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DECKHAND JOHN DOE rushes down the dimly lit hallway.
CAPTAIN CORNETTO follows. His jiggling rotund belly and not-quite-grey-bearded face gives the impression of a younger Santa but the anagram lies behind his eyes.
CREW’S QUARTERS
The door opens.
DOE (O.S.) In there sir.
Cornetto stands in the doorway.
The room is a mess, debris-strewn. Dark crimson splatter leads to a message on the wall – written in blood: ONLY ONE SURVIVES.
The remnant of a man lies in the center of the room. A slice neatly down his middle exposes bone, fresh meat. His entrails pop out of that slit like pus from a pimple.
The corner of Cornetto’s lip turns up in a half smile. Then serious.
CORNETTO Who did this, Doe? (no answer) Doe?
LOWER DECK CORRIDOR
Cornetto turns into the hallway.
CORNETTO Doe?
Doe isn’t there. Cornetto smiles as he whispers.
CORNETTO The game is on.
Behind him, down the corridor, a shadow moves. Footsteps. Cornetto turns.
CORNETTO Doe?!
INT. DINING SALOON
An array of fabulous guests finish their meal to the soft but lively sounds of guitar music.
DANA ORANGE, twenty-three years old, short and petite, strums her guitar on a small elevated stage in the corner of the room. Her eyes narrow as she starts in on her special rendition of Copacabana. She taps her foot in rhythm with the music, occasionally revealing a shiny object tucked purposefully inside her boot - perhaps a prop for her big finish?
THUD! The guests look toward the saloon door, the origin of the sound. The music stops.
The doors fly open. Doe staggers in. He’s cut up badly, patches of fresh blood shine irregularly about his body. He scans the room, full of hurt and terror – it’s difficult to talk.
DOE The captain…murder…murder…
And he collapses to the ground.
A flash of light.
NIC BEQIRI, 20's, drops his trusty camera from his face. A twisted smile replaces it, one that seems more crazy than angry or happy.
Then as if appearing magically, COUNTESS ZADORA of Sweden stands next to Doe’s body. She is tall, dressed in black with snow white hair and blue eyes. Blue eyes that frequently change with her mood -- to obsidian black reflecting her true dark nature.
She kneels next to Doe and traces her finger across his bloody cheek. She puts her bloodied finger in her mouth and sucks on it. She smiles.
She gets some strange stares from the other guests as they begin to gather around the body.
One of those guests pushes through the crowd. DR. BERT NEWCOMER (40), the ship's physician, he eyes the passengers with a wry mix of amusement and contempt. His slightly graying hair lends him an air of dignity that some might even consider attractive -- were it not for the smug arrogance that infuses his every word.
NEWCOMER Let me through you idiot! I’m a doctor.
He pushes through the last line of obstacles and stares down at Zadora who kneels next to Doe’s body. Zadora looks up at Newcomer as she pulls her finger slowly out from between her lips. It makes a popping sound as her fingertip leaves her lips.
ZADORA A B negative. Very rare.
Newcomer looks as Zadora strangely as he kneels next to Doe and places his fingers on Doe’s carotid.
NEWCOMER He’s dead.
Murmurs from the crowd. Zadora scrunches her face in an extremely sour expression.
NEWCOMER Did you know him?
Zadora shakes her head, then she sputters, sticks out her tounge.
ZADORA Type O. So common! Another’s blood.
More murmurs. Newcomer is sceptical.
NEWCOMER Don’t tell me…you can taste blood types?
Zadora sticks her chest out proudly. Newcomer stares.
ZADORA My taste buds are very big and very sensitive. Would you like to test them?
Newcomer does a double take.
Flash, Nic takes another photo. Zadora covers her face with a sweep of her arm then runs off. Newcomer looks at Nic, annoyed.
NEWCOMER Do you HAVE to take pictures?
NIC (thinks about it then) Yes.
NEWCOMER Put the camera down and help me carry this body to the medical center.
NIC The medical center? I thought you said he was dead.
NEWCOMER You want to leave him here?
More murmurs from the crowd.
T. JOE stands by the pantry door. He strains under the weight of the plastic tub of dirty dishes he carries. His faded Kill 'Em All t-shirt is stained with sweat under the requisite plastic apron.
T. JOE I’ll help.
Nic sighs with relief. Newcomer eyes T. Joe suspiciously.
T. JOE I’m dressed for it.
T. Joe puts down the tub of dishes and hurries toward the corpse.
NEWCOMER Okay. The rest of you, go to your cabins and stay there.
T. Joe and Newcomer lift Doe’s body and walk toward the exit.
They walk past MISTRESS MORGAN COOPER, who has shapely legs on which she carries herself in an old school "English proper" way which somehow gives her a look of classic innocence even though her life has been anything but that! She looks at her watch...so much about life is about timing. Now is the time.
COOPER Pardon me. (clears her throat) Pardon me! (she has their attention) Where is the captain? I must insist on speaking with the captain!
NEWCOMER He’s not here.
COOPER Where might I find him? This man, the one you’re holding, he said something about the captain being murdered? Is this true?
NEWCOMER I would say that we don’t have enough observational data to decide whether it is true or isn’t.
COOPER (haughty) Right. So where could one observe him then, if one were so inclined?
T. JOE Look lady. This corpse is gonna break my arms.
Cooper looks down her nose at T. JOE, says nothing, just looks.
T. JOE He’s probably driving the ship.
Cooper looks back at Newcomer.
COOPER The bridge then.
Newcomer nods.
COOPER Thank you.
Cooper walks away.
T. JOE (under his breath) B!tch.
COOPER (O.S) I heard that.
T. Joe is not amused but Newcomer laughs as they cart the corpse out the exit.
BUSH (40’s), large, maybe too large, obviously notices Cooper as she walks past him. She gives him a distressed glance and he smiles, very awkward but very planned. And he gets a tentative smile in return. There’s something about his easy going way, his worldly honest eyes, maybe his dilated pupils that attracts them. She’s hooked and now it’s time to reel…
A camera flashes behind him. He spins, fist ready to lash out. But it’s Nic and Nic cowers.
NIC I just needed your picture, man.
Bush lowers his fist.
BUSH Well you got it. Now get out of my face.
NIC Okay
Nic turns away then turns right back.
NIC Hey, you’re that skiing guy, the one with the medals.
BUSH Yeah. That’s me, five gold medals at Sarajevo. You want me to, uh...
Bush mimes signing an autograph with his hands.
NIC No. I’ll remember.
Nic walks away smiling, Bush is confused.
Then Bush remembers. He turns and glances at the spot where he last saw Cooper but she isn’t there.
BUSH Sh!t!
On the other side of the room Zadora watches Bush as he scans the room. Then she watches him exit. Her eyes narrow.
In the foreground, blocking Zadora, Orange walks by, her guitar hanging around her neck. She absentmindedly strums some chords in a way that isn’t quite music. When she passes, Zadora is gone.
Another strum, this one more hopeful, more musical.
ORANGE How about some music? (the crowd assents) Any requests?
CROWD Copacabana.
Orange frowns. She brings down her pick hand and
IN ORANGE’S MIND
She pulls the trigger on her Tommy Gun, a regular gun moll filling the unsuspecting crowd full of lead. She laughs heartily. Each crowd member jiggles while the rat-tat-tatting bullets raise little spouts of blood upon entry to their bodies. A big showy smile then
BACK TO REALITY
Where only her narrowed eyes betray her real intentions. The crowd taps their feet. She plays another chord then…
ORANGE Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl With yellow feathers in her hair and…
The dining table is silent as Orange's rendition of 'Copacabana' plays out.
STE BROWN(20s) sits with an amused smile on his face, studying the stunned faces of his tablemates. He pulls a deck of cards from his jacket pocket and shuffles them with skilled ease.
His gaze rests on GABRIEL M. RIPLEY across the table from him, dressed in a dark suit and his hair tightly jelled back. He looks like a businessman but his stern composure reflects something else.
