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The primary purpose of the SimplyScripts Discussion Board is the discussion of unproduced screenplays. If you are a producer or director lookng for your next project, the works here are available for option, purchase or production only if you receive permission from the author.
NOTE: these screenplays are NOT in the public domain and MAY NOT be used or reproduced for any purpose (including eductional purposes) without the expressedwrittenpermission of the author.
The Monster at Green Creek by Sarah Brims - Short, Thriller - A beautiful girl is found dead at Green Creek. Three students linked to her, are interrogated into the happenings the night of the incident. 30 pages - pdf, format
At 30 pages, this is a long short if that's not an oxymoron. That said, there are some good points. The constant replacement of characters during the interview works fine. But it doesn't lead to a resolution, and it certainly doesn't lead to a satisfactory ending.
You have created a pair of psychopaths, and that's fine, but they get away with double murder, and that isn't a nice, neat ending. In our moral world, they would get their just desserts. But it's your ending, and it certainly leaves the door open to make this a longer piece. With some trim, this could be act 1 of a full-length script.
Otherwise, the writing is fine, the characters are OK. The story is familiar, so there are no problems there.