Quoted from Murphy JEFF, a face full of concentration as he bangs the fuck out of his keyboard. The BARS on the window, The Heavy STEEL DOOR of a jail cell. Jeff looks up at the window for a moment and thinks. From outside the window looks just like any other cell window, only this isn't no ordinary prison,  Jeff's cell is just a room in an otherwise normal suburban home. Kids play in the street outside, next door someone is hanging clothes on a line. The sound of Jeff HITTING THE KEYS can still be heard over the more usual sounds of suburbia.

PULLING BACK through the clouds, a JET ROARS by, but we can still hear that fucking keyboard, and Jeff yelling something about format and camera directions.

AND BACK, past the moon, still that keyboard is taking a beating and GARBLE about ANGLE ON.

The keyboard is taking a cosmic beating, 'cause now we're way the fuck back, RIPPING PAST THE RINGS OF SATURN, and those little ice crystals smacking into the camera with each SMACK on that keyboard.

NOW ZOOMING past Pluto, which is now just an asteroid according to science, but we don't fucking care, 'cause the keyboard is still being wailed on.

FASTER AND FASTER WE PULL OUT, the cosmic swirl of the Milky Way, and that CLACK of the keyboard is deafening! Alpha Centari, galaxy after galaxy RIPS PAST, CLACK, CLACK, CLACK,..until...

WE STOP.

BEFORE US is a marble. A fucking marble, with our Universe inside. But more incredible than that...the typing has stopped. And all we hear is a little boy sobbing.

Quoted from Murphy JEFF, a face full of concentration as he bangs the fuck out of his keyboard. The BARS on the window, The Heavy STEEL DOOR of a jail cell. Jeff looks up at the window for a moment and thinks. From outside the window looks just like any other cell window, only this isn't no ordinary prison,  Jeff's cell is just a room in an otherwise normal suburban home. Kids play in the street outside, next door someone is hanging clothes on a line. The sound of Jeff HITTING THE KEYS can still be heard over the more usual sounds of suburbia. Or something like that anyway, the point is you do not need to write WIDER or any camera angles at all. The idea is to write how the film looks in your head and trying to get that on the page in such a way that it is clear to the director what you had in mind but without telling him his job.

Actaully cloroxmartini's WIDER... WIDER STILL is stronger in this context.


Not sure about this topic though. There are valid reason writers are told to not include camera directions. If you don't know what you're doing: chaos. But in the TIGHT ON example, I gotta say the directions can not only be useful, but downright strong.

There are some good arguments on both sides. There are very few absolutes and like Lakewood says, Camera Directions are part of the writers tool group and should be used if they would add to the story.

I would say that in his example the Close On's help to set the scene. They are being used for a specific thematic purpose; To signpost the characters inner life, the fact that he's using medication and is reading all kinds of self help books.

If you take them out of that script the emphasis intended might be missed. Rather than being a small, tightly defined portrait of this mans character, the scene might become a typical opening and the information would get passed over in a wide.

The only thing that I absolutely abhor in scripts is unflimmables, but I've made that point before and I won't go back to those dark days.

Screenplays are a blue print for films and you should try to make your intentions specific and clear. The writer here is showing you that he's thought about what each image means and is condensing the world into these tight spaces which mirrors the character of the man on screen. He's putting you as the reader/viewer into the mindset of his character.

Quoted from bert I have been digging the hell out of this site lately, from another thread that got very little attention: http://scriptshadow.blogspot.com/ It is a treasure-trove for good, fresh unproduced scripts that are attracting attention. Camera angles?  Pfft.  Who gives a rat's butt? Read freshly minted and sold scripts.  See what is selling.  Use that format. It is that simple and that hard. Damn good website.  A shame more people did not notice it.

I read a script from this link titled: SOURCE CODE

I invite y'all to read it. Full of everything "you ain't supposed to do."

But what a cool story.

I haven't read the entire thread- only Lakewood's kick off, but I agree within a certain context, that context being skillful application and knowledge thereof.

It comes down to story and character and skill and a whole lot else beside any one thing when we're talking about screenwriting.

I've taken a look at a version of the Benjamin Button script and it's crammed with paragraphs we're I'd actually have to count the lines that are together. Certainly, a lot more than a finger width of 3-4 lines- so that blows the theory of white space on the page out of the water. (Although it's still a good idea I think if you're trying to get read).

So if you believe your camera directions "serve" your script. Camera direct away I guess. I certainly wouldn't pass on a good story just because it had camera directions, but that's just me. I'm sure there are others who would.

Sandra

Quoted from bert I have been digging the hell out of this site lately, from another thread that got very little attention: http://scriptshadow.blogspot.com/ It is a treasure-trove for good, fresh unproduced scripts that are attracting attention. Camera angles?  Pfft.  Who gives a rat's butt? Read freshly minted and sold scripts.  See what is selling.  Use that format. It is that simple and that hard. Damn good website.  A shame more people did not notice it.