STE How about a game? You know, just to kill the tension.
The comment breaks the ice on the table as the table seperates into smiles, chuckles and looks of contempt at the very poor choice of phrase.
Gabriel delicately finishes his meal and sits back in his chair. Expressionless and impossible to read. Several beats pass as the two diners exchange a stare.
GABRIEL I don't play...games.
STE Me neither...but suit yourself.
Ste stands up, straightens his jacket out and heads to the bar. The silence returns to the table, only broken briefly by -
STE(O.S) I need a drink!
Gabriel looks around at his fellow passangers at the table. His eyes betray the anger he feels for having his solitude broken.
INT. MAIN SALOON, BAR
PATRICK(SPUD) MURPHY stands behind the bar polishing glasses and watches the first class passangers eat through the double doors. His smart black suit and white shirt give him an air of someone important. To many he in fact would be the most important person on the ship, he is the head barman, he alone holds the keys to the booze store.
Patrick smiles to Ste as he walks in and takes a pew at the bar.
PATRICK (strong Irish accent) What'll it be?
Ste stays silent for a moment, eyes fixed on Patrick.
STE Irish boy, aye? Face looks familiar, what's the name?
PATRICK Murphy, Patrick Murphy but everyone just calls me Spud. Can't say the same...sorry. So, what'll it be?
Ste shuffles his cards, eyes still fixed on Patrick, lays them out on the bartop.
STE Wild Turkey.
Patrick turns to the vast array of bottles that hang on the wall. Picks up a glass.
PATRICK Double?
STE Just give me the bottle and I'll work it out myself.
Patrick turns and smiles, passing the bottle and a shot glass across to him.
Ste pours a shot and knocks it back.
STE Always had a problem with the Irish personnaly.
Pours another shot and knocks that back too.
STE Lost a lot of money on a boxing match a while back, ya see. Guy called 'O'Neill'.
Ste watches for a reaction, there is none. Just a shared steely stare.
PATRICK Can't say I've heard of him.
Ste nods, a knowing smile on his face. He pours himself another shot as -
GABRIEL(O.S) I only play for high stakes.
Ste turns to see Gabriel to his side, he measures him up as Gabriel takes a seat.
GABRIEL Just remember what I said though...I don't play games.
Ste gathers the cards together and gives them another shuffle.
STE (to PATRICK) I think we need another glass, Paddy.
GABRIEL Dealer's choice.
Gabriel drops his hand, stopping a card that flies his way on the bartop.
STE Five card draw. I hope you've got a fat wallet.
Bush spins around, watches as Cooper quickly exits the premises. He starts to exit, takes a step after her, then stops.
ZADORA (O.S.) (whispers) You want me…
Behind him, Zadora’s steely stare is on him…her eyes twinkle in a strange, mesmerizing fashion.
ZADORA (whispers…oddly…lips still) I want you…
As he turns back into the Dining Saloon, she’s suddenly there, in front of him…mouth open…cold…CRUEL…a wide smile. They collide. Bush’s knee goes out, he awkwardly falls forward, and down.
BUSH Shit…not my knee again. God Damnit!
ZADORA (O.S.) (whispers) You’re mine…soon…
He looks up, but the Countess is nowhere to be seen. No one else seems to notice, as music and conversation continues around him. No sign of her…anywhere.
Bush looks around, confused…entranced.
BUSH What the…
He picks himself up, limps over to the bar, where two others are already seated.
STE You OK there, bud?
Gabriel turns as well.
BUSH Yeah…my fucking knee just went out again. That freakin’ blonde bloodsucker chick just appeared in front of me, then she’s gone. Strangest fucking thing I ev…
GABRIEL Well, if it isn’t the illustrative Mr. Bush.
Bush smiles at Gabriel, shoots out a hand.
BUSH Mr. Ripley, I should have known.
They shake hands. Bush sits down, looks to the bartender.
PATRICK We’ve got your Belvedere and Jager on ice, sir. You look like you could use a drink.
BUSH Yeah, or three. Hit me up there with a nice martini, Spud my man. We’ll get to the Jagies a bit later.
Ste shuffles the cards continuously…effortlessly, eyes directly on Bush.
STE You play cards? We were just about to get a game going.
Gabriel eyes him as well, a smirk on his face.
BUSH Oh, I play alright, but I have a feeling this game’s a bit rich for my blood.
He looks over to Gabriel, gives him a wink. Patrick places a beautiful martini on the bar.
PATRICK There you go sir, just the way you like ‘em…dry, with three blue cheese stuff’d olives. I knew you’d be over.
STE You two know each other?
Bush raises his glass.
BUSH Cheers! Yeah, I’ve been to more than a few parties where Spud’s been servin’. A damn good bartender, if I do say so. Cream of the crop.
Gabriel looks to Ste.
GABRIEL Don’t believe a word he says. He’s loaded.
BUSH Right….coming from one of the richest men in the frickin’ world…I’d say it’s very relative.
Ste frowns, downs another Turkey.
STE Another rich, fucking Yank, huh? And on top of that, another rich martini sipping Yank. Where’d your money come from?
GABRIEL I’d say it came from his ex-wives…his dead ex-wives. Isn’t that right, Bush?
Bush sips his martini, eats a loaded olive…a smile on his face.
BUSH Spud, my man, you seriously make the best damn martinis on the planet. Absolute perfection!
Bush frowns over at Ste, as he takes another sip.
BUSH Accidents happen…right? I happened to marry two very…VERY wealthy, and hot as shit women, who happened to die. They left me their fortunes…their BIG fortunes. What can I say? I mean, you if anyone, Ripley, my old friend, can relate to that, right? And you…my new friend…you know what they say about a man and his drink…
STE What’s that supposed to mean?
BUSH Well…Wild Turkey isn’t what I’d call a well educated man’s drink of choice…now is it?
Ste starts to stand…a scowl on his face. He looks pissed.
STE You’re a real arrogant, cocky bastard, aren’t ya?
Bush smiles, takes another sip of his martini.
BUSH Well…I don’t know about arrogant, but yeah, maybe a bit elitist and shit. And you know…you’re right, I guess it’s true, there have been MANY a young lady that’ve said I’ve got quite a nice…
Gabriel stands up abruptly…his chair falls to the ground with a THUD.
GABRIEL Still the same old Bush, huh? Things haven’t changed much, have they?
Bush rubs his rather rotund belly.
BUSH Well, old friend, I’ve got about 40 pounds of change right here after that last knee op, but you know what they say…
GABRIEL Plus c’est change...
BUSH and GABRILE Plus c’est la meme chose!
Patrick smiles behind the bar, while Ste looks confused.
PATRICK The more that things change, the more they stay the same.
BUSH Amen, brother!
Patrick pours himself a shot of Talisker. He holds it up to the others, they all drink.
PATRICK Well, looks like we’ve gotten things started here. Other than a dead body, a missin’ captain, and a freaky blood sucker, things are lookin’ good. Cheers mates!
Morgan leaves the chaos of the dining saloon, hurry’s to the elevator. She leans forward, pushes the call button. She opens her purse, takes out her room key, then looks at her watch.
Her face is expressionless as she stares at the elevator light on the wall. Deep in thought, she taps her index finger on her lips.
The elevator door opens.
SANDRA E. stands inside the elevator. Her long brown hair is tucked up under a turquoise scarf; around her neck dangles a small leather pouch. She clutches at the pouch momentarily, her lips move as she whispers something to herself.
Morgan looks at Sandra.
Sandra fidgets, acts nervous as she sees Morgan standing there. She stays left as she exits to keep from bumping into Morgan. They exchange positions.
Morgan pushes the hold button on the elevator. Her eyes are focused on Sandra.
MORGAN (her voice low) I hope there’s something special in that pouch of yours.
Morgan’s eyes move to Sandra’s hands.
MORGAN You’ve just missed the first bit of excitement on this voyage of ours…
Morgan hesitates.
MORGAN That is unless…you’re involved…
Sandra looks confused.
