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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Screenwriting Discussion    Contests - Screenwriting and Filmmaking  ›  Free 1 Page or Less Contest Moderators: Don
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  Author    Free 1 Page or Less Contest  (currently 3539 views)
mcornetto
Posted: May 16th, 2007, 3:10am Report to Moderator
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Hey! That was pretty good.  Reminded me of a graphic novel for some reason. Don't know why?

Here's mine anyway.  I went for a drama too.




               EXT. BEACH - DAY

               GRANDPA sits on the sand. He is building a sand castle.
               Young TOMMY groans as he sets down a bucket of water
               nearby.  

                                   TOMMY
                         Why couldn't we build it closer
                         to the water, Grandpa?

                                   GRANDPA
                         Because it has to be far enough
                         away. From the tide.  The further
                         away from the water it is the
                         longer the castle will stand.

                                   TOMMY
                         It isn't going to last forever?

                                   GRANDPA
                         Nothing lasts forever Tommy.

                                   TOMMY
                             (hugs Grandpa)
                         I bet you will.

                                   GRANDPA
                             (chuckles)
                         I certainly hope so.
                             (hugs Tommy)
                         Let's finish this before the
                             (ominous)
                         Tide turns.

               He tickles Tommy. Tommy shrieks then pushes himself away.
               Grandpa wriggles his finger at Tommy.  Tommy runs away
               toward the water's edge, smiling as he screams.  

               Grandpa chuckles. He shakes his head as he stands. He
               hobbles off after Tommy, unintentionally knocking over the
               bucket of water in the process. The water floods the
               castle's side, eroding the wall it touches.

               Grandpa nears Tommy. He wriggles his fingers again.  Tommy
               shrieks and laughs.  A wave's wake washes against Grandpa's
               leg.  He stumbles but he continues his journey toward
               Tommy.  

               Tommy hops up and down, happy, excited, looking for the
               next direction to run.  Grandpa is quite close now. Another
               wave's wake washes against his leg.

               Grandpa stops. Alarmed.

               Tommy quiets, concerned as he watches Grandpa fall to the
               ground. He hurries to Grandpa's side. He kneels next to
               Grandpa and shakes him. Tommy cries. Another wave's wake
               washes against them.
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Shelton
Posted: May 16th, 2007, 3:24am Report to Moderator
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All good entries so far, but I think we all managed to make them quite visual, which would probably be weird in a live reading.  Can't expect to squeeze to much dialogue into a 1 pager though, I'd imagine.

Here's my other one.

SUBTERFUGE

INT. EMERGENCY ROOM - NIGHT

PHIL, early forties, enters through the automatic doors
holding a red stained towel over his right forearm.
He takes a seat in one of the waiting room chairs next to a
YOUNG WOMAN, early twenties. He looks over to her and nods.

PHIL
Hi, Iím Phil. Whatís your name?

The young woman does nothing but stare at Philís bloody
towel. Phil looks down at the towel, then back to the
woman.

PHIL
Just a little scratch. Nothing to
be alarmed about. What are you in
for?

Phil lightly chuckles as a NURSE, early thirties, rushes
over to him.

NURSE
Sir, I think we need to get you in
right away.

PHIL
No, Iím fine really. Itís just a
flesh wound. I can wait.

NURSE
Sir, please. At least let me look
at it.

The nurse attempts to remove the towel, but Phil moves his
arm around, evading her advances.

They struggle back and forth, swinging their arms, grabbing,
and evading.

The towel falls from Philís arm, revealing a small tube with
a bag of red dye attached to it. They both freeze, staring
into each otherís eyes. The nurseís mouth wide open in
shock.

Phil lowers his head, still maintaining eye contact with the
nurse.

PHIL
Iím so lonely.


Shelton's Website

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"I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper." - Steve Martin
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mcornetto
Posted: May 16th, 2007, 3:58am Report to Moderator
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That was quite good, Mike. I didn't know whether to laugh at or feel pity for the poor guy.  I did end up laughing but I felt really guilty about it. Very complex.  Nice.

As far as the reading goes, I would imagine they would have a narrator sort of person reading the actions.
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Helio
Posted: May 16th, 2007, 9:12am Report to Moderator
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Better to die with vodka than with tedium!

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I did too.
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BrandNew
Posted: May 16th, 2007, 2:41pm Report to Moderator
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Damn, yours are all so much better than mine, but I'll post it anyway.  There's probably no way mine will win because it has absolutely no dialogue.

INT. BASEMENT - DAY

JOHN, 16, sits on a couch in his basement.  He holds a lollipop in front of him.
Delicately, John licks the lollipop.

TED, 17, walks in from the hall and stands in front of him.

They stare at each other intensely.

