Quoted from DustinBowcot Not to be avoided... just not used all the time. Most of the time you will write the character name first. Just occasionally flip things around.

Funny but I actually do the oposite. Can be a being international thing - I never start with the name. Then I go through and change the sentences to start with the character.

Like today I was writing about a piano player. She's on stage playing her piece. Then she goes down. Another student climbs the stage and starts playing. So I wanted the other student to be seen and heard from my main character's POV. And I changed all the sentences that are about another student to "Anna watches..." "Anna listens" - because it's from her POV. What do I do now? Change back?

Quoted from DustinBowcot Yeah in regard to ly adverbs I use them all the time. Just as Reef said, be careful when you do. I learned that from writing prose, but it works just as well with screenplays... they do say that in every novel you should only see one 'ly' adverb every two pages or so. However, it is possible to write without them altogether. Just go easy on them.

I kind of feel like an idiot for asking this, but what's prose again? It's that fancy ass writing style, right? Sort of like, the way a novel is written as opposed to a screenplay, so loads of adverbs and adjectives ect, heavy description, unfilmables ect.

I haven't really dabbled in any other writing, just screenplays, and lets just say I haven't done much in the way of higher learning when it comes to creative writing.

It's how most screenwriters refer to novelists, so I use it. Nothing fancy about novel writing. Well, it depends... but there are rules in that too about overwriting.

Where did you learn how to write Dustin? Did you get some higher qualifications ect.? Or are you self-taught?

Self taught. I read loads and loads. I left school at 13, so haven't got any qualifications at all.

Damn, pretty impressive if you ain't got no formal education, just goes to show...

Quoted from khamanna Funny but I actually do the oposite. Can be a being international thing - I never start with the name. Then I go through and change the sentences to start with the character. Like today I was writing about a piano player. She's on stage playing her piece. Then she goes down. Another student climbs the stage and starts playing. So I wanted the other student to be seen and heard from my main character's POV. And I changed all the sentences that are about another student to "Anna watches..." "Anna listens" - because it's from her POV. What do I do now? Change back?

Oh nah, it ain't nothing like that, what you've done is perfectly acceptable and useful when you're in a P.O.V.  This is more of a personal niggle I have at the moment.

It's a great question, Max, and also something that is very prevalent in scripts that have been written rather quickly.

In action heavy scenes, it's tough to do away with.

When a writer tries to rework lines, looking to change them up, the result is often poorly constructed, awkward sentences.

There are ways to make it seem less obvious.

Breaking up action lines with dialogue helps.  Or inserting lines that don't necessarily have to do with the actual action taking place....like nature, the surroundings, something of that "nature", but then again, this packs on extra lines, so it's a double edged sword.

It's good to be cognisant of it, and when you get down to certain spots that need attention, you'll be able to do away with a few lines here and there that start the same way, but in the end, don't lsoe too much sleep over it.  

IMO there are a ton of options on how to flip sentences around and a lot of them work case by case and based on the writing style.

Although, here are two that I like, maybe they'll be of use to you:

Add description which would still be important to the plot

Instead of "Guy reaches for the beer.", "Hands shaking, Guy reaches for the beer."

Look at the order of things happening or what we would see first.

Instead of "Guy stirs in his sleep as the band starts playing.", "The band starts playing, Guy stirs in his sleep."

Instead of "Guy screams as the cockroach walks over his feet.", "A cockroach walks over Guy's feet, he screams."

None of the above examples are meant to be wrong of course, just in the case for when you want to swap it around.

I agree that it's useful to look out for overdoing it and creating weird sentences, which will be noticed much more than repetition of names or gender pronouns.

Not to cause an uproar, but DS's examples are actually perfect examples of what I said -

"When a writer tries to rework lines, looking to change them up, the result is often poorly constructed, awkward sentences."

That's what these examples are, sorry to say.

Quoted from Dreamscale Not to cause an uproar, but DS's examples are actually perfect examples of what I said - "When a writer tries to rework lines, looking to change them up, the result is often poorly constructed, awkward sentences." That's what these examples are, sorry to say.

If the last one was in two sentences tho.

A cockroach scutters over Guy's feet.  He SCREAMS at the top of his lungs.

Still not as good as the sentence starting with Guy, imo, but passable I think.



I would say that one is alright, but maybe not the hands shaking one.

Well, the actual issue doesn't just pertain to starting the sentence with the person's name.  It also is the same thing when you use he or she.

Basically, it's writing in a very simple sentence structure -

Character A does this.

Character B does that.

Etc, etc, etc...

That's the way I write, lol.

Trust me, if I try and go beyond that I'll fuck it all up completely.

So I'd write something like...

Guy recoils in horror as he spots a cockroach scuttering across the floor.  He unleashes a rip-roaring scream.

That's the best I can do, if I follow it up with...

His body contorts violently as he collapses to the ground, crying like a baby.

That's kind of, I dunno, I can't judge my own writing really.

Nothing wrong with that...maybe a little overwriting, but structurely, it's fine.

The question was how do writers get over the repetitive feel of that structure.

The answer is that it's difficult to and when most try, the outcome is worse, because it reads awkwardly.

Quoted from Dreamscale Nothing wrong with that...maybe a little overwriting, but structurely, it's fine. The question was how do writers get over the repetitive feel of that structure. The answer is that it's difficult to and when most try, the outcome is worse, because it reads awkwardly.

This is why I write on a level, instead of getting above my station, but then it's like... how do I improve if I don't take the risk with my writing?

I keep my shit real simple, very simple sentences that describe actions, emotions ect.  I feel as if, it's more acceptable to do that with a screenplay because it's visuals and character cues.



Some people have the gift I guess, others have to try very hard to learn.

I kind of hate repeating "as he/ or as she", how many times can you use that before someone just goes "fuck that, this dude doesn't know how to write this any other way" sort of thing.

Guy collapses as he spots a cockroach.  His body contorts as he falls back.

I hate repeating shit but it's like, do I have to worry all that much? To me, that repetition annoys me, and it will probably annoy others seeing it repeated as well, so I dunno.