SANDRA What? Excuse me? What are you talking about?
MORGAN Someone has been murdered on this boat. I hope that little pouch of yours holds some protective, magical power…you’re going to need it. We’re ALL going to need it.
Sandra brings her hands back to the smooth leather pouch as if protecting it.
Morgan pushes the “up” button, joins her hands together in front of her, while she fixes a cool smile on Sandra. The door closes between them.
INT FOURTH FLOOR UPPER DECK
Morgan exits the elevator and hurries down the long, narrow hallway, lit softly with sconces that cast amber shadows along the corridor.
She feels something…someone. She turns…nothing…there’s no one there.
She slips her key into the door, steps inside and quickly closes it behind her.
INT CABIN 402
Inside she reaches for the light switch, then stops…drops her hand, leaves the light off. She waits…standing in the dark, motionless.
Her eyes are fixed on the light coming in from under the door. A knowing smile comes to her lips…and there it is…a dark shadow blocks the light. She holds her breath…the shadow is still, then disappears.
She flips on the light, heads directly for the small kitchen counter where a bottle of Crown Royal sits. She pours herself a shot, raises it to her lips, takes a big drink, swallows then exhales the fumes.
She looks up at the ceiling and rubs her neck.
MORGAN Shit! This is going to be some boat ride!
She moves to her bathroom, stands in front of the mirror and twirls her long auburn hair into a soft bun. She picks up an eight inch hair pin, the end is adorned in silver…she pushes it through her hair.
She applies lipstick, admires herself in the mirror and smiles with a wink.
INT FOURTH FLOOR HALLWAY
She exits her cabin, moving to the elevator, she keeps a watchful eye. She enters the elevator, heading to the Bridge.
EXT BRIDGE DECK
Morgan walks softly as she nears the Bridge. The door is open…she stands in the darkness, watching Cornetto move about the room.
INT BRIDGE
Cornetto is busy, his head down, as he pushes buttons on the ships control panel. He writes something in the log book.
Morgan steps inside.
MORGAN I’d say it’s been a long time Cornetto…
Recognition lights his face as he turns toward her voice. His eyes soften for a brief moment, then…turn to steel.
CORNETTO Yes it has…it’s been a very long time Morgan.
MORGAN It doesn’t look like much has changed…except for …you’ve gained a little weight I see.
She grins as she leans against the console…takes a cigarette from her purse, lights it, inhales and blows out the smoke.
CORNETTO Can’t say the same for you…since when do smoke?
MORGAN Hmmm…I think since you Cornetto…
She points at him with her cigarette.
MORGAN Yep that’s it…since YOU.
She takes another drag. Their eyes are locked on each other…he looks away. She moves closer.
MORGAN (speaks softly) So tell me…what happened below? Everyone was cozy in the Dinning Saloon when DOE came barging in, all cut up. He blurts out the words “captain” and “murder”…just before he dies. Did you have anything to do with this?
CAPTAIN CORNETTO Nope.
MORGAN Funny…people always seem to die when you’re around. With "murder" and "captain" on Doe's dying lips, people are naturally going to suspect you...
She shoots him a sarcastic, mocking smile as she turns and exits the Bridge, making her way back to her cabin.
INT CABIN 402
Morgan heads straight for the Crown bottle, pours a shot and takes a sip, sets the glass down and covers her face with her hands.
MORGAN (whispers) Why are you here Cornetto? Why is this happening again?
She walks to her bed, sits down, kicks off her heels.
I love words and the fact that when the page is blank...there's nothing there until words are formulated in my brain. Those thoughts...rushing through my viens and out my finger tips, find "life" on the page.
When people and places come to life...that to me is exciting.
MBCgirl =) My finger nails should look nice while I type - Red works!
Mistress Morgan sits on the bed. A glass of Crown Royal in her hand. She reaches over to the night stand, grabs a small but fancy shopping bag. She takes out a perfume bottle. Puts some behind her ears.
Light seeps in under the cabin door. A shadow goes by, but soon returns and stops outside the door. There’s a knock at the door.
Morgan looks up. A smile spreads across her face.
MORGAN I knew you couldn’t stay away Cornetto.
She gets up, straightens her clothes and with a feminine swagger glides to the door, opens it.
To her disappointment she finds Countess Zadora outside.
Zadora smiles... the smile never reaches her eyes.
ZADORA I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to interrupt anything.
MORGAN No no. It’s fine... Can I help you?
Zadora pulls out a diamond ring. Shows it to Morgan. Morgan’s eyes widen at the sight of the huge jewel.
ZADORA I found this in the dining room. I thought, maybe it’s yours…
Morgan steps aside. Her eyes never leave the ring.
MORGAN Please come in.
Zadora enters the cabin. Morgan gestures for Zadora to sit down on the bed. She does. Morgan sits down next to her, eyes still on the ring.
MORGAN ...I believe that could be my ring. Yes it definitely could be.
ZADORA Are you missing one?
Zadora studies Morgan from top to toe. Her gaze lingers on Morgan’s long slender neck. The tip of Zadora’s tongue wets her blood red lips.
MORGAN No...I mean yes. Yes I am missing one.
Zadora crinkles her nose.
ZADORA What’s that smell?
MORGAN (eyes still on the rock) Oh, it’s my perfume. Here, smell it.
She stretches her neck. Moves closer to Zadora. Zadora leans in. Her nose touches Morgan’s neck. Eyes closed. Lips parted... Suddenly she recoils. Shudders.
Morgan looks up for the first time. Horror in her eyes.
MORGAN What! Is it bad? I just bought it.
ZADORA You ate that garlic Foccacia at dinner. Didn’t you?
Morgan is mortified. She puts her hand in front of her mouth. Breathes into it, smells her breath.
MORGAN I have garlic breath!! No wonder Cornetto was so cold towards me!
Morgan rushes into the bathroom.
Zadora puts the ring away. Gets up, turns to the door. The cape swirls around her and then she’s gone.
INT. BRIDGE
Captain Cornetto gazes out the large window into the moonlit night. He picks up a pair of big binoculars. Scans the horizon.
CORNETTO Bermuda Triangle… Ha ha, what nonsense. Nothing bad ever happens out here.
He senses something. Lowers the binoculars. Turns around. Startled, he comes face to face with Zadora.
CORNETTO Ahh!... Sorry. I didn’t hear you come in.
She smiles slyly at him. Takes the binoculars away from him, puts them to her eyes gazes out at the night.
ZADORA I didn’t mean to scare you.
The Captain looks offended.
CORNETTO I wasn’t scared.
She laughs at him.
ZADORA So tell me Captain… anything dangerous out there in the night?
CORNETTO No, there never is.
ZADORA The dangers are all in here?
Cornetto’s eyes narrow. An evil grin adorns his face.
CORNETTO You have no idea.
Zadora stares out at one particular place.
ZADORA What’s that, over there?
Cornetto squints, leans closer to the window. Zadora lowers the binoculars. Her eyes change from blue to black. She takes a step back.
CORNETTO There’s nothing out there.
ZADORA I know…
WHAM!!
She hits him in the back of his head with the heavy binoculars. The Captain groans, sinks to his knees. He’s out cold.
She rolls him over on his back. His eyes dart under the eyelids.
ZADORA Aww… you’re so cute! You look just like a teddy bear.
She pulls a scalpel out from underneath her cape, scans the Captain’s body up and down.
ZADORA Where do we cut? Where do we cut?
She picks up his wrist. Turns it vein side up, leans in, runs her nose along it and inhales deeply. Eyes closed.
ZADORA Mmmm.
She makes a two inch incision along the Captain’s wrist. Thick red blood slowly trickles out.
ZADORA Ooh… look at that. Vilken delikatess!
She sticks the tip of her tongue into the cut. Runs it deep inside along the length of it. She opens her mouth, surrounds the cut, drains the blood out of the good Captain.
After a moment she looks up. Blood drips from the corners of her mouth.
ZADORA So rich. Such a delicacy… but I must stop now. Your cholesterol is so high. I must think of my health.
