All screenplays on the simplyscripts.com and simplyscripts.net domain are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved. This screenplaymay not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.
Hi Steve Just finished A Mothers Love and I have to say I didn't care for it. While your writing was skillful and the dialouge good I just found the characters unbelievable. Louise seems to sadistic and wise for a girl of her age. Perhaps some background into some tragedy that occured prior would help. I found Steve to be a weak man even in the face of his loss. He boardered on retarded to me. While I don't mind suspending disbelief I as the reader/watcher would appreciate a little help in the suspension. This could possibly work as a feature with more room to create a good back story for Louise and maybe make her a little more older. I like your dialouge a lot and look forward to future projects.
The car crash and losing her mother was supposed to be the trauma. Steve is supposed to a little thick, retarded's a bit strong lol, he's a decent guy deep down.
You hear of child geniuses, I guess Louise is one too but in a very particular field lol. I understand what you mean by the suspension of disbelief though and will look into that for the feature. I imagine it will be an entirely different script.
Just got done with this, I thought overall It was quite good.
The thing I enjoyed most about this was your actual writing, to be honest I probably enjoyed it more than the story itself. Your descriptions and dialogue were great in this!
haha Louise is some little girl! While, I found it quite funny how evil and calculated she was, I still found it hard to believe that a little girl could behave in this way, without dropping any kind of hints that she is insane.(Maybe you could add a couple of flashbacks from over the course of the year following the accident, which could show her building up to being this way!?)
Also, maybe it would be better if Louise was a couple of years older, then I think it becomes easier to believe that maybe a 10 year old would be more resentful and possibly act in this way. For me anyway haha!
Other than that, I really didn't have any problem with this at all. It was a quick and funny read!
Yeah, I didn't really make it very believable haha but that was deliberate. As said above, this is another one that is going into the 'expand into feature' pile and it will most likely be a very different script.
Just read this script and thought it was great. I thought the beginning was slow and the ending strong. Very enjoyable. If you're going to do this as a feature as you said up top. Keep the humour by all means. It's the strongest part. And I see a little of Chris Morris in you.
After watching a Chris Morris comedy in the UK, I think we're all desensitised to the extremes that life throws at us. Alot more than the rest of the world.
I will have to look up my Jam DVD and hunt out that sketch you mention. I always remembered the doctor sketches the parent sketch the most.
After watching a Chris Morris comedy in the UK, I think we're all desensitised to the extremes that life throws at us. Alot more than the rest of the world.
I will have to look up my Jam DVD and hunt out that sketch you mention. I always remembered the doctor sketches the parent sketch the most.
My only qualm would be the name of the script.
Morris is a genius man. What he did with The Day Today and Brass Eye was just show up the media and these media/attention grabbing celebrities for what they really are. People who will say and do anything just to look good in front of a camera. The amount of people who sued or threatened to sue shows that up lol.