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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Screenwriting Discussion    Screenwriting Class  ›  How do I describe this in proper format? Moderators: George Willson
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  Author    How do I describe this in proper format?  (currently 568 views)
Tinman
Posted: June 27th, 2006, 9:35pm Report to Moderator
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On a TV screen, someone gets to a DVD menu. He clicks "Bonus Features" and it gets him to another screen.

How would you put that in proper format? What do I put as a heading, since INT., EXT., and time of day are nonexistant

And if I want to quickly go back and forth between the TV screen and the room where the person clicking the remote, how would I write this?
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Balt
Posted: June 27th, 2006, 9:38pm Report to Moderator
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I'd probably do an INSERT. TV/DVD SCREEN --> Then describe what you want us to see on it. After you're done, slap down a BACK TO SCENE.

That's how I'd do it.
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dogglebe
Posted: June 27th, 2006, 9:41pm Report to Moderator
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If you're going back and forth between the telvisioin and tose watching it, you'd use INTERCUT, but that's a camera angle so you it sparingly.

You could just write what is scene on the screen, followed by what the watchers are doing, back to the screen, then the watchers, etc.


Phil
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Tinman
Posted: June 27th, 2006, 9:41pm Report to Moderator
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So if I start my script with this scene, I just write:


FADE IN:

INSERT. TV SCREEN

Text.

INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY


?
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dogglebe
Posted: June 27th, 2006, 9:50pm Report to Moderator
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Probably more like:

INT.  TELEVISION.

An old western movie is on, with INDIANS chasing lone horseman, BUCK MASTERS.

                          MASTERS
             (to horse)
        Giddap!  Giddap!

AMY and TODD (both 15) sit on an old couch, staring at the televisioin, glassy-eyed.

                          AMY
             (listless)
        Why are we watching this>

An Indian fires an arrow, hitting Masters in the back.  He grimaces in pain.

Todd takes a sip of his soda.

                         TODD
             (listless)
         Dunno.  What else you wanna do?

                         AMY
         Dunno.

Masters falls off his horse and rolls in the sand.

The Indians surround him on their horses.

Todd looks at Amy.

                         TODD
         You wanna make out?




Or something like that.


Phil

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Lon
Posted: June 27th, 2006, 10:02pm Report to Moderator
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Another way:

BOB and TOM wrestle with a remote control.

ON THE TV

The Lone Ranger pats Tonto's back.

LONE RANGER
Hey, Tonto, I ever tell you the one about the rattlesnake who bites a guy on the willie?

TONTO
Only about a million times, kemosabi...

BOB

Slaps Tom with the remote and renders him unconscious.  He turns to the TV, triumphant, and clicks a button on the remote.

ON THE TV

The channel changes.  Al Bundy tucks his hands into his pants.



Eh.  You get the idea.  It's just another way of instructing the reader's eye without adding a camera direction.
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Mr.Z
Posted: June 27th, 2006, 10:03pm Report to Moderator
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Inserts, back to scene's and/or any other camera directions are very frowned upon in spec scripts, specially those written by new writers. Just describe what happens in a clear and economical way.


Quoted Text
INT. TINMAN'S ROOM - NIGHT

A big TV screen shows the dvd menu of a porn movie; "Paramour's" written in fancy pink letters over two barely dressed cowgirls, along with other menu options.

Tinman points the remote control to the dvd player.

On the TV, the "Bonus Features" legend is highlighted; the screen changes and another legend appears: Commentary track by Robert G. Newcomer.



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George Willson
Posted: June 27th, 2006, 10:17pm Report to Moderator
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Hey, I have that DVD. It's the one with the extended ending in the deleted scenes showing quite graphically what happens to Gold Tooth and that the scream might not be of pain...he's smiling from what I can tell.

Sorry, off-topic. Won't happen again until the next time. I'm saying this to myself to ensure I keep me in line.


As for the question (so I address it), there are a million ways to format weird stuff, and as long as the story is the king and however you format it doesn't bog down the reader, any of these options will work just fine.


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