She puts his arm down on the floor. The blood slowly drains out. Cornetto looks pale. Zadora pinches the Captain’s nose. Covers his mouth with the other hand. Cornetto spasms for a few seconds then finally goes limp.
ZADORA Min kära kapten, jag är ledsen, men jag var tvungen. Jag var hungrig.
She gets up. Looks at him with affection.
ZADORA I’m sorry… I guess the second captain will have to drive this boat from now on.
A panicked look comes over Zadora. She stares down at Cornetto with fear.
Dana Orange leans back in her chair, her feet propped on the table, sandwiched between two empty plates. She softly strums a sad song, her eyes staring out towards the horizon of the sea, lost in a trance.
NIC You wouldn’t believe the kind of stuff people leave on their plates.
Dana turns to Nic, startled, her playing abruptly stopped. He sets a plate of scavenged pieces of food on the table and takes a seat.
NIC (continuing) Potatoes, shrimp...Zadora didn’t even touch her food. Makes you wonder how they’re all going to get through the night huh?
She eyes him momentarily, gauging his stature and intent.
ORANGE I guess.
She turns her head back to the sea and picks up where she left off. Nic pauses, trying to think of something to spark a better conversation.
NIC Tough night for the deck hand huh?
ORANGE Yeah.
NIC A strange night to die indeed.
Nic looks up towards the moon. It is full and bright.
NIC Such a beautiful night though.
Dana’s eyes trace upwards.
ORANGE You know what they say about a full moon, right?
Nic chuckles.
NIC Werewolves?
Dana turns to him, her eyes never betraying her calm demeanor.
ORANGE Vampires.
NIC What?
ORANGE A body bathed too long in the moonlight becomes a vampire. You’ve never heard that?
NIC I guess not, but then again, I’m not one for folklore. You know all that...bigfoot, Vampires and leprechaun crap? I have yet to see a picture of a vampire and until I do...
ORANGE Just because you say something doesn’t exist, doesn’t mean it can’t exist.
NIC That’s a lot of negativity in that sentence. I don’t think I approve.
Orange bursts into a giant laughter. Nic smiles.
NIC Ah, I gotcha!
Orange just rolls her eyes and continues to strum, this time the song seems more neutral.
ALFFY HUDSON, a young looking 30 year old, dressed in a fine suit appears from the bar area catching Nic and Dana’s attention. He is counts a few bills and chuckles to himself before looking up and noticing Nic and Dana staring at him. He SHOVES the money into his pocket and nods at them. Nic raises his camera and takes a picture of Alffy. The flash from the camera catches Dana’s attention.
ORANGE You know in some cultures, taking pictures of people without their permission is like stealing a part of their soul.
NIC Well aren’t you full of facts and figures tonight?
Alffy approaches their table with a smile on his face.
ALFFY It doesn’t matter to me,I’m sure I could always just...steal it back.
ORANGE You can’t steal a soul back.
ALFFY Sure I can.
ORANGE Trust me, you can't.
NIC No, no, I think he’s right. I mean, if you can steal it in the first place what’s to say you can’t steal it again? There is no limits on how much a soul can be stolen, right?
Dana stares at them both in disbelief.
ORANGE I am not having this conversation right now.
Nic chuckles and Alffy just smiles.
ALFFY So what are you two doing down here? A lot of people are up at the bar. They’re having a real good time.
Nic shrugs.
NIC I like to move around unnoticed, you know? Makes for the best photos.
Alffy nods as his eyes trace down to Orange’s black boots. He notices the silver object tucked inside her left boot. He tilts his head.
ALFFY What’s that in your shoe?
Orange’s music abruptly stops and she takes her feet off the table. Nic and Alffy eye her suspiciously. She stands up and throws her guitar around her neck.
ORANGE I’m going to have the word with the captain.
Orange begins to walk away, Nic stays there momentarily confused about what just happened before a small smile creeps into the corner of his mouth. He raises his camera and takes a picture of her. Orange stops and turns around. She glares at him before continuing through towards the bridge. Nic sighs and leans back. Alffy stares at Nics plate of food momentarily before leaning forward.
ALFFY You gonna eat that?
INT. BRIDGE
Dana turns the corner to see Cornetto laying on the floor in a puddle of blood.
ORANGE S**t.
She looks around, checking her surroundings before taking the guitar off her neck and gently resting it up against the wall. She slowly makes her way towards Cornetto, and kneels beside him, raising his head in her hands. She leans down towards his face, listening for something. She hears nothing.
ORANGE You’re still warm. That’s good.
She lowers her head and looks out towards the moon. It bathes Cornetto like a mother does its child. She turns to Cornetto and stares into his dull and vacant eyes. She smooths down his blood soaked hair before lowering his head gently back onto the floor and reaching into her shoe. She pulls out a thin silver tin. She looks around once more before opening the tin and retrieving a rolled up piece of cloth from within. She sets the cloth on the floor, and rolls it out to reveal a wooden stake and red butterfly knife.
ORANGE Purely precaution my friend. Not my usual choice of blade but, it’s definitely more...subtle.
She takes the crystal and places it on his forehead. She closes her eyes. A blue light swirls around the gem and Cornetto’s head before disappearing inside the crystal. It glows momentarily before fading.
ORANGE That oughta hold you for now.
She places the gem back onto the cloth rolls it up. She then places the tin back into her shoe and rolls her pants down over it. She stands up beside his body and stares at him, the moonlight shining on them both. She sighs. She tilts her head curiously and speaks in a soft voice as if cooing a baby to sleep.
ORANGE Who’s going to drive the boat?
A dark shadow moves quickly behind her, startling her. She turns around to see no one there.
ORANGE Hello?
A chill comes over her body and she shakes it off. She walks over to her guitar and slings it around her neck. He exits the bridge, heading for the bar.
Orange enters. She shudders in fright from a loud SHOUT, coming from inside.
She finds the source: Ste, SHOUTING joyously, at the bartop.
Gabriel watches him in amusement. Bush, sitting close by, downs his fourth drink.
CLICKING sounds followed by flashing lights on Ste. Nic shows himself with his trusty camera already at work.
STE (shouting at Nic) I won!
MONTAGE – PICTURES OF STE
Ste with his arms in the air smiling brightly.
Ste’s mouth shaped in a O directly at the camera.
Ste brandishing his earnings.
Ste’s feet, mid motion of a jig.
The last picture is Gabriel sitting down with a smirk on his face.
END OF MONTAGE
Nic smiles as he stops and fidgets with his camera.
STE (to Nic) I want copies of that. (to Gabriel) You’re good Ripley.
GABRIEL Not good enough to beat you. Good call on calling my bluff.
STE Man! That was close! Let me buy you drink.
GABRIEL Nah. I don’t drink. After getting pummeled, I’m going to sleep it off. Nice playing with you Mr...
STE Brown.
GABRIEL Brown. Maybe we play another time.
STE Sure?
GABRIEL Positive. We have a long trip ahead of us and hopefully we can have more people involve.
STE Whenever you’re ready.
GABRIEL Mr. Bush.
Gabriel leaves, smiling. He passes Alffy who doesn’t notice him. Alffy’s attention rests on the cash on the bartop.
STE (stuffing the money in his pockets) This yank is sure loaded.
BUSH You never heard of him?
Ste shrugs.
BUSH He’s one of the wealthiest men in the world.
STE Billionaire?
BUSH More. There’s not a word invented for the amount of money he has.
STE Wow.
BUSH Supposedly, he killed all his business opponents, which is bull since the courts showed that he wasn’t even near the victims. And that they all put him in their will. It’s difficult to forge a will, according to the specialists. No. He and I are the same. We’re surrounded by envious people, who find anyway to disgrace a person’s name.
Bush raises an empty glass.
STE Want another one?
BUSH Thanks. Mind if I do.
Alffy looks back in the direction where Gabriel left.
Ste (O.S.) So, how loaded are you talking about?
