Posted by: Colkurtz8 Date Posted: July 31st, 2019, 3:51pm

Matt Quoted from Matthew Taylor Indeed it is. I actually spelled it "ballocks" which I am reliably informed was more common in Victorian England than bollocks - Although, in dialogue, no one would really know the difference. Interesting, I didn't know that. I thought it was accent/inflection detail. Quoted from Matthew Taylor Yea I'm taking liberties with this one lol. The victorian era was one of monsters, both in literature and urban legend. There is an actual urban legend of black swine in Victorian sewers, which was the inspiration for my story - So I'm hoping people will let this slide lol That's true, people would've been a lot more susceptible to believing in monsters back then and easily freaked out. Quoted from Matthew Taylor I have no idea who would play Henry - to be honest, with the sets and costumes involved I doubt it will ever be made, unless it's an animation of some kind. Animation could work but also there is really only a few location ...

Posted by: Matthew Taylor Date Posted: July 31st, 2019, 8:37am

Thanks for the read and comments, col. Much appreciated. I'm glad you enjoyed it. This was a test for me to see how well I could take on board all of the comments from the original version and incorporate into an improved rewrite. Quoted from Colkurtz8 �bullocks� - Is this intentionally misspelled? If so, great! Indeed it is. I actually spelled it "ballocks" which I am reliably informed was more common in Victorian England than bollocks - Although, in dialogue, no one would really know the difference. Quoted from Colkurtz8 NARRATOR (V.O.) Like a Scotsman with the pipes, he blew a melancholy tone, and the snitches peered down with faces of stone. Funny you should pick that one out - That's the one I spent most time on as I didn't like anything I came up with. This line was the best of a bad bunch. I'll step away from this for a week or two and go back in with a fresh mind. Quoted from Colkurtz8 Wo ...

Posted by: Colkurtz8 Date Posted: July 30th, 2019, 12:20pm

Mathew I just read this blindsided without any idea of the logline or the tournament’s criteria. Best to judge it purely on its own merits I think. Good opening, enumerating, with images, the different clichés we associate with Victorian London. “bullocks” - Is this intentionally misspelled? If so, great! Ha, I didn’t notice until the bottom of page two that it’s written in rhyming verse, nice. Regardless of that, I’m a sucker for Victorian literature so I’m enjoying the narrator’s linguistic flourishes. Also, because Henry’s vocation is a unique, disgusting and somewhat absurd one, it stops the piece from feeling too stuffy and serious. NARRATOR (V.O.) Like a Scotsman with the pipes, he blew a melancholy tone, and the snitches peered down with faces of stone. - This is really the only line that creaks in its reaching for a rhyme.  Why expressions of “stone”? I wonder is there a word that rhymes with “confusion”, “surprise” ...

Posted by: DustinBowcot Date Posted: July 17th, 2019, 6:35pm

I was there right from the beginning with Rincewind and the luggage. Ankh Morpork and the university. I'd open the first page of each new book with relish. I read the early books several times and there isn't many authors I can do that with. I sucked in every single word. A genius, a true storyteller. Right up there with the greats. Did you ever read any Tom Sharpe? He was a master too. There'd be a build-up for a hundred pages or so, and then the shit would hit the proverbial... hilarious. Not enough writers of that ilk, unfortunately.

Posted by: DustinBowcot Date Posted: July 17th, 2019, 6:07pm

Quoted from Scar Tissue Films Pratchett is fantastic. I'm very sad he's dead. Great world building, full of great characters and the stories are always gripping, yet he never descends into any nastiness. It's impressive stuff. I'm sad he's dead too. His books carried me through some troubled times.

Posted by: Scar Tissue Films Date Posted: July 17th, 2019, 12:12pm

Pratchett is fantastic. I'm very sad he's dead. Great world building, full of great characters and the stories are always gripping, yet he never descends into any nastiness. It's impressive stuff.

Posted by: DustinBowcot Date Posted: July 16th, 2019, 3:17pm

Quoted from Matthew Taylor I'm not well read to be honest. I'm surprised at that.

Posted by: Matthew Taylor Date Posted: July 16th, 2019, 3:03pm

I am not - I'm not well read to be honest. I did come across the novel though, during my research and read the plot. I got the idea for this after falling down the Wikipedia rabbit role looking up London Victorian sewer system.

Posted by: DustinBowcot Date Posted: July 16th, 2019, 2:41pm

I haven't read Pratchett in years. However, my son does and earlier I happened to glance at the book he is reading. It's entitled, 'Dodger' and is a tosher's tale. You a Pratchett fan?

Posted by: Matthew Taylor Date Posted: June 20th, 2019, 4:02am

Quoted from Scar Tissue Films It would make a good animation, as well. Good idea - I never think about animations to be honest, I should try my hand at a few animated shorts. I read somewhere once not to bother writing an animated feature as no one buys them as specs, they are mostly commissioned - no idea how true that is, but since I read that I have never thought about trying to write one