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I like the descriptions you wrote. They were a little flowery, but not overly flowery and I could see everything nicely.
I think you should write this one into a feature.
That way you can really get into who is who and why they are doing what they do. You could also create a nice twist at the end.
I'm not sure if I like the cop being in on it or not. It's kind of easy, but then again, maybe the cop and everyone else could be part of a cult of some kind. Not sure though, it ended too soon to actually find out what was really going on.
Nice job though with what you have here, but I'd like to see more.
Award winning screenwriter Available screenplays TINA DARLING - 114 page Comedy ONLY OSCAR KNOWS - 99 page Horror A SONG IN MY HEART - 94 page Drama HALLOWEEN GAMES - 105 page Drama
The Elevator Most Belonging To Alice - Semi Final Bluecat, Runner Up Nashville Inner Journey - Page Awards Finalist - Bluecat semi final Grieving Spell - winner - London Film Awards. Third - Honolulu Ultimate Weapon - Fresh Voices - second place IMDb link... http://www.imdb.com/name/nm7062725/?ref_=tt_ov_wr
I've only seen locations on one....so I'll believe it when I see it. People always talk...but when I see some results....then I'll believe ....lotta wanna be filmmakers out there. If/when I get something, I'll post it though...