INT. ELEVATOR ENTRANCE
Gabriel pushes the elevator “up” button. He’s smile has faded away, replaced by a cold calculating look. He looks at his watch and presses the “up” button again.
The door opens. Sandra’s inside, scared.
GABRIEL Are you alright?
SANDRA I heard a scream.
GABRIEL Oh, that was Mr. Ste Brown. He and I were having a card game, he won.
SANDRA No one died.
GABRIEL Died?
SANDRA This lady told me that someone died.
GABRIEL One of the captain’s workers.
SANDRA Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.
GABRIEL Calm down.
SANDRA There’s a murderer on the boat and you’re telling me to calm down!
GABRIEL You’re blowing this out of proportion. Come out.
SANDRA No!
She fights Gabriel off.
SANDRA I’m safe here.
GABRIEL Alright. Have it your way.
The doors close, closing Sandra in. Gabriel takes the stairs.
AT BRIDGE DECK
Gabriel walks. He stops at the CAPTAIN STATEROOM. Checking inside, he finds no one.
GABRIEL Captain?
Gabriel goes onto the bridge deck.
GABRIEL Cap…
Captain Cornetto lies dead on the floor. He’s pale as paper, except for his wrist which is covered in red.
Gabriel examines the area, finding it slit. He lets out a LAUGH.
GABRIEL (to himself) Thanks Stolas. (to Captain) Well, captain...
He picks up the body.
GABRIEL Sorry to say but...
He moves the captain’s body to the rail --
GABRIEL You are officially retir-
ZADORA (O.S.) No!
Appearing from behind, Zadora pulls Gabriel away from Cornetto. Cornetto’s body stands up right on the rail.
She holds a scalpel to Gabriel’s throat.
GABRIEL Countess. How good for you to show yourself?
ZADORA Do I know you?
GABRIEL You will later, but for now...catch!
Gabriel kicks at Cornetto, causing him to flip over.
Zadora lets go of Gabriel and makes a grab at Cornetto, grabbing on to his legs.
ZADORA Help!
Gabriel flees.
Just Murdered by Sean Elwood (Zombie Sean) and Gabriel Moronta (Mr. Ripley) - (Dark Comedy, Horror) All is fair in love and war. A hopeless romantic gay man resorts to bloodshed to win the coveted position of Bridesmaid. 99 pages. https://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-comedy/m-1624410571/
The S.S. Craven sails into what what seems as darkness, but above the ship, fizzling particulates flicker obscurely- orange sparks that can only mean one thing- the Bermuda Triangle Paradox.
SERIES OF SHOTS:
INT. BRIDGE DECK 506 MAIN STAIRCASE
Gabriel's cloned equal scurries down the stairs, away from Zadora whilst:
Our beloved Gabriel, assassin for the A side of The Agency-- killer for the good cause, heads to the elevator.
EXT. BRIDGE DECK
Zadora, shakes her head, clutches her chest, pain extinguishing the coldness of her stare. She's confused and disoriented. She staggers along the bridge whispering:
Zadora Sandra? I remember. My sister. Who am I?
Trying to find her way, she enters to the insides of the bridge and down a long corridor. She reads the numbers. They are blurring out of focus. She finally makes it to:
INT. CAPTAIN'S STATEROOM
Zadora enters explosively and there- sitting neatly with a glass of wine by his side: Cornetto, a look of shock.
Zadora I never wanted to be a superhero. Born with the gift- born with a curse. I can feel it-- the B side of The Agency is taking over, every time I get close into the nightmare, I get trapped by my genetics.
Cornetto I should have seen this coming. It's my fault. Hopefully Sandra can get the Portal opened before I shift course into the center of this three sided gate of dreams or nightmares or-
Zadora Hopefully Bert can find the genetic print for time gates.
Cornetto Before the bloody B side does. Or nature's scales are going to tip to the side of thorns and thistles and-
Zadora Terror.
Cornetto Let's get to the Medical Center and find out if Bert's got a soul for transplant. Doe really did believe in Bert's work- even when the rest of academia said he was a fool- so much so he gave his life to prove it.
Cornetto hands Zadora his glass of wine.
Cornetto This might help to keep Ms. Hyde away for awhile. I've infused it with Vale salts- it's helped me a lot, but they're not the answer to the disease. We better get going.
Zadora and Cornetto exit.
INT. ELEVATOR
Sandra frantically punches keys on a small pyramid shaped locating device.
Sandra I'll be safe alright... (ad-libs of numerical sequences)safe if I can get this piece of crap--
The device makes a low spiraling noise-- like a "you lose".
Sandra Come on! We've got quantum-bloody-military-take-me-to-the-top-technology-- what the hell's wrong?! Think!
Sandra bangs her head on the wall.
EXT. ELEVATOR
Our beloved Gabriel watches as the elevator opens. This just happened didn't it? But...
INT. ELEVATOR
Sandra hauls the refined Gabriel into the elevator causing him to trip inside. She bangs the button.
Sandra No time to explain, but we've got clones on the ship and yours just came visiting and he looked as dark as Hell.
Gabriel notices the ring on Sandra's hand.
Gabriel You're married? Don't tell me, your boss?
Sandra I'm the psychic one, you're the one who induces people into hysterical laughter- remember? Quit trying to screw with things.
Sandra starts laughing hysterically.
Gabriel smiles.
Sandra (can't stop laughing) Ok, ok, I give. You've still got it even in this blasted triangle. Wish I could say the same-
Gabriel (slumping down to the floor) You can't figure the sequence to open the portal? Your powers aren't working?
Sandra (fumbling with the keys) The energy fields are interfering with my abilities. Wait- if my psychic power won't work then
Dual Dialogue How 'bout we do it the old fashioned way.
Sandra stops to look at Gabriel.
Sandra Will you stop that.
Gabriel That is weird isn't it.
Sandra Gonna use the old intellect... (punching keys) One plus one equals two.
Gabriel Oh that IS brilliant!
Sandra breaks into hilarity. Then...
Gabriel Did I do that?
Sandra Just messin' with ya. One- I've got the genetic code for a Human inside this baby and two- I've got Bert's new soul code- put the two together and what've you got?
Gabriel I give up. A Klingon?
Sandra Put man and soul together and I think you've got a God.
A final few clicks and...
The device rings upwards in success!
Suddenly, The Everly Brothers, All I Have to do is Dream descends all over the ship.
Gabriel and Sandra look up- completely overcome by the music, they begin to waltz inside the elevator.
INTERCUT:
SERIES OF SHOTS: as people look in confusion. Where is this coming from?
Gabriel It's open! The dream generators been opened!
Just then the DOORS OPEN.
Sandra Floor #1 Housewares, Ladies accessories, Giftware department and (smiling) UGLY DEMONS FROM HELL. For your shopping convenience we've got crystal soul stealers, power rings, amulets and vices galore.
Gabriel (Breaking into hysterical laughter) Stop that!
Sandra You stop it- mind guru.
Their powers seem to keep exchanging themselves, but they're confused about it.
They enter on:
THE LOWER DECK
You'd think they've been drinking. Sandra shoves Gabriel; he shoves her back.
Gabriel (laughing) That song won't quit- how the hell are we gonna clear the nightmares that threaten the world? (laughing harder).
Sandra (poking Gabriel in the stomach) Money buys a lot Gabriel. I wish your money could buy us some time.
Gabriel's laugh inducing powers are clearly out of control. Sandra's wariness has evaporated.
INT. MEDICAL CENTER
Zadora and Michael and T. Joe watch as Bert places two gyrating crystal balls next to Doe's temples.
Bert The A part of the agency always had a weakness- mercy.
T. Joe And B is consumed by an endless hunger.
Zadora And we're all experiencing that game play out first hand.
Cornetto Sucks to have a body sometimes.
Zadora turns at the word suck.
Zadora Suck?
She heads to Cornetto. T Joe grabs her but she throws him off with supernatural strength.
INT. GYMNASIUM Gabriel, in his suit, and Sandra, now wearing an evening dress, are playing badminton- laughing- crazy.
