Quoted from Zack How did you "accidentally" get thrown into a fireplace!? Lol. Were you a little bit hammered?

It was by a huge grizzly bear that originally looked like an Indian.  I don't know why he came into my house, turned into a bear, and then threw me into the fireplace.

The whole thing was very odd.

English is capitalized.

Not a very promising start.

Quoted Text KITCHEN The kitchen is a disaster.

Redundant.

The priest is pretty random, I have to admit. This reads like an SNL sketch.

What the hell is gnurly?

Janet's possessed dialogue is way too over-the-top and cheesy. Sounds like something Rob Zombie would have written for his Halloween movies.

Quoted Text Now, where did I put that...aha!

Terrible line.

Ziploc, a trademark, should be capitalized.

I proudly use the word "fuck," but I think these characters are saying it too much, again like Rob Zombie's Halloween movies.

At this point I'm bored, tired and skimming. You lost me at Powhatan.

Jeff's right. None of this makes sense. The writing's okay, the story isn't. Not for me, I'm sorry to say. Good job on knocking out a script and entering.

Well, that went south fast. Before Janet and Brad know it, they’re hosts to a battle royale between a demon, Stryker, his evil helper, the Priest, and an Indian fighter (as in being one, not fighting them), Powhatan. Excellent!