This is gonna be a strange review, but I just wanted to acknowledge that I read this. Around page 40 I found myself skimming, partly because I wanted to get to the end and see what happens to Colin Cherry, and partly because I was beginning to feel overwhelmed with all the characters. That was a mistake because it threw off the flow. I'm gonna have to reread it another day when I've got more time and patience.
One thing's for sure, you've got a confident and unique voice. It deserves a second look. Kind of reminded me of Smokin' Aces and Shades Within.
PS - Check for typos. I spotted a few.