"severed dick to the face classic Zack."

I aim to please.

"As a proof-of-concept for a larger story I think this is really good. Full of gore and spooky cultists."

Thanks for reading, dude. Happy you got a kick out of it.

"Personally I would find a better way for them to be wandering through the woods, the flat tyre seems cliche but that could be what you were going for."

I love horror tropes. They are tried-and-true for a reason. They work. And a flat tire is always relatable. That said, I'm always open to suggestions.

"Not sure how much you are towing the line between comedy and horror, but something like they pulled over to go foraging for magic mushrooms, come across a mushroom called Phallus impudicus (it looks like a dick) and the dude jokes around trying to get Amber to eat it and slaps it in her face (foreshadowing the real dick to the face later )"

I fuckin' LOVE this! Let's see if I can't work that in...

Thanks again, dude!

Due to all the comments, I felt I had to give this a quick glance over.

To be absolutely honest this isn't my sort of thing, since i find this genre juvenile and silly.
However, The writing itself is good and the descriptions, though over-emphasized at times with cliches galore are also really good.

I can't see anything different as to what I would expect to see with this kinda genre, since it's been portrayed over and over, and over again. Nothing new here. "It is what it is."

I know Americans love this sort of thing, so good luck with it and thanks for the opportunity to read.

Thanks for giving the script a look. Sorry it didn't click with you, but at least you found the writing itself to be solid.

This definitely isn't for everyone. Targeting a very specific audience with both this and the feature version. This is for horror fans craving an 80's throwback that doesn't fuckin' suck. More specifically, this was written for 15-year-old me.    

Thanks again for reading.  

Thanks for getting this new draft up. Curious if those who read an earlier draft find this version to be an improvement.

Have some exciting news coming very soon!

Hey Zack,

I remember reading the original Potem feature script and enjoying it, particularly the tongue-in-cheek violence and gore the Potem would inflict on his victims., and that undertone of humour it had, throughout.

I’ve read the POC script, which also has an undertow of humour and of course, the exaggerated Potem aggression, which is great. If you can produce this short to an eye-catching standard, that would be brilliant. It feels like a big job, which I know you know, but we must believe anything is possible. Could set you back a bit though.

Given that, it might be worth drawing up one or two backup POC scripts - of course, looking to deliver the same concept, but without the ‘difficult to film’ onscreen savagery.

Might sound a bit silly but what I mean is - show us Andigis briefly, show us those teeth along with the chattering, Luke and Amber shit themselves… then cut… and we just see the aftermath - their mutilated bodies - whatever comically shocking thing Andigas has done to them could add to his IP/USP.  Rightly or wrongly, I was always pushing for some laugh-out-loud violence with this project. Appreciate mutilated bodies won’t be cheap either but it is probably easier than the onscreen slaughter.  

Loving the introduction of the chattering… don’t remember it in the original.

Just a thought with the Potem’s style of butchery - with Matt mentioning the dick-shaped mushroom thing and Amber possibly being offended by such shapes - this is where Andigis could have a uniqueness to what he does to his victims, as though he’s channelled into their fears, dislikes, what disgusts them, and makes a horrific but funny mockery outta their remains. Just a thought.

Just to reiterate, I think your current POC will do a fine job if you can do it. Will be awesome to see it.

Best of luck!