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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Screenwriting Discussion    The 2020 Writers' Tournament  ›  Fallen Apples - WT3 Moderators: Mr. Blonde
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  Author    Fallen Apples - WT3  (currently 1433 views)
ajr
Posted: July 24th, 2020, 7:01am Report to Moderator
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Holy mackerel on this one...

I had to read it twice to figure out that the kids stowed away...

One that is once again ALL theme, however the last line about the mom saying the dad couldn't tell the kids apart? Undermines the entire thing. They are as different as can be. That's what nature vs. nurture is about. One is under the influence of the deviant father. He above anyone should know WHO that is.

And I'm struggling with any sort of justification for a mother killing her 11 year old son whose crime to this point is that he had a crappy, serial killing father. She is judge, jury and executioner, and despite the father's crimes, she'll still go to jail for shooting him instead of calling the police, and she'll do life for killing her own kid who hadn't committed a crime, and sweet lil' Ben will grow up in an orphanage.

Not sure this even nails the horror genre. We have a body, mutilated but alive. But we do not participate in any of the tension here. This is more of a thriller / drama.

That, and the fact that the father leaves the body out in the truck while they have dinner? A lot of things just didn't work for me here, I'm sorry to say.

AJR


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