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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Series  ›  The Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Moderators: bert
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  Author    The Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.  (currently 2519 views)
Don
Posted: June 15th, 2016, 7:48pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. "From Beyond" by Arran McDermott - Series - In this spec script for Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. a mysterious stranger arrives on Earth claiming he is responsible for the recent disappearance of practically every superhero. Coulson and his team not only have to deal with this powerful, godlike threat but an old enemy who has once more seemingly returned from the dead. 66 pages - pdf, format


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Lon
Posted: June 23rd, 2016, 1:42pm Report to Moderator
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I only had time to get through half of this, but I enjoyed what I read.  You have a good grasp of the characters and the kind of humor on display in the show.  I also got a kick out of some of your references.  The Power Pack line gave me a laugh.

The writing itself could use some tightening up, though.  Spelling errors, some action descriptions are a touch clunky.  As for The Beyonder -- I'm only halfway through so I obviously don't know how your whole story turns out, but he's a pretty major character for a single episode.  He's basically his universe's equivalent of God, and the Secret Wars scenario you've suggested may be a bit too big to do justice in a single episode.  After all, the original series ran for twelve issues and introduced some pretty major changes for the MU (at the time, anyway).  Oh, and lose the "previously on" bit at the beginning.  That's done in editing; it's never written into the script.

Those things aside, with a little tightening up, I could see this episode appearing on the show.  
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Arran
Posted: June 29th, 2016, 12:18pm Report to Moderator
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Thanks for the feedback! The idea I had for this was that it would be a tie-in episode if Marvel ever decide to do a Secret Wars movie. So the movie would focus on introducing the Beyonder and showing the heroes and villains fighting, while this would be a "meanwhile, back on Earth" story.
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