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Multi-level location formatting question (currently 259 views) |
Hallucigenia |
Posted: November 13th, 2022, 10:00pm |
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Posts34 Posts Per Day 0.06 |
I have a character that is physically in a location, but is mentally somewhere else.
In the physical "reality" the character is performing actions.
In the mental "reality" she is interacting with another person in that mental "reality".
There is no dialog in the physical reality. I wrote the scene based in the mental reality and have written the physical reality as Shots in the scene as that was the most straight forward way to go about it.
However, I've got a scene I haven't written yet where there is interaction and dialog in both the physical and mental realities that is all taking place at the same time. Stacking the scene separately won't work as some back and forth between the physical and mental realities will take place.
I'm looking for the optimum formatting method. The best idea I've had so far is really short scenes going back and forth. Is there a better way? |
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LC |
Posted: November 13th, 2022, 11:37pm |
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Administrator
LocationThe Great Southern Land Posts7642 Posts Per Day 1.34 |
I really think you need to post an example.
You can employ lots of different methods - split scenes or imaginary scenes playing out in a character's head or for example - alternative realities, Intercuts, inner dialogue, stream of consciousness, split screen/dual dialogue, all contrary to action taking place, but more info is needed imho, for clarity. |
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Reply: 1 - 12 |
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Hallucigenia |
Posted: November 14th, 2022, 12:17am |
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Posts34 Posts Per Day 0.06 |
Sure thing. Here is a sample of bogus script formatted in the same way I wrote the scene:
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INT. MENTAL REALITY
Liberty stares at Jesus the Barbarian, unable to look away. Jesus the Barbarian dances.
JESUS THE BARBARIAN I am speaking now.
Jesus the Barbarian leans in close to Liberty to scare her. Liberty tries to block him with her arm.
LIBERTY IN THE PHYSICAL WORLD: LIBERTY'S ARM JERKS.
JESUS THE BARBARIAN Do you imagine that will stop me?
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For the shits in the script I wrote the "LIBERTY IN THE PHYSICAL WORLD:" on each shot for clarity.
That works alright, but not if there is a lot of back-n-forth between the mental reality and the physical reality. Especially if there is dialog in the physical world. |
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Reply: 2 - 12 |
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Matthew Taylor |
Posted: November 14th, 2022, 4:30am |
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January Project Group
LocationShakespeare's county Posts1770 Posts Per Day 0.87 |
The main aim is to make it as clear and succinct as possible. "LIBERTY IN THE PHYSICAL WORLD" seems cumbersome to me, she must actually be in a location in the physical world, so why not use that? E.g HOSPITAL WARD Once both locations have been set up with full sluglines, I would use mini slugs to cut between the two.
Quoted Text MENTAL REALITY
Liberty stares at Jesus the Barbarian, unable to look away. Jesus the Barbarian dances.
JESUS THE BARBARIAN I am speaking now.
Jesus the Barbarian leans in close to Liberty to scare her. Liberty tries to block him with her arm.
HOSPITAL WARD
Liberty's arm jerks.
MENTAL REALITY
JESUS THE BARBARIAN Do you imagine that will stop me? |
Then you can add dialogue into both locations without issue. Is "Mental reality" an oxymoron? personally, I would change "Reality" to something else. |
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42.2
Two steps to writing a good screenplay: 1) Write a bad one 2) Fix it |
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Reply: 3 - 12 |
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Hallucigenia |
Posted: November 14th, 2022, 5:03am |
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Posts34 Posts Per Day 0.06 |
Hmm. I'll try it, but it seems awkward somehow. Awkward, but workable. It is just a "short scene" methodology.
Mental reality is an oxymoron, but that's fine as it's only an example. |
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Reply: 4 - 12 |
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LC |
Posted: November 14th, 2022, 5:10am |
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Administrator
LocationThe Great Southern Land Posts7642 Posts Per Day 1.34 |
I don't know... 'Mental reality' doesn't seem apt for a slugline. A slugline is a set up for a location in which to film. Are we inside his brain? Inside a brain as SFX could be. Is that really what it is? I'm a bit confused. |
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Reply: 5 - 12 |
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Hallucigenia |
Posted: November 14th, 2022, 5:50am |
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Posts34 Posts Per Day 0.06 |
"Mental Reality" was only used for the example formatting. Likewise, Jesus the Barbarian and Liberty were made up for the example. |
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Reply: 6 - 12 |
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AlsoBen |
Posted: November 14th, 2022, 6:00am |
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Been Around
LocationAustralia Posts728 Posts Per Day 0.16 |
You've overcomplicated it. Just write the closest approximation of the actual location. You don't need to specify in the slugline which is real and which is internal or imagined. The reader should figure out from context clues just like the viewer.
Eg. if he is in his bedroom in reality, that's a normal slug obviously. And then when imagines he's in his mother's womb (or whatever), just write - INT. WOMB " or "INT. VELVEETA'S UTERUS" |
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Reply: 7 - 12 |
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Matthew Taylor |
Posted: November 14th, 2022, 6:01am |
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January Project Group
LocationShakespeare's county Posts1770 Posts Per Day 0.87 |
Hmm. I'll try it, but it seems awkward somehow. Awkward, but workable. It is just a "short scene" methodology.
Mental reality is an oxymoron, but that's fine as it's only an example. |
Fair enough. If you are only showing quick action in the reality part of the scene, then your original example seems clear enough. Similar to this under the "Doing Less" headline https://johnaugust.com/2015/short-cut-aways-and-the-value-of-back-toIf you wanted to add dialogue then I would go for the short scenes or possibly intercut. |
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42.2
Two steps to writing a good screenplay: 1) Write a bad one 2) Fix it |
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Reply: 8 - 12 |
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Hallucigenia |
Posted: November 14th, 2022, 6:31am |
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Posts34 Posts Per Day 0.06 |
I think August's advice is perfect in this situation. Thank you. |
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Reply: 9 - 12 |
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eldave1 |
Posted: November 14th, 2022, 12:39pm |
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January Project Group
LocationSouthern California Posts6874 Posts Per Day 1.93 |
Not sure if this will help you or not. Anyway - I wrote a feature that bounced back and forth between the real world and a VR world (like yours - the events were happening at the same time). Maybe the formatting I used will help you out - just blow through the first ten pages (link follows) and see if that is something format wise that you can use. https://www.simplyscripts.com/scripts/DarkWorld.pdf |
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Reply: 10 - 12 |
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Hallucigenia |
Posted: November 15th, 2022, 8:26pm |
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Posts34 Posts Per Day 0.06 |
Eldave1, in the end I've gone your route. It's simple and clear. |
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Reply: 11 - 12 |
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eldave1 |
Posted: November 16th, 2022, 12:16pm |
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January Project Group
LocationSouthern California Posts6874 Posts Per Day 1.93 |
Eldave1, in the end I've gone your route. It's simple and clear. |
Glad it helped |
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