Dr. Who? Episode One: The Last Minute Save by Ex-Ray - Drama ensues when a world renowned medical expert brings his expertise to a small town hospital.  Short, Comedy

An Abbott and Costello skit cleverly hidden with an episode of Doc Martin.  I loved it.

This was interesting to say the least.

I saw what you were trying to do, but this read more as a parody than anything. It was like taking the cliché of an over-worked drama and poking fun at it, instead of taking it and putting a unique twist on it.

While it would be a funny skit, and it had me smiling at parts due to the sheer ridiculousness of everything, this one fell short in my book.

I wanted to enjoy it. Maybe I will after I sit on it for a bit and re-read it. I get what you were trying to do, but it's as if you were making fun of the cliché, rather than taking your own spin on it.

Sean

I was reading this straight to begin with and then it twigged what was going on. A bit of a slow burn to start with but then I laughed out loud.

You nailed every cliché of every TV Medical Drama ever (except maybe the handsome Dr making out with the adorable Nurse in the Supply room).

No easy task making me laugh at a script, but this was really really funny.

I will say this needs a better title. I thought this was going to be a Dr Who send-up which made me think: meh.  

Excellent job, Writer!
You tickled my funny-bone.

Not familiar with Dr. Who (sorry), so I was happy to find out this really didn't have anything to do with it. This was silly in all the right ways for me. Fun send up of medical drama tropes. Put a smile on my face!

This was a fun bit o’ slapstick, à la every Leslie Nielsen movie. Not a bad thing by any stretch of the imagination, it’s probably one of my favorite genres, crude or slapstick humor that is. Maybe that’s why I’m addicted to Family Guy  

The ‘last minute save’ is fun angle to poke fun at because it happens so often.

Mind you, if I was hung up in some ICU with a rare incurable situation, in the middle of Small-ville, No-where-land, with a bunch of local doctors sitting around scratching their heads as to what’s ailing me, and then some hot-shot genius who’s the only person on the face of the planet who knows how to cure my incurable situation flies in from Big-town, Better-than-everyone-land to save my life… bring it! lol.

This also reminds me of another cliché that drives me nuts: the one where a small town, or outer community is held hostage by some off the wall crime spree, and then the Feds show up to save the day and crack the case, so to speak.

You know the one, where a group of wet behind the ears, fresh out of academy agents show up like they’re this omnipotent force to be reckoned with and treat all the locals as if everyone’s mildly retarded, simply because they’re a Federal Agent and got a passing grade in Criminal Psychology… oooohhh!

Anywho, this was an easy to read and clever take on the OWC theme that had me LOLing (if that’s a word, meme, emoji) in several places. Best of luck.

Ahoy Ex-ray-- the more I read this the more I like it. The best word I can think of to describe it is "lively." LMAO. I see the tongue in cheekiness of it all.  Some of the dialogue was funny to me. The title almost feels like a 'Red Herring." Overall, Badda Bing Badda boom... yea, this is hilarious. And memorable. And, yeah... It's wild, but I like that. Great job! -Andrea

Writer,

I could be wrong, but it seems like you were rushing here. You had some good element for comedy, though. Name confusion, outlandish diagnoses, etc. Very Abbot and Costello. But I think you played it all way too safe. Personally, I think good comedy needs an edge. If Courtney had protested Dr Hu’s potential diagnosis, and then he threw her under the knife any way, then maybe you have something. Who knows? Certainly not me. Overall, you had a really good premise but the execution didn’t live up to it.

Steve

I think I would have liked this more if you didn't do such a good job of reminding me about how much I can't stand Dr. House. Otherwise, I get the impression that this was easy for you to write and that it may have practically written itself. The jokes just roll out of the dialog with a comedic awkwardness that reminded me of The Room by Tommy Wiseau. The big difference is that you were doing it to be intentionally funny.

OH! I am a born again Dr Who obsessive since the new series started, some excellent episodes in the new series!

Right, this should be fun!



It genuinely isn't that Dr Who. it's Dr Hu.

Ah well.

But for what it is it is a very well-observed medical drama with almost all known medical cliches included (I missed the implied relationship between Dr and Nurse?).

Made me chuckle in a couple of places too, and I don't really do coemedy - well done.

Good effort

Silly and funny.

I would call it a parody but it's close to life! Yes it is. Some doctors are like that to me.
And see - she did the xray. That's unnecessary radiation - and some would like to put us through that!

You have typos, but who doesn't. And I would get rid of "Cont'd." Also "beat"'s and sometimes you would just have them nod - that took me out. Hmm that sounds like writing advice and I can't give those.
But a fellow writer once wrote a piece that didn't make sense. And he said that he wanted just to test how the non-sensical thing would fair against the rest. He was a very good writer - writing wise.
People gave it good and very good mostly.
That same writer told me to work on my beats. I don't remember how he phrased it, but he said that I have those stopping beats messed up. (I didn't use the word "beat" btw, just had the characters stop and indicated the stops with nodding, facial exressions etc). Perhaps that's a topic for a greater discussion.

Very nice and very funny!
Dr Hu is a hoot

Huge thanks to everyone for all the reads and kind comments. I’m glad many of you got a laugh (especially you, Libby!). I’ve been stuck at the hospital (surprise!) for days on end but I’ve been trying to sneak peeks at all the comments here. I know many of you likened Dr. Hu and Dr. Watt to the famous Abbott and Costello bit, but I was actually also thinking of two cardiologists that were partners in our hospital:  Dr. Wyatt and Dr. Wong. I kid you not. We got a lot of comic mileage out of those two!

Again, thank you all and a special thanks to Yuvraj for hosting a fun and challenging OWC!

I was LOL with your short.
I believe comedy it is the hardest genre.

The pacing and simplicity worked out well for me.

Good job!

Quoted from Miranda I was LOL with your short. I believe comedy it is the hardest genre. The pacing and simplicity worked out well for me. Good job!

Thank you for the read and comments, Miranda. I’m glad you decided to join in the fun of the OWCs. Maybe next time you will decide to enter something of your own. I hope so - it’s a fun learning experience. There is so much writing talent and experience in this group. Welcome to Simply Scripts!