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The primary purpose of the SimplyScripts Discussion Board is the discussion of unproduced screenplays. If you are a producer or director lookng for your next project, the works here are available for option, purchase or production only if you receive permission from the author.
NOTE: these screenplays are NOT in the public domain and MAY NOT be used or reproduced for any purpose (including eductional purposes) without the expressedwrittenpermission of the author.
Excursion by Aidan Cross - Thriller, Drama - This surreal psychological thriller follows the life of a London businessman whose monotonous lifestyle is disrupted by increasingly strange events until he finds himself forcibly extracted from his regular surroundings and manipulated by terrifying forces beyond his control. 155 pages - pdf format
I�m no format Nazi. But ... if this were formatted properly, it would be over 200 pages i�m Guessing. And there�s a lot of unnecessary description. The whole shower sequence could be cut and much more.
If the writer is looking for feedback - edit edit edit. You�ll find it tough to get reads if you don�t trim it down. Also - i�d Delete the 2014 draft date. People generally want to be reading a new or recently edited thing.
Good luck with it. As it stands I won�t read beyond 5 pages.