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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Horror  ›  Zombies in Love
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Owens91 and 2 Guests

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  Author    Zombies in Love  (currently 1377 views)
Don
Posted: January 25th, 2018, 2:24pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Zombies in Love by Fausto Lucignani - Short, Horror, Romance - After two centuries since their deaths, two lesbian zombies meet in a cemetery and fall in love.  5 pages

production: Shoestring production  3 zombies and one location - pdf, format

Writer interested in feedback on this work



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You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
- Wayne Gretzky

Revision History (1 edits)
Don  -  January 25th, 2018, 5:48pm
page count wrong.  
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Warren
Posted: January 25th, 2018, 4:50pm Report to Moderator
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So that just happened... I don't have the words.


To View All My Scripts Please Use The Link Below

My Website

My IMDb
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Don
Posted: January 25th, 2018, 5:52pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Quoted from Warren
So that just happened... I don't have the words.


The words are: "odious liquid" and "dark, coagulated blood" and "awesome".

Somewhere there is a film student sitting on ten gallons of stage blood and zombie makeup that needs to find this script.

Don






Visit SimplyScripts.com for what is new on the site.


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You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
- Wayne Gretzky
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bert
Posted: January 26th, 2018, 2:41pm Report to Moderator
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Buy the ticket, take the ride

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Haha.  My only problem is that I am not getting why this has so much dialogue.


Hey, it's my tiny, little IMDb!
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Heretic
Posted: January 26th, 2018, 3:44pm Report to Moderator
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10/10. Somebody get this in a theatre so I can watch it.


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Warren
Posted: January 26th, 2018, 4:16pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Heretic
10/10. Somebody get this in a theatre so I can watch it.


Really so that's where the bar is. Wow.


To View All My Scripts Please Use The Link Below

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khamanna
Posted: January 26th, 2018, 4:20pm Report to Moderator
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I wish it was a feature!
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Warren
Posted: January 26th, 2018, 4:29pm Report to Moderator
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Actually now that you mention it, why wouldn't I want to watch 90 minutes of two dead humans groaning at each other and being intimate while their rotting bodily fluids leak out of them.

You make a very good point.


To View All My Scripts Please Use The Link Below

My Website

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eldave1
Posted: January 26th, 2018, 6:02pm Report to Moderator
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ugh.Not for me


My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
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James McClung
Posted: January 26th, 2018, 6:57pm Report to Moderator
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Don't wanna say too much here, lest I come off as taking an intentional lark too seriously. I also haven't reviewed anything here in a while, so I don't know if "Writer interested in feedback" has proved a reliable indicator that the writer is indeed around to read it. What I will say is that I agree with Bert. The dialogue's gotta go. I straight up didn't read it.


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Fausto
Posted: February 5th, 2018, 2:43pm Report to Moderator
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First of all, thank you very much for reading my script! You have been very courageous indeed...but, please, let's give the zombies a chance to express their feelings through dialogue. The two women want to spend their deaths together.
My best,
Fausto
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Kirsten
Posted: February 6th, 2018, 7:03am Report to Moderator
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Giving up is not an option....

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Lmao, nice one Fausto... thats the very first lesbian zombie, incredibly soft porn short ive read 😁.  P.s the dialogue is a liitle on the nose....😊


"Turn that off, our friend has just been killed in a fatal sunlight accident!"....

'What we do in the Shadows.'
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Fausto
Posted: February 6th, 2018, 7:57am Report to Moderator
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Hi Kirsten,
thank you for reading this unusual story. Regarding the dialogue, I see your point but please keep in mind that this is the way zombies talk...very simple and repetitive.
Best regards,
Fausto
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Fausto
Posted: February 6th, 2018, 9:13am Report to Moderator
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Khamanna,
thank you for your suggestion...a feature zombie script is not a bad idea...I have to think about an original story.
Thank you for reading.
My best,
Fausto
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Heretic
Posted: February 7th, 2018, 10:46am Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Warren
Really so that's where the bar is. Wow.


I think there's a lot to be said for a simple story told simply. The ladies love each other even in death -- it's a nice idea and it's well-expressed in a visually interesting way. To me it's the same impulse of total sincerity that drives great movies like Before Sunrise or Brawl on Cell Block 99.


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Fausto
Posted: February 7th, 2018, 11:27am Report to Moderator
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Heretic,
you captured perfectly the soul of the story...a simple love story evolving after death...forever. I read the script of Before Sunrise and I saw the movie...fascinating in its simplicity.
Thank you for reading my script.
Best,
Fausto
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Fausto
Posted: February 10th, 2018, 8:19am Report to Moderator
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I would like to thank all the 300+ courageous readers of this unique, ground-breaking script.
All my best to all!
Fausto
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colkurtz8
Posted: March 10th, 2018, 5:12am Report to Moderator
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Fausto

I really hope that’s your real name.

Fetid
- Good choice, love that word.

ZOMBIE
(raucously)
GRAAHGR.

- Does the male zombie not get a name?

Is there any rhyme or reason to the sounds uttered by the characters or did you just mash the keyboard? Doesn’t matter either way, just curious since all the dialogue is unintelligible.

Did I just read the first “woke” zombie script? Not only do you portray same-sex relations in an open non-judgemental way but the male character is completely secondary and doesn’t even get a name!

Why does Giselle get so angry at poor male zombie though when all he seems to be doing is professing his devotion to her? Could she not just respectfully decline? Then again, who knows how these two were treated during their actual 19th century lives if their lesbian relationship was a known thing and what kind of person male zombie was in his lifetime. Alas, we’ll never know.

A funny and rather gruesome piece you have here. It could actually work in a purely visual and visceral way on screen, like a silent film, which it practically is already. I mean really go all out with the liquids and body horror, particularly at the end, which you have done on the page.

Col.


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ScottM
Posted: April 2nd, 2018, 4:59am Report to Moderator
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I didn't enjoy that at all.

Is there a purpose for all the dialogue?

People seem to be liking it for the most part, which I don't understand.

This would be visually disturbing to watch, but not in an entertaining way.

Each to their own I guess.

Good luck with it.


Any thoughts on my work in progress would be appreciated.

The Digger

http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?m-1521688645/s-0/#num2
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kyecooper4
Posted: February 26th, 2019, 9:59am Report to Moderator
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I actually found it quite funny, not sure if that's what you were going for.

Agree with most though didn't care to much for the dialogue.

Definitely an interesting concept though, well done
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kyecooper4
Posted: February 26th, 2019, 10:00am Report to Moderator
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really enjoyed your descriptions aswell.
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