Quoted from Kamran Nikhad Phil you seriously remind me of the fonse in that picture. PHIL Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey.....

I think he was just spreading the word about the "Church of the Jesus-Phil".


Worship-o-mundo.

One year my wife's auntie gave me a packet of biscuits that had passed their expiration date.  

The worst Christmas I had was when I was ten. I went out for a ride on my new bike and when I came back home I walked in on my parents having a shag.   

My worst Christmas present was this really fine cologne my grandmother got me. I know, I know--not a bad gift at all...but I was freaking SEVEN when I got it! Why the fuck would a seven year-old be interested in cologne? All I wanted at the time were my toys and my videogames.

She's the classic weirdie granny, but I still love her

--Julio

My grandmother brought me a shirt back from Thailand one year. It was a counterfeit Adidas shirt with the second "D" missing. So, technically it was an Adias shirt.  Hideous colour as well, it was kind of a muddy red. Luckily it was a few sizes too small for me so I never had to wear it.


Matt.

these were all funny.  

Phife,
That Math book could net you some money. Seriously.
America's Funniest Home Videos wants videos of children opening up their presents on Christmas. Check out their website.
Since you have the video, why not copy it and send it in?
Your worst present could turn out to be one of the best gifts ever.  

Cindy

My work this year gave me a card which says "we donated your christmas present to charity, happy holidays"

Frankly, I'd like to see a receipt for this present going to charity.

And pants that would fit me 10 years ago...

While not a bad gift, one place I worked for (years ago) gave everyone Christmas bonuses....and they taxed it.  Nothing like receiving a bonus where state, federal and FICA were taken out.


Phil

I got a bottle a 5 dollar shampoo once when I was 14. I was so pissed I brought my knee to my grandma's jaw, knocking her out, and screamed: "So I have dandruff, do I???"

No, I'm just kidding. It wasn't shampoo, it was some kind of detergent or something...

Hey,

About three years ago my dad got me an lawn edger for Christmas.

That's probably the worst one I've ever gotten seriously as a present. But also, I've gotten, as jokes I presume, coal,  Broken glasses, and a can of mole chili sauce.

This year mainly cards. Really I'd rather have the money they used to pay for the cards then the well wishing delivery device.

sheepwalker

  

Quoted from Soap Hands my dad got me an lawn edger for Christmas.

Lawn edgers are among the coolest of the garden tools...It's a spinning blade of torment and death to ANYTHING that falls in it's path...Hope it was gas powered...To that lawn, you are Jason Voorhees!!!

Quoted from Death Monkey I got a bottle a 5 dollar shampoo once when I was 14. I was so pissed I brought my knee to my grandma's jaw, knocking her out, and screamed: "So I have dandruff, do I???" No, I'm just kidding. It wasn't shampoo, it was some kind of detergent or something...

I guess that was a hint. You or your clothes stink.