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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Action / Adventure Scripts  ›  Sadie The Maker - WT
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  Author    Sadie The Maker - WT  (currently 1858 views)
ajr
Posted: March 23rd, 2018, 11:11am Report to Moderator
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This is mine, thanks to everyone who read and commented.

I see the V.O.'s were pretty polarizing. I didn't want to write dialogue. And I felt that this was the best way to set up the world and have the narrative flow properly.

I have seen probably less than 10 superhero movies in my life, so I was definitely out of my element. I along with my competitor opted for someone with superpowers rather than a true superhero, though I hedged my bet a bit by throwing Hercules in there. (0:

I did it primarily so that it wouldn't be a piece of fan fiction. Can't write Thor into the script if you don't own the rights to Thor.

Someone said Terminator influenced, sorry to say no. Sadie sounded like Satan, so... it grew from there. Any resemblance to existing fantasy genres is purely coincidental. As most of the longtime regulars know, I usually write comedy / dramas and don't really have a knowledge base in horror or fantasy.

Not sure about formatting errors, if anyone can illuminate specifically I'd appreciate it. Unfortunately my software uses a colon after FADE OUT and I didn't catch it. For slugs, I believe the year is proper at the end, didn't want it to appear on the screen since it was only to orient the reader so I didn't use SUPER.

Again, thanks to all. This was hard, and my competition was very worthy.


Click HERE to read JOHN LENNON'S HEAVEN https://preview.tinyurl.com/John-Lennon-s-Heaven-110-pgs/
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Dustin
Posted: March 23rd, 2018, 11:24am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


Action speaks louder...

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Some nice visual writing. Shitty subject matter. Not sure how I'd have twisted the same parameters into something that makes worldly sense, or even if I could.


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DanC
Posted: March 24th, 2018, 11:33am Report to Moderator
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Killing villains since 1980!

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You can use Thor.  Yes, Marvel owns the rights to the MARVEL version of him.  You can use the version of him that gets taught in school.

BTW Hercules is also in the Marvel universe.

I wish you had asked me.  I could have told you that.

Dan


Please read my scripts:
http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-series/m-1427564706/

I'm interested in reading animation, horror, sci fy, suspense, fantasy, and anything that is good.  I enjoy writing the same.  Looking to team with anyone!

Thanks
Dan
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ajr
Posted: March 24th, 2018, 1:47pm Report to Moderator
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Makes sense. Thor was a myth before he was a superhero. Same with Hercules. God I hate superhero movies... I'd rather watch someone make an omelet.


Click HERE to read JOHN LENNON'S HEAVEN https://preview.tinyurl.com/John-Lennon-s-Heaven-110-pgs/
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DanC
Posted: March 24th, 2018, 2:18pm Report to Moderator
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Thor was more than a myth, he was worshipped as a God.  And there have been fun adaptations from time to time, like Star Gate.

Dan


Please read my scripts:
http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-series/m-1427564706/

I'm interested in reading animation, horror, sci fy, suspense, fantasy, and anything that is good.  I enjoy writing the same.  Looking to team with anyone!

Thanks
Dan
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FrankM
Posted: March 24th, 2018, 4:03pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from DanC
And there have been fun adaptations from time to time, like Star Gate.

Dan


Are you trying to tell me that Stargate SG-1 was not a documentary?!


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ScottM
Posted: March 25th, 2018, 8:38pm Report to Moderator
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Hi ajr,

Really enjoyed that. Considering you say you are not comfortable with the subject matter I think you handled it very well.

I do agree it is very heavy on the voice overs but I don't personally think it detracted from the story.

It's a smart idea set in a well made world.


Any thoughts on my work in progress would be appreciated.

The Digger

http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?m-1521688645/s-0/#num2
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ajr
Posted: May 20th, 2018, 9:16am Report to Moderator
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Thanks for the read and the kind words Scott M, never got to thank you on this.

Sorry for bumping this during the OWC but Don was kind enough to post the rewrite.

Expanded a bit and incorporated some of the very helpful suggestions.

Thanks again to all who read and commented.

AJR


Click HERE to read JOHN LENNON'S HEAVEN https://preview.tinyurl.com/John-Lennon-s-Heaven-110-pgs/
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