Gabriel I wonder why they call it badminton.
Hits the bird.
Sandra Like what's bad about it?
Gabriel We're all on this ship for a reason.
Sandra I've figured that out. To die!
More side splitting laughter from both of them. The Everly Brothers grow louder as we exit the gymnasium to see:
Alffy strides with purpose, his hands buried in his pockets. He rounds the corner and backs up quickly out of view, he watches Gabriel disappear inside the elevator.
Alffy leans back against the wall, his hands fidget in his trousers. His lip curls and his eye twitches as he adjusts his crotch. He takes a deep breath and turns the corner, YOHN YOHNSON stands before him.
Yohn adjusts his clearly fake mustache with apparent confidence and stares Alffy down.
Alffy scowls back, his hands rummage deep in his pockets. He notices a large bulge in Yohn's trousers. He lowers his head, gives it a shake and calmly walks past.
Yohn removes a handgun from his trousers and puts inside his jacket.
INT. CAPTAIN'S STATEROOM
The door slowly opens and Alffy's head swings in to view. He glances round the room and enters.
He heads straight to a large book and flips it open, his finger traces down a list of passenger names and settles under the name of Gabriel M.Ripley. He grabs a pen and scribes something down on a piece of paper and stuffs inside his pocket before leaving.
INT. CABIN 86
Alffy stands over a jug of water, a small pill clasped between his fingers. He pauses and moves toward a bottle of Vodka, its seal broken. He unscrews the cap and drops the pill inside.
INT. CORRIDOR
Yohn Yohnson stands in front of the elevator and presses the down button. He looks behind him as the door opens.
Sandra sits curled in the corner, slowly rocking back and forth in a trance as she clutches the pouch around her neck.
Yohn turns back and stares inquisitively at Sandra.
YOHN Hey, you alright down there?
Sandra continues to rock.
Yohn reaches down and tugs on her arm.
YOHN Miss, are you....
Sandra looks up as Yohn's false mustache falls from his face.
Sandra screams
Yohn jumps back.
YOHN Sorry, I never meant to startle you.
SANDRA Who are you, and what's wrong with your face?
Yohn clutches his mouth, feels it with his fingers and realises his cover is blown. He looks down, snatches his mustache and sticks it back on upside down.
SANDRA Murderer! Murderer!
Yohn panics and flaps his arms in attempt to calm Sandra down.
YOHN Calm down, I'm not a murderer.
His handgun becomes visible inside his jacket.
Sandra notices and her eyes bulge with panic. She jumps to her feet...
YOHN Just calm...
Sandra thumps him in the nose and runs off down the corridor.
Yohn clutches his face, his eyes fill with water.
YOHN shit.
INT. ROOM 87
Alffy sits on the bed, his eyes wander deep into the corners of the room. He puffs out his cheeks and exhales with boredem.
A thud from next door.
He smiles, jumps up and rubs his hands together like a bad movie villian.
INT. ROOM 86
Alffy enters and freezes at the sight of Sandra on the floor. He closes the door and removes a scrunched up piece of paper from his pocket. He stares at the number '86' scribbled on it. He rolls his eyes and turns the paper to read '98'.
He mouths the word 'Bollocksl'.
He shrugs his shoulders, leans over Sandra and snaps the pouch from around her neck and stuffs in his pocket. Before removing his hand he has a quick adjustment and then a more servere scratch.
Sandra's head rolls on the carpet, a smile across her face. She twitches and startles Alffy.
Alffy rummages through a nearby drawer and pockets anything of interest.
Sandra's fidgets become more frequent and begin to simulate actual movements.
Alffy watches with interest.
A noise from outside the room distracts Alffy and he stands transfixed on the door. Footsteps grow louder, approaching.
Sandra sits up behind him.
SANDRA I've figured that out. To die!
Alffy panics at Sandra's outburst, snatches an object from the dresser and slaps her across the face with it. She falls back with a sickening thud and lays silent.
Alffy looks at the object in his hand, a blood stained ashtray.
He turns back to the door as the footsteps near.
GABRIEL (O.S.) My word against hers, and who's gonna believe her?
Alffy braces the door with his back. He stares at the ashtray and then at Sandra.
Blood pools around her head.
Alffy listens as the footsteps fade out. He opens the door and exits.
EXT. DECK - NIGHT
Alffy throws the ashtray into the ocean and takes a deep breath. He puts his hand in his trousers, his eye squints as he yanks at his crotch.
Check out my scripts...if you want to, no pressure.
Patrick stares out at the calm, black seas while he smokes a cigarette.
A deep inhale followed by a puff of white smoke which gathers in the air above his head like a cloud.
FOOTSTEPS approach, Patrick lets the cigarette drop over the railing and quickly turns.
Dr. Newcomer and T. Joe turn the corner and see Patrick.
BERT HaHa! Caught you Murphy. I thought I had ordered you to stop?
PATRICK I tried, I really did. But things seem a little stressed round here. Needed something, you know, to take the edge off.
BERT If it is the edge taking off you need I am sure I have got something a little better than tobacco in my bag. (beat) Anyway, Is the bar open?, I think we deserve a drink.
PATRICK Yeah, there are a few drinkers still around. Go help yourself to the Jameson's, be there in a minute.
Bert and T.Joe make their way into the bar.
Patrick lights another cigarette and turns back to face the ocean.
EXT. BRIDGE DECK - AT THE SAME TIME
Zadora leans over the railing clutching at Captain Cornetto's arm.
She is struggling to hold his weight.
Zadora I am sorry, I can't hold on any longer.
She lets go of her grip and falls backwards in a heap on the deck floor, she lets out a tortured SCREAM.
EXT. DECK
Patrick stares out to sea, something falls in front of him and hits the waves with a loud splash.
PATRICK Man overboard! Man overboard!
The wiry little Irishman wastes no time and quickly rips off his suit and shoes.
PATRICK Help! Man overboard!
Patrick grabs hold of a life ring and jumps over the railing and into the ocean below. He hits the cold water and disappears beneath the surface.
It seems like an eternity before he re-appears with the ring still in his hands. Ahead he can see somebody bobbing up and down, he swims strongly towards it.
He eventually reaches the body, turns it over and reveals Cornetto's dead face.
PATRICK Captain. Oh Jesus no.
Patrick holds on tight to both Cornetto and the ring, it is attached to a rope which in turn Patrick hopes is still attached to the ship.
Struggling in the water he turns towards the giant ship.
PATRICK Help! Help!
He is tiring, water splashes his face. The struggle to keep Cornetto afloat seems to take its toll.
After a while everything goes dark.
INT. PATRICK'S CABIN
Patrick opens his eyes, he is laying on his own bed. He slowly looks around the room, trying to make sense of what is happening.
The bathroom door opens and into the bedroom walks Sanda. She is dressed only in a bathrobe, she stands at the foot of his bed.
SANDRA I thought you might be dead.
PATRICK I was beginning to think the same.
SANDRA I am happy you're not.
She slowly opens her bathrobe to reveal her nakedness underneath and lets it drop to the floor.
Patrick looks confused, he tries to edge away from Sandra, he leans back against the headboard.
PATRICK What in God's name are you doing?
SANDRA Don't ask questions, just do as I say. (beat) You want a smoke?
Patrick nods.
Sandra's hand rises up to the top of her head and slowly peels the top of her skull away, her hand delves into her head and brings out a glass ashtray. It is covered in her blood and pieces of skull and brain. She offers it to Patrick.
PATRICK What the hell?
Sandra now looks mad, her eyes light up with vivid red and yellow colours. She throws the ashtray against the wall shattering it to thousands of pieces.
SANDRA I told you not to ask questions!
Suddenly her breasts start to grow, swelling up as though something is inside and trying to get out.
Patrick jumps from the bed and runs to the door, he knocks over a lamp and it smashes to the floor. He tries to open the door but it is locked shut.