I knew about his site. Also knew he got band from a website where all the latest and hottest scripts get put up because he posted them openly online. H

Quoted from Scar Tissue Films There are some good arguments on both sides. There are very few absolutes and like Lakewood says, Camera Directions are part of the writers tool group and should be used if they would add to the story. I would say that in his example the Close On's help to set the scene. They are being used for a specific thematic purpose; To signpost the characters inner life, the fact that he's using medication and is reading all kinds of self help books. If you take them out of that script the emphasis intended might be missed. Rather than being a small, tightly defined portrait of this mans character, the scene might become a typical opening and the information would get passed over in a wide.

Actually, a bunch of INSERTS could be used or the items for closeup could be capitalized. The emphasis remains the same...

Quoted from JamminGirl Actually, a bunch of INSERTS could be used or the items for closeup could be capitalized. The emphasis remains the same...

Rather use caps than a bunch of inserts, which could become annoying.

Quoted from Scar Tissue Films There are some good arguments on both sides. There are very few absolutes and like Lakewood says, Camera Directions are part of the writers tool group and should be used if they would add to the story.

if they would add to the story are the operative words here.  If you have a scene where a character waits at a bus stop (where nothing significant happens), you shouldn't write that it's a long shot of Bob at a bus stop... or a bird's eye view of Bob standing at a bus stop.  OTOH, describing a bus pass in Bob's hand, from Bob's point of view invites you into Bob's head for a moment.  Of course, there should be a reason why he's looking at it.

Quoted from Scar Tissue Films I would say that in his example the Close On's help to set the scene. They are being used for a specific thematic purpose; To signpost the characters inner life, the fact that he's using medication and is reading all kinds of self help books.

I disagree with the CLOSE UP on the books.  By describing them as self-help books, you don't need to give the shot.  It's automatically assumed that it will be a CLOSE UP.  Otherwise, how would you show what kind of books they are.

Here's another example of a shot that's automatic:

FADE IN ON:

The North American continent.  The sky is cloud-free and brilliantly clear.  The coastlines are sharp, as if drawn by a very fine pen.

From this, it's safe to assume that it's a long shot from space.  There's no reason to mention 'from space we see...'



Phil

Phil, you reinforce a very valid point that I've tried to make several times.  There are things that are assumed, or are just common sense, both in screenwriting and communication of any kind.  If you give the title of a book, or the words on a card, than it has to be assumed that in order to see what they say, it will be a CU shot.  Just common sense to me.

Now, on the other hand, in your example, is there really any reason for the line, “The coastlines are sharp, as if drawn by a very fine pen.”?  I’d say definitely not.  Especially the “, as if drawn by a very fine pen.” part.

Know what I mean?

Maybe the pen reference wasn't the best but, hey, it was off the top of my head.  The point is that I indirectly gave a camera direction that flows with the story.


Phil

Quoted from Dreamscale Phil, you reinforce a very valid point that I've tried to make several times.  There are things that are assumed, or are just common sense, both in screenwriting and communication of any kind.  If you give the title of a book, or the words on a card, than it has to be assumed that in order to see what they say, it will be a CU shot.  Just common sense to me.

And that is exactly what Mystery Man means in his article, if you say that the clock shows it is 2.30pm then there is an assumption that the clock will be shown. It is up to the director to finally decide whether it is or not but if it is important he probably will. But there is no need whatsoever to describe exactly how that clock is to be filmed.  Writing the shots without directing the film is another skill to be learned as a screenwriter, and I really cannot think of any example of where a spec script would benefit from having a camera angle included within the action.

Of course many scripts are not spec scripts, many scripts that are available to read on SS are actually final drafts, often written in conjunction or even by the director and are much more of a shooting script and can be excused for containing direction. They after all are written to be filmed, a spec script is written to be read, two very different things altogether.

Well put, Giles!  I agree with you 100%.

And Phil, I was kind of kidding about that final phrase, as I knew you just threw it together.

Quoted from Murphy I really cannot think of any example of where a spec script would benefit from having a camera angle included within the action.

I can. But it’s admittedly not an easy thing to explain. Maybe that’s why you seldom see it explained. All I can say is that a good script has timing and pitch elements and sometimes it’s necessary to make the script work properly.

It’s a hard thing to qualify and I’m no good at explaining it but sometimes writing strictly by the “rules” just won’t produce the desired effect. Sometimes direction or an aside enhances a scene not just with meter but it sort of pitches the story as you go. It makes the read more enjoyable and sells the script.

I would also like to point out that it simply shouldn’t bother a reader to see these terms in and of themselves in a script. They shouldn’t take a reader out of the story. Not anymore than knowing a camera shot actors when you watch a movie at the theater.

Pro writers don’t break the “rules” because they can. They break them because they don’t acknowledge their existence. Their writing isn’t arbitrary. Pro writers understand the usefulness of these techniques. So do I. If people want to think I can’t write because I include a camera direction occasionally, all I can say is I’m in good company.


Breanne

Quoted from Breanne Mattson I would also like to point out that it simply shouldn’t bother a reader to see these terms in and of themselves in a script. They shouldn’t take a reader out of the story. Not anymore than knowing a camera shot actors when you watch a movie at the theater.

I'm usually annoyed when I see people complain that things like 'We see' takes them out of the story. Maybe someone should tell them they're not reading a novel, but something that an audience will actually see.