Congrats, JB!  Way to go!!!!

Jonny

Congratulations with getting this picked up, I hope the production is coming along.

I liked out you effectively described Eric and Megan within the first page, both in physical and contrasting body language profile without going in to too much detail. It was amusing and vivid, while setting up these personalities straight away for the reader.

MEGAN
You sound like you’re quoting
Wikipedia.

-- Guilty of it myself I must admit but excellent put down regardless.

ERIC
I found myself, Megan. I looked,
and I found myself. It was like,
"There you are!"

Eric points at himself with his left hand.

ERIC (CONTD.)
"Yes! Here I am!"

-- Ha ha, great pseudo intellectual babbling.

BARB (O.S.)
So what’ll it be?

-- Great double meaning interject here, well timed.

ERIC
So? They have spell-checkers now.
That’s the beauty of modern
technology - you don’t have to be
good at something to be successful
at it. Look at Kesha.

-- Painfully true in many walks of life and none more then the “entertainment” industry.

ERIC
I’m breaking up with you. I need
some tragedy, you see.

-- Possibly my favourite line of the piece, bravo!

Can’t say I’m a fan of the underlining dialogue technique for emphasis (prose not so much) but hey, it’s immaterial since you are getting it made.
Loved the flashbacks and the reveal that this is a regularly repeated thing for Eric to do, particularly the desert warfare marine notion. Also Eric’s noble reasons for not wanting to include Megan were comical, as if he’s the bigger man, the gentleman in not subjecting her to the trials and tribulations of his ever changing, fleeting vocation he decides to embark on…and then quickly change his mind.

I see criticism regarding the long blocks of text, I disagree. For me, most of the comedy, came from the character’s verbose ramblings. I took the long winded passages as a reflection on Eric’s ridiculously misguided hubris and Megan’s sheer frustration and bewilderment. Personally, I think the unwritten rule advising dialogue not to be over four lines is rather submissive and black and white to universally claim, as it all depends on the words spoken and if they work of not. Take Howard Beale’s rants in “Network”, possibly my favourite parts of the film and oft quoted yet if you read the script they sometimes encompass three pages but still make for riveting reading because its superbly written, that is what makes or breaks it, not the amount of space it takes up.

That ever present “why” a seemingly smart, level headed girl like Megan would even entertain a joker like Eric does raise the logic & plausibility argument but I get you were going for extreme polar opposites and deriving the laughs from that dynamic, and I think it worked quite well overall.

However, I do agree that the ending was a little tepid, I was expecting one last twist possibly with Eric showing us that he is is more then what we and Megan are led to believe or give him credit for. Perhaps he pulls a large manuscript out of his bag and begins working on it as if to give the impression he has already tackled his first “masterpiece” or maybe a quick phone call from a publisher or magazine expressing interest in a short story he has submitted prior. I know, pretty lame suggestion and it does go against everything you’ve set up regarding Eric’s character and his abilities. Nevertheless, I still think this would improve with a sting in the tail come the conclusion. Possibly work in a less then complimentary closing event for Megan as she leaves, something which undermines her dominance in the situation thus giving the hapless Eric the last laugh, nothing too serious or damning but coincidental and humorous.

Anyway, enough said, I definitely dug this as you can see by the number of excerpts I noted, very snappy, witty dialogue and colourful, diverse characters based around a bemusing situation. It had a surprising but wonderful energy and bounce to it for what would be coined a “talking heads” piece. Great to see stuff like this being appreciated and produced.

Good job.

Col.

Shameless bump because this is Script of the Day (which made me smile).

Unfortunately, the film version has been delayed to April / May. It's been in post-production since December; problems with outsourced work, apparently. Getting a nasty feeling it's going to fall at the final hurdle...hope I'm wrong. Especially since I've turned down other requests to shoot it in the meantime.

Anyway, hope anybody who might read this enjoys it. Bear in mind the rights have bene signed away so there's not much point in suggesting changes...but don't let that stop you.

