Glitter and Glow by Theodore - A magical ornament serves as a reminder of loved ones.  Short, Drama

A little dialogue/expositional heavy but that's been picky as I really liked this one.

Great job

Okay - last one for today.  Need to take a break.

Writing is fine - parameters clearly met - kudos on that.

Nice warm little story - nothing grand, but heartfelt - I enjoyed it.

Neat little story with a cool use of the ornament. Cant add much more as the writing and feel were spot on.  

As writers our job is to pull the the reader in and inspire them to read more. And you've done that here. It's nicely written, straight forward but effective. Cute little story you have on your hands here, one of my favorites... now I just have to find the other one I'm looking for. Best of Irish luck. -A

It's lovely for sure, but...

It's just a bit light on conflict/escalation of any real plot mid-point for me.

I think the emotional payoff would work way better if Emma's loss is felt a bit more rather than played down, to maximise your denouement and the 'glow'.

Of course you want to be wary of skirting melodrama but that revelation needed a bit more oomph for me.

And maybe make it Emma's parents instead of grandparents? I realise Grandpa is more visual as an older more Santa-type, but an alternative could be widower Dad dressed as Santa telling the story of losing his wife, Emma's Mum.

Hey, everyone's a critic.
Just my thoughts.
Parameters met. Nice job.

Nice, simple and heartfelt.

Nothing more to say apart from well done.

-Mark

This is a nice, sweet script. Very successful. Writing is solid. Not much I would change on this one.

"dozens of twinkling white lights" - Dozens?  Is this a tiny tree or what?  How about hundreds?  Thousands?

Well done with the poem.

EXCELLENT!  BRAVO!

Very, very touching, and very well done.

I think the structure could be tweaked just a bit, but maybe it's just fine as it is.  This delivers the goods and I applaud the effort.

****1/2

Writer,

This one's up there. A little sappy, yes, but I liked it. Flowed well, and read quick. Still, I feel something is missing here. I think the reveal at the end needs to be presented in a more striking manner than you have it. It reads a little matter-of-factly, like we knew this was going to happen all along.

Did the look on Emma's face really suggest Grandpa's passing was recent? How does one express that with a look?

Anyway, that's minor. Good job!

Steve

Hello writer

Finally a Christmas story.

The wonderful writing pulled me right in and didn't let go, the story seemed a bit aimless for a while but came together with a more than satisfying ending complete with Christmas Magic.

Deffo one of the better entries.

Well done and Happy Holidays

This was my last one a nice one to end with. Very sweet and heartfelt. Parameters met and easily filmed. Although very OTN, not sure how else to communicate the story other than just telling us the story. The only visual props are the couple ornaments.

Good job, writer. A nice last read.

What a nice story.

I had to re-read the ending. I missed the part where the grandmother's face was still on it along with the grandfather's face. I at first thought the one face replaced the other and was going to comment on it.

The writing was well done. Was a speedy read for me.

Story works too, fits perfectly within the 6 page limit.

Good work.

Top three for me~

Not much else to say; a bit predictable, but very solid. Could perhaps use more spicing up for the sake of memorability?

Great work.