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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Drama Scripts  ›  I Am Not Your Girl (was Silent Maids' Rebellion) Moderators: bert
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  Author    I Am Not Your Girl (was Silent Maids' Rebellion)  (currently 4174 views)
TheRichcraft
Posted: June 26th, 2010, 4:51pm Report to Moderator
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This is Martin Luthor King's "I Have a Nightmare" speech.  I couldn't tell if this was written by a Black Panther or a Klansman.  Either way, I gave up after ten pages.

Ethnic defect in speech?  Oh, brother.  That told me what I getting myself in for.
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coldbug
Posted: June 26th, 2010, 9:21pm Report to Moderator
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Before I read any scripts on here (if the log line catches me), I usually try to see the comments posted.  Positive or Negative.  If i see many negatives, and not even one positive, I don't waste a second to open the file to read it.  Anyhow, here are my thoughts.

Hmmm... a script to show about prejudice?  Very interesting..very risky....and very thoughtful.

Interesting is because I fell in love with the movie "Crash" because of a couple of scenes when Matt Dillon as a white cop embarrassing the black woman.  Not only the racial part was described, but also the religious sarcasm was executed perfectly. If you guys forgot, try to watch that scene again.  

So, i love to see if any other writer can do the same...that was interesting right? Not if a writer is aiming to hit the target, and misses a mile wide.

Risky is because the screenwriter is messing with the Teeth of a Tiger.  I have Tom Clancy's book called Teeth of a Tiger in front of me.  Tom said "If you want to kick the tiger in the ass, you better have a plan how to handle with his teeth."

Thoughtful:

It's a nice idea to show the people about racism, but it's a bad idea if you have not collaborated quite good enough.  

I think you're showing the individual racism.  Don't do that if so.

Rewrite it...change the plot....try to focus on cultural racism rather than individually... what i meant was..try not to write about one person's point of view.  Racism is not from one person.  It's an unacceptable cultural belief, and threat to a SOCIETY.  Not on one man or one woman.

A person's behavior is only about his/her journey of life and beliefs.  A group's behavior is called Diffusion of Responsibility when they fail to respond with such a manly manner.  

To conclude,  if you're gonna do a big thing (racism scripts are often rejected by production companies unless you nailed it), you must STUDY, and learn bigly.

Good luck!  









A lie has traveled around the world while the truth is putting the shoes on.
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coldbug
Posted: June 26th, 2010, 9:31pm Report to Moderator
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If you all thinking Matt Dillon was a racist in that movie, and it was an individual racism.  You all are correct, but recollect your mind.

Remember he was a cop.  There're many cops around the world just like him.  That's what the screenwriter is trying to tell you.  It's not really about him, in fact, Matt represents all the racist cops on Earth.



A lie has traveled around the world while the truth is putting the shoes on.
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