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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Drama Scripts  ›  Plunder Moderators: bert
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  Author    Plunder  (currently 910 views)
Don
Posted: August 31st, 2019, 11:49am Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

Location
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Plunder by Doug Pike - Drama - Kup Donovan is driven to find the wreck and treasure of the elusive Estrella Norte--driven enough to provoke his brother's revenge.   96 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work



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PrussianMosby
Posted: September 3rd, 2019, 6:52pm Report to Moderator
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Hey you,
new to the board??

Whatever, I searched for something to read and bought into your title and logline (not completely perfect but draws interest for sure).

so read the first ten for now...

It's good. I like it.

I dig your style and the form you choose that much, that I'm careful to give any advice and keep suggestions to a minimum:

Don't place the copyright sign right behind your author's name.

The first slug is bad. Keep the actual time of day and specific name of places out of the slugline.

P3/4 With descriptions, I'd stop a page with a full sentence.

Otherwise, there's nothing to over think from my view on things here. Very cool performance of you, feels professional.

I'd read on for sure.

All best.



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