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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Horror  ›  The Lost Camp
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  Author    The Lost Camp  (currently 829 views)
Don
Posted: May 24th, 2020, 5:24pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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The Lost Camp by Connor Etter - Short, Horror - Three boys at a sleepaway summer camp discover an abandoned, Old West town that is home to a dark spirit with intent on vengeance. 12 pages  - pdf format

contest: Inroads Fellowship (Finalist) [2019]; New York International (Finalist) [2020]; Los Angeles International (Finalist) [2018]; Finalist, Creative World Awards 2021

Writer interested in feedback on this work



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Revision History (1 edits)
Don  -  June 19th, 2022, 10:01pm
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Yuvraj
Posted: May 25th, 2020, 1:41am Report to Moderator
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Hey, Connor,

This one is an interesting read. Thoroughlly enjoyed.

At the point where you mentioned about the MAN walking in the village when Luke, Dustin and Christian were in the there too, I thought the killer might be Jack( he was dead, I guess). I was somewhat correct I think.

I have a little bit of difficulty understanding the continuity of the 'camp photo'. Your script flowed: first, the photo was taken with all the three boys and then the events that happened in the village took place a 'night before' the photo was taken. But then how come Dustin and Luke were in the photo? Poor Dustin and Luke, both were dead. Only survivor was Christian, who was the ultimate suspect. Maybe the whole camp thing was a delusion. I don't know.

But congrats for your script been mentioned among the finalist of the contests.

Good luck.    



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Yuvraj  -  June 3rd, 2020, 3:54am
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