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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Drama Scripts  ›  Shooting
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Posted: March 27th, 2019, 3:57pm Report to Moderator

So, what are you writing?

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Shooting by Isaac Sweeney - Short, Drama, Urban - Will Angel choose the future he wants or the revenge his family deserves? 15 pages

Screenplay festival live reading (YouTube) - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

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Posted: March 29th, 2019, 6:23pm Report to Moderator

Southern California
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There were a lot of formatting issues, but they can easily be remedied.

There wasn't a lot new here.  It had a Boyz N The Hood feel to it, but it lacked any real punch.  I do like the fact that Angel had a choice at the end, which makes a film.  Choice.  

The characters have to make a choice.  I have to feel their dilemma.  Their struggle.  I have to feel they're torn between "right" and "wrong".

You alluded to that but I didn't really subscribe to the truth of it all.  It felt forced.

If you're around, Isaac, I'll go into detail on what I'm talking about.

Thanks for the read.


Read my scripts here:
THE BRIDGE 8pg-Horror
SCHEISSE 6pg-Horror/Comedy
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