He turns to face Sandra frightened. She is now standing in the middle of the room, her breasts are expanding at a rapid rate, her eyes are now bright red.
Finally Sandra's gigantic mammaries can no longer take the stress and burst open with an explosion so big that beams of light shoot out and turn everything bright white.
Patrick SCREAMS, he is terrified, he SCREAMS again.
INT. MEDICAL CENTRE
That is until Bert slaps his across the face..
BERT Murphy, it is okay. You are safe now. Calm down.
Patrick opens his eyes and sees that he is laying in the medical centre, Alffy, Gabriel, Bush and Nic all surround him. He lays on a bed wearing only his underwear and black socks. He is dripping wet.
PATRICK What's happening? Where am I?
BERT We pulled you from the water, you passed out. You are lucky we got you in when we did.
Patrick's face is twisted in confusion and fear.
PATRICK Exploding tits.
Bert's mouth curls, puzzled, perplexed. Finally a smile crosses his face.
BERT I think maybe you were dreaming.
Patrick sits up, his face slowly turns to a look of calm.
Suddenly he remembers, concern replaces the calmness.
PATRICK The Captain, It was the Captain. I think he was dead!
BERT It's okay, you got him. He is in my room.
PATRICK He's alive?
BERT I needed to attend to you first, he can wait until we are finished.
PATRICK So he is dead then?
BERT We can talk about that afterwards. You just concentrate on recovering, you have probably got hyperthermia. You could do with some rest.
Patrick knows a fight he cannot win, especially with Bert. He nods his head and turns to the others.
PATRICK Thank you guys, I am in your debt.
ALFFY Think nothing of it, you are the one who deserves the praise after jumping in after the Captain like that.
BUSH Brave or stupid? I can't quite seem to decide.
Nic lifts up his camera and snaps a photograph of Patrick.
ALFFY Do you have to?
As everyone turns their attention towards Nic, Gabriel, quietly and unseen, sneakily exits the medical centre.
Nic is alone inside the elevator. His trusty camera hangs around his neck. The elevator doors open and he heads away.
INT. CORRIDOR
Cooper comes in his direction; she tries to avoid him, by trying to open a locked door. She is forced to face Nic.
NIC You don’t like me much do you?
COOPER You’re a bit weird.
NIC Thanks.
COOPER That’s not a compliment.
NIC Don’t matter.
They fall silent for a moment. Cooper avoids looking at him. From the end of the corridor comes Ste Brown.
STE Nic, damn you.
Ste grabs Cooper by her waist and smiles.
STE C’mon, take a picture of me and this wonderful lady.
NIC Jeez. He’s drunk and I’m out of here.
Nic enters in the dining room. Ste and Cooper share a look then she leaves.
INT. DINING SALOON
Orange’s voice shakes the place, but nobody watches her. What is she, some kind of jukebox? Gabriel cheers from the table blowing kisses at her. Nic approaches Orange after she’s finished with the song.
NIC Lovely.
ORANGE Thanks.
She eyes his camera.
Gabriel watches them.
NIC Why does everyone stare at my camera and not at me? Nothing good comes from this camera. Just, murdered people. Dead things.
Orange looks at him.
ORANGE Well, we can change that, can’t we?
Nic looks perplexed.
ORANGE Let’s go to your room.
NIC My room? For?
ORANGE Photos my dear, just photos.
A wicked smile crosses Nic face.
NIC Meet me on the deck.
INT. ROOM
The room is red lighted. Photos cover all the walls. Murdered people, blood, kids without head – this looks more like police room with photos of victims. There is a place on the wall where empty without a photo. Nic stares at it.
NIC Let’s fill this place.
INT. CORRIDOR
Dana Orange walks alone through the corridor; she’s dressed so pretty a blind man wouldn’t be able to take his eyes off of her.. She enters the elevator.
INT. ELEVATOR
Inside is Alffy.
ALFFY So, you’re going there.
Orange nods.
ALFFY I think you shouldn’t go alone.
Orange smiles then –
ORANGE I’m not.
She exits.
EXT. DECK Orange’s silhouette shows up till she’s lit by the moonlight. Nic is there. He can’t take his eyes off of her and there’s something in them, something…
NIC You’re magnificent.
Orange smiles.
NIC You’re beautiful. (pointing) Go there. The moonlight will add your skin a good color.
Silently Orange obeys. She takes the pose.
CAMERA P.O.V Orange is in frame, Nic focuses on her face – SNAP.
CUT TO:
INT. DINNIG SALOON
Bert is having a drink alone. Ste and Gabriel play poker. Bert looks around the room.
BERT Where’s that singer?
EXT. DECK
Nic lowers the camera. He looks happy, a tear crawls down his cheek. He moves closer.
Orange gazes at him. She’s trembles. She looks around but there’s only Nic. He grabs her and kisses her.
She’s stunned. Nic looks directly in her eyes.
NIC Let’s go to my room.
Orange nods then smiles.
NIC I just got one of the best photos of my life.
Nic exits. Orange hangs back. She scans the deck then she whispers.
ORANGE Gabriel?
NIC (O.S) Dana?
Dana is flustered.
ORANGE Coming Nic.
She hurries off.
After a moment Bush comes on deck.
BUSH Ah! Fresh air.
He notices something down at his feet. Blood. Bush is shocked. He follows the blood trail and finds its source coming from some sacks. He takes the sacks off. Gabriel lies in a pool of blood.
Nic enters, leading Dana in after him. He closes the door behind them and locks it whilst her attention is drawn to the many gruesome photographs mounted on his wall.
ORANGE I didn’t realise you were THIS kind of photographer…
NIC I’m not a photographer Dana; I’m a catcher of emotion, of moments and history, of life… and death. (Grinning) The latter being my personal favourite.
Dana shifts uncomfortably as Nic looks at her with a gaze of sinister desire.
NIC Since I first heard your voice tonight, your sweet, angelic, seductive melody, calling out to me like a… like a Siren!
Dana steps away from Nic.
ORANGE (Laughing nervously) You must really like Copacabana!
NIC I knew you were the reason I came aboard this boat; the reason I brought my camera.
Dana looks around for a means of escape, but the only way out is the door, and Nic stands in her way.
Nic points to the empty spot on the wall in the centre of the other photographs.
NIC You see that empty spot there Dana? I’ve been saving that spot for something special… someone special… special like you.
Dana’s eyes widen as Nic reaches behind his back and reveals a pizza cutter.
Dana loses all fear and looks at Nic with a 'WTF' expression.
ORANGE A pizza cutter… Are you shitting me?!
NIC You looked so beautiful tonight, glowing like a diamond in the moo --
BANG!
The front of Nic’s face explodes, splattering Dana with brains and blood. She screams.
Nic’s body falls to the floor. His camera lands in front of him and flashes, catching the image of his gory, caved- in face.
A beam of light shines into the room through a single bullet hole in the door.
INT. YOHN’S CABIN – BATHROOM
Moments earlier…
Yohn stands before a mirror as he secures an over-sized bandage to his bloody and broken nose. He fails to notice his upside-down moustache.
He takes a small tape recorder from his trouser pocket and presses record.
YOHN First night on the S.S.Craven. Lost sight of Ripley after an incident which appears to be a murder… is he related? I’ll bet my bottom dollar!
Yohn pauses to ponder for a moment…
YOHN Note to self, find out what that phrase means… Anyway; my attempts to locate the scumbag were unsuccessful. I ran into a hostile female… is there any other kind?!
He chuckles consciously into the tape recorder.
YOHN She blew my cover and sucker punched me on the nose.
He gently touches his nose and squirms in pain.
YOHN I think it’s broken. She must’ve seen my weapon… and my gun!
Again he chuckles into the tape recorder, and then takes the tiny, toy-like handgun from his jacket and shoves it back down his pants.
YOHN Note to self, next time buy one of those James Bond wrist-watch laser dart shooting gizmos instead… In any case, I’ve got to proceed with ninja-like caution. Ripley is still out there, and from the sounds of it, indulging in his favourite leisurely pursuit… MURDER!
