll give you my full on review when done.

So far I gotta say... It's making me want to read more comedies... I've laughed several times on this one and that is hard to do when reading a script, cause you've gotta be able to visualize it too.

I encourage others to check this one out as so far it's very funny... Easily eclipses any comedy I've seen from Hollywood... I think WEDDING CRASHERS was funny, but not like this... and before Wedding Crashers... LOL! Try and find me a funny comedy... try!

Balt~
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Pete B. Lane
Posted: September 21st, 2005, 8:52pm Report to Moderator
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I also took notice of the "nobody reviews comedies" thread, and decided to do something about it. Before I read it though - is this Mike Addiego on the board to see the review? If not, why bother?
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Balt
Posted: September 26th, 2005, 1:01am Report to Moderator
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Alright... I don't know if you're on the site still or not but here goes... I'm gonna say if you're not on this site you're probably doing stand up somewhere or getting this movie sold, cause this is without a doubt the BEST screenplay on this site!  Bar ****ing none!

You have had me glued to this thing since I started reading it... the bad, I've become very pressed for time and had to read it in moderation... however, I went back and read thru it all in one sitting, cause it was so brilliant!

I don't praise many screenplays, if you know me, you know this. I'm rather strict on reviews and point out the flaws over the good stuff "by & large" With this screenplay... I simply have not thought of one bad thing in it.

It's a riot!
It's laugh out loud funny!
It's the best comedy I've ever read... and if this were made it would rank up there with my favorite comedies such as -- WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER, RUN RONNIE RUN, BLAZING SADDLES, AIRPLANE, PORKEYS and NAPOLEON DYNAMITE.

This movie you've crafted is memorable on so many levels. You have such great characters. Such real characters from Steve, the ultra collective center piece to Nicky no nuts, who just seems to be int he background... LYNX is great!

I can't tell you how many times I cracked up while reading this thing.

Everything about this script is memorable to me. It reminds me alot of WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER with a little bit of EARNEST GOES TO CAMP, a lot of PORKEYS and just a bunch of your own personal experiences thrown in the mix.

I do have a few points of interest I'd like to bring up though... When the deed was bought and given to LYNX, DOON and STEVE sneak in and hide... in a funny ass scene where they get pelted in the nuts by golf balls... Love this scene, however, I think the father and LYNX turned on eachother too quick. I'd bleed it out a few more scenes. You have it to almost where LYNX is ready to give up the deed to these guys.

STEVE does a complete 360 in character about mid way... While this shows he's evolved it also kinda hinders his comedy thru out the rest of the movie.

I love your quips in this. You are sharp as a thumb tack when it comes to writing man, you really are.

I love the indian scene. CLASSIC! Where they go consult the indians and they exchange the fact they won't be getting their land back. FUCKING HELL this movie needs to be made!!!!!!

Loved HOWIE, though not in it as much as I wanted... he had the classic, vulgar, and often to the point... "I'm GONNA FUCK YOUR GIRLFRIEND" line... too funny!

I love towrds the end when STEVE and LYNX are doing the course... STEVE's is nice and great at 1st and then it turns to shit. LYNX had chipmunks and birds churping... LMFAO!

In the end... you wrap it up beautifully. It's got an ending, I'd want to see... unlike most movies out there of this kind.  I love how you made everyone part ways... Veronica got fat again. Steve plays games and smokes pot... everything he didn't wanna do when he got older... but they still stuck together.

WOW!

I already said it once... but I'm saying this again... EVERYONE READ THIS SCRIPT!!!!!!! It's a work of sheer, comedy, genuis.

5 out of mother F'n 5: The best script on this site. Bar fuggin' none! I'm a horror guy. Love my horror and really only write horror... you've pulled me in with this one and never let go. This is a marketable piece of work and one I'd pay to see in the theater. Why this can't be made, but American Pie whatever is and all these other shallow comedies... is beyond me.

Again, everyone, check this out.
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Pete B. Lane
Posted: September 26th, 2005, 2:21am Report to Moderator
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Criminy, Balt! That's the most over-the-top, ass-kissing review I've ever read.

I started to read Summertime, and stopped after the first scene. The whole "horny guys sneaking into the girl's showers" bit has been done a hundred times. That alone makes this script not as "brilliant" as you claim it to be. It does appear to be well-written, and maybe it is funny, but a work of "sheer comedy genius"? C'mon. The "best script on the site"? Please.

Are you Mike Addegio?

Anyway, as I said, unless Mike shows up, I won't be reading read this.

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Pete B. Lane  -  September 26th, 2005, 2:22am
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Balt
Posted: September 26th, 2005, 7:29am Report to Moderator
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It's not ass kissin' believe me. I don't kiss much ass around here... This script was hands down the best script "THAT I'VE " read on this site. It easily was. The format is good. The content is great. The characters are memorable. The situation comedy is good... I simply cannot say too much bad about this script. I really can't and believe me if I could... you bet your ass I would've made the guy know about it.

I call'em like I see'em... If you got a bad script, you gotta bad script... I'll tell you how to make it better or how I would maybe make it better. If you got a good script, I'll admit that it's better than anything I've got and thus... this script was that script.

I believe it's more of testement because I usually only read and review horror anymore... I've read every Western script here, but by & large Horror, shorts, Thrillers are what I'm into... This script will make you wanna read more comedy.
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bert
Posted: September 26th, 2005, 4:06pm Report to Moderator
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Now Balt is pretty good about supporting his opinion -- whatever it might be -- and of course he ain't Mike Addiego (I mean, come on...), but I gotta say that I am in Pete's corner on this one.

I mean, our opening scene is guys sniffing panties (ugh...who really does this?), and it turns out...surprise!...they belong to the ugly girl and not the hot girl!

We are not exactly forging new frontiers in comedy here, Balt...

But, yeah...if Mike shows up I might give the rest of this story a shot, too.


Hey, it's my tiny, little IMDb!
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Balt
Posted: September 26th, 2005, 4:09pm Report to Moderator
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The opening is just a flash back... It's not the way I'd have started it... but get past that and you will see some clever, clever stuff in this one.
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