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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Comedy Scripts  ›  How My Boyfriend Ruined My Date
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  Author    How My Boyfriend Ruined My Date  (currently 213 views)
Posted: June 30th, 2019, 6:35am Report to Moderator

So, what are you writing?

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How my boyfriend ruined my date by Mica - Short, Comedy - A new friendship is formed, when a woman is caught on a date by her boyfriend. 6 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

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Posted: July 22nd, 2019, 7:19pm Report to Moderator

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You've got the bones here for something good, it just needs some proofreading and dialogue tightening. I genuinely chuckled (in a good way) with some of the lines. You've got a knack for one-liners. Keep at it.
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Posted: July 22nd, 2019, 10:15pm Report to Moderator
Been around a while

Las Vegas, Nevada
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Some of the dialog is funny, just needs to be better written. The logline is confusing, but after reading the script it makes a bit of sense. Again, just check some grammar.
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