Cute story. There are a lot of Erics out there, we've all known them, maybe to some degree we've all been him. I actually had no problem in seeing why Meghan stays with him. And we all know she will take him back again. That's the part of the story that doesn't even need to be said. The fact that Eric is a naive dreamer who avoids growing up is part of what attracts her to him, though she may not know it. Eric is a character we have seen in American literature throughout the twentieth century, has become kind of an archetype. I can completely see where someone would want to film this.

Just to let y'all know the DVD of this arrived today. It's finally finished! And it's actually turned out great. They were always open that they'd made alterations to the script, but there's still a lot of my stuff in there, the characters are what I had in mind and obviously the original idea was mine. The cinematography and sound are absolutely flawless, and the actors are really good.

The film's been submitted to festivals so it's not mine to share, but here's a sneaky screenshot I took with my phone:



Seeing Eric's costume realised is particularly exciting - it's EXACTLY what I wrote. And I do own a beret just like that! Not that he's based on me. At all.

If the film becomes publicly share-able I'll be sure to post the link. Just waiting to hear if it makes festivals now!

Hey Jon,

Congrats on the production credit!
A one location shoot and a decent scenario.
I can see why this one got picked up.
Good for you, look forward to seeing the final cut.

Regards,
E.D.

Hey JB, new to this site so hadn't seen the script before.  Well done on having this filmed, must feel good.

It seems to me that anything that's been picked up deserves a read as it appealed to someone.

I enjoyed the script and can understand the  feedback from the SS readers but as this has now been produced the most interesting part to me is to see what they changed and try and understand why. Must be something to learn.

All the best.

Good job JB! From the screen shot this looks like a big production. Hope to be able to view this soon as it makes its festival run. Good job. That whould net you an IMBD credit as a writer. Good place to start.

James

Thanks, guys. Majorly chuffed with it.

Hey all, for those of you who aren't friends with me on the Facebook I thought I'd share it here, too: 'Finding Eric' had its World Premiere on Friday, October 21st at the Lucerne International Film Festival, Switzerland.

http://www.lucernefilmfestival.....21/96/-/finding-eric

I was talking to an indie director the other day and he mentioned that the most difficult restaurant location to find is a coffee shop.

They never close.  When are they going to let you in to film cheap or free?

Taverns, yes.  Pizza joint, yes.  Coffee shop, good luck.

Quoted from JonnyBoy Hey all, for those of you who aren't friends with me on the Facebook I thought I'd share it here, too: 'Finding Eric' had its World Premiere on Friday, October 21st at the Lucerne International Film Festival, Switzerland. http://www.lucernefilmfestival.....21/96/-/finding-eric

You go! You international film maven!

It's supremely amusing where "Finding Eric" showed up in the schedule.
Right between "Why Does God Hate Me" & "Quik Fix".
Big time congrats! Let us know when and where we can see the finished product.
Now, get on a plane and impress all those Swiss Misses with your film bling!

Cheers,
E.D.

I like the phrase..... "world premiere".

I trust you have the credit for writing?

Well done.

Heard a couple of days ago that Finding Eric is an Official Selection at the Skepto International Film festival in Cagliari, Italy. It'll screen March 31st!

http://www.skepto.net/submission/finding-eric

Hi peeps, sorry to resurrect a thread that's been dead for two years BUT --

After countless emails to the production company that shot this (with the new title Finding Eric) asking them to upload the film online - they sent me a DVD originally - I eventually gave up. But now I see they posted it to Vimeo a month ago! Which makes me very happy.

So here it is. What happened was they read the script, emailled me asking for the rights, and then sent me a version with their rewrites (not for approval, really just for courtesy). The ending's different and when Victoria gets emotional that's not what I'd had in mind at all - actually, reading along they paraphrased a fair few of the lines, too - but it's fascinating to see how things evolve when it gets in the hands of others.

Anyway, this played in a few festivals in Europe in 2012. I think it turned out well. It's 10 minutes so I totally understand if no-one has the time, but if you do watch it, hope you enjoy.

Finding Eric from Red Bandit Productions on Vimeo.