Meets the criteria, for sure. The many (MANY) characters and clunky dialog is what seemed to drag this down for me. Maybe I misunderstood but I didn't get the 'off to the shop' line and then we're on a plane?

Great effort. The story was there but needed more thought on execution.

- maybe give the virus a name?
- is that where it ends? Might be a page missing.

"Virus by Vaccine" sounds like an interesting title all by itself

The virus would quickly earn itself a name, if nothing else from the location where it was first spotted. Unless it was spotted in Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu, New Zealand.

The characters are pretty relatable and sound realistic. This actually turns out to be a problem at the bottom of page 3, where we have Denise telling someone stuff that the audience already knows. You should do your best to avoid this UNLESS there's some important omission or other tidbit the audience needs to see. The same thing happens again when Betty tells Dan what the audience just saw. Yes, a real person would do that, but generally speaking movie characters do not.

The biting is a new symptom? Surely the CDC/news would have mentioned something, even if they had to cloak their safety recommendation in calm-the-public terms. "The virus is extremely contagious, avoid any contact with people who show any of these symptoms." Yadda yadda yadda.

Okay, this day is going to end very badly for these pilots.

Coming back to the beginning: Why was the virus spread in the first place? We never learn the Mysterious Man's motivation.

A good effort here, but that motivation thing is bugging me.

First off, I'll echo some of the other comments.

Mmmm... personally, I don't have to empathize or be sympathetic to the characters to like them.  They just have to be interesting.... and they're not anywhere close to being interesting.  Then again, I'm not a fan of zombie flicks.  So maybe I'm the wrong person to be critiquing this one, but I did finish.  Good effort.-Andrea

Interesting idea to use the hand sanitizer as a delivery system for the virus. I doubt a virus could survive that, but this is clearly a weaponized super-bug of some sort, so okay, I'll buy it.

Not just a virus. A zombie virus. Though I have to question why the first time anyone turns into a zombie is on this flight. The virus was already spreading before, surely the more violent symptoms would have been splashed all over the news too.

Otherwise, the horror is good but you let the main characters drop out once the turning began. It suddenly becomes about the virus, we follow the flight attendant more than the family. If one is our main character they should have locked themselves in the bathroom or something so you could stay with them or at least keep going back to them to keep the horror of the situation going full bore.

The ending was abrupt, but 5 pages, right? It isn't satisfying, there needs to be more.

Not a bad take on the challenge at all, but it could be better.