Suddenly, Ted steals the lollipop to John’s surprise.  Ted puts it in his mouth.

John stands up.

Ted smacks John.

Tears stream down John’s face.  He runs off down the hall.

INT. BATHROOM - MOMENTS LATER

John enters the bathroom crying.

He peers into the mirror and observes the red mark left by Ted.

He imagines the lollipop.

I/E. STORE - DAY

MONTAGE SEQUENCE - BUYING A LOLLIPOP

John slams a dollar bill against a store counter.

A lollipop replaces the money.

John shoves the wrapper into his pocket.

The lollipop flies upward into John’s mouth.

John smiles and moans in satisfaction.

END MONTAGE:

INT. BATHROOM

John removes the wrapper from his pocket and shreds it to pieces.

FADE OUT.


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Heretic
Posted: May 16th, 2007, 4:03pm Report to Moderator
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Hey, I think these are all great actually.  Mcornetto, I especially liked yours - a nice powerful moment in one page.

Yeah, perhaps we will all suffer from the lack of dialogue.  I just couldn't really tell a story in one page through dialogue...


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George Willson
Posted: May 17th, 2007, 12:23am Report to Moderator
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These are all pretty decent for one page. Just to put something in perspective, commercials (you know, those little irritating spots that take us away from our favorite shows?) are classically anywhere from 15-60 seconds, and the majority are 30. In 30 seconds, they tell a complete story, and pimp a product. That would be about half to a full page. Think about it.


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Heretic
Posted: May 17th, 2007, 12:41am Report to Moderator
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That's an interesting point, George.  I've been watching a lot of commercials lately, specific ones from good directors like Spike Jonze.  I think it must be a great exercise for a writer and director to have to do so much in so little time.

DoP really gets a workout, too, in creating a look...you know what I find really impressive are those ads where you know what the product is four seconds in because it just "looks" like one of those ads.


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BrandNew
Posted: May 17th, 2007, 4:14pm Report to Moderator
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Hungry for Something Different?

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Yeah, I never even thought to look at it that way which is weird because I love good commercials and I should have made that connection.  Spike Jonze makes excellent commercials, but my favorite is Jonathan Glazer.  Also, David Lynch's PS2 commercials are good.

The only drawback with the commercials relationship is that I've never seen a commercial script.  In a booklet that came with my Jonathan Glazer collection, it just shows him writing out the ideas and scenes just with bullets, but perhaps I'm wrong.

-Pat


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Helio
Posted: May 30th, 2007, 1:39pm Report to Moderator
Old Timer


Better to die with vodka than with tedium!

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The result will be announced on June 1st !

Good look to all that got in!
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dogglebe
Posted: May 30th, 2007, 9:54pm Report to Moderator
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If my Bad Penguin script doesn't win, then I'll know it's fixed!


Phil
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mcornetto
Posted: May 31st, 2007, 6:14am Report to Moderator
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Sorry Phil. The winners have been announced and there isn't a Bad Penguin on the list.  Mine isn't there either. There isn't a single name I recognize in the top twenty.  Good luck next time everybody.
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dogglebe
Posted: May 31st, 2007, 6:28am Report to Moderator
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That's it I've had it!  Everyone, pack your things.  

I'm closing the internet!


Phil
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Helio
Posted: May 31st, 2007, 9:07am Report to Moderator
Old Timer


Better to die with vodka than with tedium!

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Dethan
Posted: May 31st, 2007, 9:35am Report to Moderator
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I'm in the final 20.  BALZAC = the 1 page version of The Biography.

INT. OFFICE - DAY

A pen CLICKS on and off. FRANK sits next to a stack of tabloids on a sofa reading the NATIONAL INQUIRER. He folds the paper into his lap in exasperation.

FRANK
All right.  I'll bite.  What is wrong?

CARL (O.S.)
Writer's block. I can't think of anything to write for my biography. Haven't you ever had writer's block?

FRANK
Never... Fine.  On one occasion.  But it was peculiar. I lost a bet and had to get a tattoo on my scrotum.

CARL sits behind a small desk and chews on his pen for a second.

CARL
So, what did you chose?

FRANK
The first amendment.

CARL
Freedom of speech?

FRANK
Exactly.

CARL
Your lying.

FRANK
Want to bet?

Carl nods. Frank gets up.  Walks around the desk and stands in front of Carl.  His back relaxes and he reaches down and unzips his pants.

CARL
Interesting handwriting font.  Whose is it?

FRANK
Balzac.

--------
I liked the 1 pages posted here more than mine.  Which is why I didn't post it till now... That and I've grown attached to the longer version.  This seems like a shadow of what it has become.

Dethan



Revision History (1 edits)
Dethan  -  May 31st, 2007, 10:27am
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