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I've always been a fan of One Republic. Good song choice. I thought you painted a vivid picture of how something we take for granted can be a great joy to others. I also thought it was clever to have the guard sing and dance. They are stuck in there with them for long hours at a time. Using the lyrics in the dialogue worked well. Good job.
Congratulations on coming up with a remarkable, original idea. It would be so great to watch this on film. This is definitely in the running for the top spot. The only small suggestion I have would be to give Ethan more time in the prison. After just one day, he probably wouldn't be so overjoyed to see the sun. After a month or a year, things would be different.
Some teeny logic issues aside, which didn't bother me btw... Great job, Paul!
Thanks. Yeah, I chose to ignore a few things...especially knowing this really can't get made. Wrote it for the big fun of it all. In my head, it's even bigger than on the page. You really should see it!!! The choreography is amazing.
PaulKWrites.com
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Many shorts available for production: comedy, thriller, drama, light horror