Driver nods with a sly grin. American shrugs.
What do I have to lose?
- Oh, famous last words.
Is American not even going to check out the mint condition bus to see what they have to offer? Obviously, that won’t work for the script but you could have a “gone to lunch” sign or something on it which makes American go back to the ramshackle outfit since he has no alternative.
Wow, that multicultural array of passengers really ticks every cliche. All the Japanese man is missing is an over-sized camera dangling from his neck! I’m going to assume that these blatant stereotypes are intentional.
The disdainful tone of the Audio Guide is an amusing touch. I liked passing through the seemingly nice façade of the university to reveal the neglect and decay inside.
These less than complimentary jabs at Romania won’t be getting this a release date in that country if it were ever filmed
Much like Midnight Express in Turkey.
Are these images of the university and victory avenue true? I know it’s had a struggling economy for a long time and was brought to the point of ruin by a despotic communist dictator back in the 80s but are things really that bad? Does Oklahoma, of all places, benefit from it?
I appreciate the Audio Guide’s sentiment in his rant about overthrowing Ceausescu so the ungrateful younger generation could flourish but of course Ceausescu himself was a product of…which generation?
I’m confused as to which side the Driver is on. He’s only 30 and seems to get a kick out of the pedestal-only statues on Victory Avenue yet chuckles when Audio Guide derides the younger generation of which he would be considered part, no?
I love how everywhere looks dead and destitute...except for the red light district.
I’ll admit to getting a laugh from the Oklahoma banner at the theater.
“who holds his up like he just drew Excalibur from the stone.”
- Good prose.
Ha, nice change of direction into the absurd with the zombified younger generation in the prison.
“The bus flies off the fountain, clears the stairs, and lands in the street.”
- It seems foolish to question logic now as the script has gone off the reality chart a couple of pages back upon entering the zombie youth prison but I’m confused by what happens here. Does the bus somehow ramp off the fountain over the staircase? How?
“He then watches with chagrin as the shell-shocked, disheveled, banged-up passengers emerge.”
- Again, I’m confused by the attitude of the Driver. I thought he was getting a kick out of terrifying his passengers but now he’s disappointed with their shell-shocked state as they disembark. Why?
“Driver suppresses a sly grunt/wheeze as he gleefully watches other shell-shocked passengers exit.”
- Now he’s happy again at their distress. What?
- It’s unclear but is this the mint condition one from the beginning?
“The interior of the bonus tour bus is full of cobwebs and a layer of dust.”
- Ha, good gag. I see now why it’s in mint condition.
As you’ll see from my notes, I got some laughs out of this, it get pretty crazy about two thirds through but in a good way or at least in line with the otherwise exaggerated tone of the script. Poor Romania has gotten a roasting in both your scripts. Let’s say you won’t be made an honorary citizen of that country anytime soon
My only concern is that it’s a pretty specific and off-the-beaten-track location which is a hindrance both for practical production reasons and for people to be interested it in enough to read it. You’ll probably find a lot of folk who won’t even know where Romania is, let alone Bucharest. It’s a rather esoteric subject matter that most will find hard to relate to or get invested in. It will serve as a turn off, an excuse to pass on it, you know. Especially since it takes place in a tour bus so there are a lot of historical details and references about the city, both factual and fictional...
Of course, on the contrary, the sheer singular exoticism of it could work in its favour.
“How many scripts have you read about Romania?”
“Well, here is one!”
Either way, I have to give you credit for the research that went in to it and for coming up with a novel and original idea.