I think the VO is enough in the first one.

I also think you'd label the second, but Jeff (Dreamscale) is the go to man for formatting.

Quoted from Scar Tissue Films I think the VO is enough in the first one. I also think you'd label the second, but Jeff (Dreamscale) is the go to man for formatting.

Yeah, any and all Flashbacks need to be labeled as such.  Most Flashbacks are aways back in time, meaning everything in the scene, including the characters (what they look like, what they're wearing, etc) will be "different".

Using VO over a Flashback is fine and often done.  If the VO doesn't describe what's being shown, you're basically saying whoever is giving that VO is lying/can't be trusted/etc.

Remember, start with - "BEGIN FLASHBACK" (not in the Slug), and end with "END FLASHBACK".  Your Flashback can then carry over into multiple scenes/Slugs.

Quoted from Dreamscale Yeah, any and all Flashbacks need to be labeled as such.  Most Flashbacks are aways back in time, meaning everything in the scene, including the characters (what they look like, what they're wearing, etc) will be "different". Using VO over a Flashback is fine and often done.  If the VO doesn't describe what's being shown, you're basically saying whoever is giving that VO is lying/can't be trusted/etc. Remember, start with - "BEGIN FLASHBACK" (not in the Slug), and end with "END FLASHBACK".  Your Flashback can then carry over into multiple scenes/Slugs.

Got it. I wouldn't want to portray this character as a liar, but thanks for the info on that.

As for the full on flashback, I'd label it as such, but I wouldn't superimpose anything on the screen. Then the "back to present" tag would introduce the scene where the character says "that's about it." or something along those lines.

One of the best films too use necessary exposition in a very good way os the first Terminator.

All the explanation that Kyle gives to Sarah about the future, who she is, etc,is done while the Terminator is chasing them. In the stolen car he tells her while he's hot wiring it, while they are driving. It still woulda been good if they were hidden somewhere an dhe tells it all but James Cameron makes it flow as there's all this action going on. His original script is a great read and a good example of writing.

But i've always laughed at some of Kyle's dialogue - he barks out stuff as if she would know what he's talking about 'you've been targeted for termination' and he gives the model number of the Terminator etc. That comes out as silly to me as Sarah has NFBI what is happening lol

Quoted from Female Gaze I need a break from this site. I wish I had never done the OWC and just kept to myself like I had been doing all year.

Don't take it to heart Ashlie, this site, like most forums, is full of opinionated peeps! Doesn't necessarily make any of them right

And on SS you have a bunch of aspiring screenwriters who all have their own views on structure, formatting, dialogue etc... but most (there are exceptions) are writers, not producers... and it's producers who your script is for really.

Use the bits that you think help you/your script and ignore the rest!

Quoted from stevie One of the best films too use necessary exposition in a very good way os the first Terminator. All the explanation that Kyle gives to Sarah about the future, who she is, etc,is done while the Terminator is chasing them. In the stolen car he tells her while he's hot wiring it, while they are driving. It still woulda been good if they were hidden somewhere an dhe tells it all but James Cameron makes it flow as there's all this action going on. His original script is a great read and a good example of writing. But i've always laughed at some of Kyle's dialogue - he barks out stuff as if she would know what he's talking about 'you've been targeted for termination' and he gives the model number of the Terminator etc. That comes out as silly to me as Sarah has NFBI what is happening lol

I guess the obvious info-dump was hidden by all of the action. But yea, no one really complains about that.

I do find it hilarious that Sarah just kind of goes with it.

Quoted from Steven I guess the obvious info-dump was hidden by all of the action. But yea, no one really complains about that.

That's called The Pope In The Pool. Whenever you need to have a lot of exposition, give it to the audience while giving them something visually interesting to destract them from realizing the info dump.  

1.Interesting Logline.
2. Description that sets tone as well as place.
3. Natural - realistic dialogue
4. Pace that balances with the story being told

Quoted from eldave1 1.Interesting Logline. 2. Description that sets tone as well as place. 3. Natural - realistic dialogue 4. Pace that balances with the story being told

Dave, #4 stands out to me. Care to further elaborate? So, are you saying that the 3 act structure should flow seamlessly together, almost as though the audience has no clue of the transition?

Quoted from TonyDionisio Dave, #4 stands out to me. Care to further elaborate? So, are you saying that the 3 act structure should flow seamlessly together, almost as though the audience has no clue of the transition?

That - and a little more. There are really two things:

Pace based on what's happening:

What I saying is that I don't mind slow pace if the story warrants it. So, let's say we open with a mother tackled with the job of telling her son that his father just died in a car accident. I want some emotion, nuance, careful thinking here. I want more then just a line of dialogue to get me to feel the heartache. I want the scene to be delicious for lack of a better term - something to savor.

Conversely, if the scene opens with two blokes at a coffee shop talking about going to that
Dad's funeral - I want to be in and out of the scene as quickly as possible.

2. Pace commensurate with only telling or showing me things I really need to know.

I've read several otherwise well written scripts that get bogged down in transitional based details. e.g., Protag wakes up at his house, doesn't bother to shave that day, gets in his car, drives down the freeway, exits his car, walks towards a gathering of people around a grave. It could be written in just a stellar fashion other than I want it to start with an unhaven man at the grave site.

Hope this helps clarify.

Indeed. Kinda like driving a 5 speed manual transmission.

I love horror, mostly the slasher subgenre. When reading a horror/slasher I need an interesting antagonist to be created within the first pages. My shallow two cents.

~Zack~

Quoted from Zack I love horror, mostly the slasher subgenre. When reading a horror/slasher I need an interesting antagonist to be created within the first pages. My shallow two cents. ~Zack~

seems almost ironic to me, due to the fact that mostly every horror amateur script starts out the same predictable way - set up an ordinary person about to do something with their friends that they really don't want to do (peer pressure) or a stock character running for their life about to die who means nothing at all to the script.

Hey all, new here. This isy second post.
I try and give the reader a sense of the protagonist's world from page one. What the conflict is or a sense of the conflict.
The earlier beats happen in a script, the better.