It's good. Nice gritty revenge flick. Could be polished up a bit. The flashback scene was a bit confusing but overall could understand what was happening. Came off as action to me.

Quoted from Arundel It's good. Nice gritty revenge flick. Could be polished up a bit. The flashback scene was a bit confusing but overall could understand what was happening. Came off as action to me.

Thanks for taking a look!  Did the font look ok? When I click on the link to bring it up it looks different than if I open it thru my laptop.

Appreciate the feedback!

Enjoyed the read. really liked it.

Font was a little...different? I don't know how to describe it.

Just one thing: If you're going to describe one mask, you should the other too. The first part of that description too needs an 's' on the end to plural the masks. Also, I could be wrong (I'm like 90% sure) but I think I heard never use an exclamation point in action text. Dialogue is fine, but I think it's a no-no elsewhere.

Also:
PASTOR GRAHAM (to the ladies) That'll be enough. Obviously they are to dumb to realize what's happening.

Wrong to there, just toss in an extra o!

Keep at it, I enjoyed it!

Quoted from MikeK Enjoyed the read. really liked it. Font was a little...different? I don't know how to describe it. Just one thing: If you're going to describe one mask, you should the other too. The first part of that description too needs an 's' on the end to plural the masks. Also, I could be wrong (I'm like 90% sure) but I think I heard never use an exclamation point in action text. Dialogue is fine, but I think it's a no-no elsewhere. Also: PASTOR GRAHAM (to the ladies) That'll be enough. Obviously they are to dumb to realize what's happening. Wrong to there, just toss in an extra o! Keep at it, I enjoyed it!

Thanks for the read!  Appreciate the info!  Thanks for pointing out the grammar errors. That’s one thing I really need to work on amongst everything else. It’s one thing to write a bad story , it’s another to write bad, a bad story. I think I said that right lol.  

Quoted from Kevin_L Did the font look ok?

Font style was a bit different but still resembled Courier Script.

One last thing. Best to not include specific songs (i.e. Highway to Hell). You can't guarantee it will be used. Good to listen to a song for inspiration or to get themes or moods though.