A knock at the door startles Yohn. He drops the tape recorder onto his foot and yelps.
He bends down to pick it up and bangs his head on the edge of the bathroom counter.
YOHN Sonuva!
A large bump almost instantly appears.
He pockets the tape recorder and rubs his aching head as he meanders to the door of his room.
He opens the door. Nobody there.
He sticks his head out and looks down either end of the corridor. No activity.
He notices red light glowing under the crack of the door from the room opposite his. He shrugs his shoulders and closes the door.
He turns around and comes face-to-face with the ethereal image of Sandra.
Yohn screams and turns to run out of the room but forgets the door is closed and slams into it. He tips backwards like a falling tree and crashes onto the floor.
The gun in his pants goes off as he lands, firing a shot from between his legs which hits the door.
A female shriek is heard from outside.
Smoke flows from the bullet hole between Yohn’s legs.
A translucent Sandra stands over him; upside-down from Yohn’s view.
SANDRA Help me you klutz! The very fabric of reality is being torn around us. Clones, and Vampires, and Ghosts, oh my!
Yohn calmly reaches for his tape recorder and presses record, keeping his eyes fixed on the ghostly apparition above him.
YOHN Note to self… change underpants at next available opportunity.
Sandra points towards the door.
SANDRA Redrum! Redrum!
Yohn sits up and crawls towards the door. He opens it a crack and peeks out. His moustache half dangling on his upper lip.
He sees Dana, covered in blood, hastily fleeing the room opposite his. He spots Nic’s corpse slumped on the floor by the door.
He looks up at the bullet hole he accidentally shot through his door, then at the bullet hole in the door opposite, then at Nic’s body, and puts two and two together... and gets five.
YOHN There’s been another redrum!
He removes the gun from his pants, and grabs his tape recorder.
YOHN Ripley strikes again!
INT. DOCTORS OFFICE
Captain Cornetto lays naked on an operating table. His body strapped down.
Bert enters the room. He snaps on a pair of rubber gloves and eagerly examines the Captain’s blood soaked wrist.
BERT Well now… this is interesting.
He takes a syringe and carefully extracts some of Cornetto’s blood.
MORGAN Cornetto!
Bert turns around to see Morgan stood a few feet away, her face awash with shock and disbelief.
Bert turns to face Morgan, her face awash with shock and disbelief.
His eyes narrow.
BERT You are not supposed to be in here.
Morgan struggles to tear her eyes away from Captain Cornetto, magnificent in his nakedness.
She composes herself.
MORGAN There is trouble...up on deck.
EXT. DECK
Bush helps Ripley to his feet. Bert rushes up, followed by Morgan.
BUSH What kind of ship are you guys running here, doc? Every time I turn around, someone new is getting maimed!
BERT Easy, cholesterol boy. (to Ripley) What happened here? Are you hurt?
RIPLEY It was dark, and it happened so fast. Somebody jumped me. He might have had a moustache, but later it looked like he didn't. It was very odd.
BERT He's obviously delirious. I better take him down to medical for a check.
Bush eases over to Morgan. He slides an arm around her waist.
BUSH We'll keep an eye on things up here, then.
Morgan smiles at Bush.
MORGAN Yes. An excellent idea.
Bert scowls at the pair, but then turns and leads Ripley towards the stairs.
INT. BUSINESS CENTER
Ste sits at a computer. He punches a few keys and the printer next to him begins to hum.
He retrieves the paper. An article about a boxing match.
The headline reads "O'Neil Leaves Opponent Comatose". And there is a picture of Patrick.
Ste chuckles evilly to himself.
STE Never heard of him, eh?
EXT. DECK
Bush sits astride one of the wave runners lined up next to the lifeboats. He makes a "brrrr" sound with his lips, as if he were riding it.
MORGAN You are quite the athlete, aren't you?
BUSH You really know me, don't you?
Morgan leans in close. She strokes his hair. She blows gently into his ear -- and then she whispers.
MORGAN I am drawn to you, Bush. I cannot help myself.
CLINK. Bush looks down to find a handcuff clamped around his wrist. He shoots Morgan a broad grin.
BUSH Oh, one of those, eh?
MORGAN We have a real connection, you and I.
BUSH And what's that?
CLINK. Morgan clamps the other end of the cuffs around the handle of the wave runner.
Bush looks up, confused.
MORGAN Your murdered ex-wife...
BUSH What?
MORGAN ...and my sister!
Bush’s eyes grow wide as Morgan begins unhitching the wave runner. He tugs at the cuffs, but he is locked to the wave runner firm and tight.
BUSH Hey! What do you think you're doing? Let me off of here!
Morgan only laughs -- as she moves to a large crank handle -- and begins lowering the wave runner.
Bush tries to start the engine. Morgan calls down at him over the railing.
MORGAN Oh, it won't start without this, dear!
She tosses the battery over the side. It drops past Bush -- he tries to snag it with his free hand -- but he misses. The battery splashes into the dark water and sinks like a stone.
Bush looks up at Morgan with rage, but she is gone.
He can only hear her laughter as the wave runner begins to lower once more, into the black, inky water of the ocean below.
INT. SAUNA
For a moment, mist and fog are all that can be seen -- but then the steam parts to reveal Zadora -- she lies prone next to a sizzling bed of coals -- naked and magnificent.
She sniffs. She smiles. She raises her head.
A shadowy figure is nearby, but concealed by the steam.
ZADORA I smell blood.
Orange emerges from the steam -- spattered with blood.
She holds a glowing crystal in one hand -- and a crude wooden stake in the other.
ORANGE It will soon be your own blood you smell, Zadora.
ZADORA You!
With uncanny ease, Zadora suddenly flips onto all fours -- poised to strike.
She HISSES like a viper, then springs towards Orange like a cat.
INT. MEDICAL CENTER
Bert enters with Ripley.
They find Ste standing over Patrick's sleeping body with a large pillow.
BERT What are you doing in here?
Ste quickly fluffs the pillow and slips it under Patrick's head.
STE Just...making sure my favorite bartender is comfortable. He needs to get better, you know. I am getting awfully thirsty.
Bert frowns, unconvinced.
INT. ELEVATOR
Alffy opens the pouch he has stolen from Sandra and peeks inside.
Then he shakes the contents into his palm.
It is an odd device shaped like a pyramid. It has numbers on one side, like a keypad.
Alffy smirks, then on a lark, he punches in the numbers 666,
The device lights up. The sides of the pyramid begin to open, revealing the intricate clockwork and wires contained within.
Then the device rises into midair -- as if by magic -- and begins to spin and hum.
ALFFY What the...?
A voice -- Sandra’s voice -- emanates from the wildly spinning device.
SANDRA'S VOICE Error. Life forces reactivated. Error.
Alffy turns -- and panicked -- begins punching furiously at the buttons on the wall behind him, but the elevator will not stop.
Ripley sits on an examination table as Bert examines his wounds. Ste looks on.
And none of them notice as the sheet-covered body behind them sits up on its table.
BERT I think you are going to be fine.
RIPLEY Can you give me a little something for the pain?
STE Yeah...me, too, mate!
Bert frowns at Ste.
And none of them notice as the sheet-covered body stands -- or as the sheet falls away to reveal the naked, bloated, reanimated body of what was once Captain Cornetto.
BERT Well, Ripley, I suppose the only thing left is the rectal exam.
RIPLEY What?
STE What?
BERT Hah-ha...I was just kid...URK!
Bert falls silent -- then falls forward onto the examination table -- a handful of scalpels protruding from his back. As Bert falls, he reveals Cornetto standing behind him.
Ripley and Ste can only stare in shock as Cornetto grabs the scalpels -- pulls them out -- and stabs Bert again -- and again -- until Bert’s limp, lifeless body slides from the table to the floor.
And Ripley and Ste can only watch in awe as Cornetto streaks from the medical center -- running full steam -- laughing hysterically -- naked and magnificent -- and quite insane.