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OWC - Love Is All You Need (currently 4132 views) |
Don |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 2:33pm |
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AdministratorAdministrator So, what are you writing?
LocationVirginia Posts16449 Posts Per Day 1.94 |
Love Is All You Need by Bugs Bunny - Short, Drama - A secret is revealed during a family picnic. - pdf, format |
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------------- You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take. - Wayne Gretzky
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michel |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 2:49pm |
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Old Timer
LocationFrance Posts1156 Posts Per Day 0.18 |
Short (too short?), crude and not good. This is definetely not a drama. "Memories" is a master piece compared to this one. I can't see the writer's intent. |
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Zombie Sean |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 3:02pm |
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Old Timer
LocationColorado Posts1547 Posts Per Day 0.23 |
I loved this one. No pun intended. Wait, yes it is. I can't stop laughing. I can imagine this being in a Robot Chicken episode...Or a Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job skit.
Sean |
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Astrid |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 4:04pm |
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I like this one, too. It's like one big middle finger. LOL. Anyway, its well written, well formatted and meets all the criteria. |
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bobtheballa |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 7:29pm |
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Yikes. Poor grammar, no drama, there was a secret and a picnic though.
As for "scripts that didn't even try," I thought this one was funnier than "Memories" and it's the first script I've ever read written by a cartoon character. |
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Dreamscale |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 8:26pm |
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Pathetic! Embarrassing! Really a total terd. Another crap entry that didn't take anything seriously. Not remotely funny. This kind of shit shouldn't even be allowed to be posted.
What a waste! |
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steven8 |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 8:56pm |
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Old Timer The Ed Wood of Simply Scripts
LocationBarberton, OH Posts1156 Posts Per Day 0.22 |
Quoted from Dreamscale Pathetic! Embarrassing! Really a total terd. Another crap entry that didn't take anything seriously. Not remotely funny. This kind of shit shouldn't even be allowed to be posted.
What a waste! |
I don't think it's any stretch of the imagination to think that the author did not feel they had just produced the next Citizen Kane when it was completed. Dreamy, I'm beginning to wonder if folks don't just do this stuff to see if they can get your blood vessels to burst. Seems to be working. . . |
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Andrew |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 9:16pm |
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Old Timer
Posts1791 Posts Per Day 0.32 |
Well.... I am a little flummoxed as to why someone would enter this!
Comedy is so subjective! If I thought it was funny, I would probably be enthused about this, but I didn't and I'm not!
I look forward to the author's comments!
Andrew |
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Reply: 7 - 32 |
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Shelton |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 9:22pm |
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Of The Ancients
LocationChicago Posts3292 Posts Per Day 0.49 |
I look forward to the author's comments!
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I think this was written by the AMPTP's script machine. |
| Shelton's IMDb Profile
"I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper." - Steve Martin |
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Reply: 8 - 32 |
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Cam17 |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 9:29pm |
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New
LocationLos Angeles Posts153 Posts Per Day 0.03 |
I'm guessing the author is British, from his use of the phrase the "lot of them." Just a guess, though. I have to admit, it was so damn primitive it made me laugh. This really reads like something written by a high school freshman. No drama, no dialogue, no characterization. But the thought of this little bastard calling his family a bunch of creepy cunts...it made me laugh. |
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Andrew |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 9:33pm |
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Old Timer
Posts1791 Posts Per Day 0.32 |
But the thought of this little bastard calling his family a bunch of creepy cunts...it made me laugh. |
Haha!! That just really made me chuckle. I have no idea why, but the use of "little bastard" can be so funny when used correctly!
Quoted from Shelton I think this was written by the AMPTP's script machine. |
And possibly one or two more! Andrew |
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mcornetto |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 9:38pm |
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Looks like someone jizzed all over the OWC. |
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The boy who could fly |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 9:41pm |
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Old Timer
LocationBritish Columbia, Canada Posts1387 Posts Per Day 0.21 |
This is a breathless, exciting story, heartbreaking and exhilarating at the same time........wait...that's Eberts review for slumdog, oh well, I think it fits for this one as well, me likey |
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Shelton |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 9:42pm |
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Of The Ancients
LocationChicago Posts3292 Posts Per Day 0.49 |
This script makes me want to never write anything again. There are probably some who are pleased by that. |
| Shelton's IMDb Profile
"I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper." - Steve Martin |
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Tommyp |
Posted: April 11th, 2009, 10:05pm |
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Been Around Continuity Is For Pussies...
LocationAustralia Posts701 Posts Per Day 0.12 |
Hmmm interesting script. Don't really like it. At all. Too short... and to yuck... |
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Sham |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 4:31am |
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LocationUSA Posts359 Posts Per Day 0.05 |
Well, the format was correct. There was a picnic...and a secret...and...uhh...
Quoted from Dreamscale Pathetic! Embarrassing! Really a total terd. Another crap entry that didn't take anything seriously. Not remotely funny. This kind of shit shouldn't even be allowed to be posted.
What a waste! |
Will I get banned for agreeing with Dreamscale? Because I can't believe I just spent some free time reading this crap. |
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stebrown |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 5:15am |
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Been Around
LocationNewcastle, England Posts881 Posts Per Day 0.15 |
This made me laugh. Really was funny, the sort of stuff that could appear on a British sketch show.
I think it meets the criteria of the challenge, just.
Obviously this wasn't meant to be taken seriously and was just a bit of a laugh, no harm with doing that. |
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Brian M |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 5:29am |
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LocationGlasgow Posts434 Posts Per Day 0.08 |
Definitely written by someone from Britain. I laughed, but was pi**ed off at the same time that I just wasted several minutes of my time on it. |
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JonnyBoy |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 5:48am |
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January Project Group
LocationLondon, England Posts994 Posts Per Day 0.18 |
I get the feeling that this was produced in about five minutes, with no real thought put into it.
Meeting the competition criteria: this is not a drama. It just isn't. It's not even a comedy for me. However, since you have a family, a picnic, and a secret, I have to give you SOME points - 6/10 Characters: the only one with anything about them is Charlie. However, the other family members were creepy, I'll give you that. But as for actual characterisation? Not a great deal - 3/10 Dialogue: I didn't laugh at the punchline. In fact, my reaction was a Dr. Evil-style 'Riiight...'. Since the rest of the script is a build-up to this punchline, and the punchline didn't work for me, I can't really say ANY of it worked for me - 3/10 Story: none. Whatsoever. Also, I find it highly unlikely that the rest of the family would catch HIV from eating jizzed-on potato salad - 2/10 Writing/format: you have typos (in a two page script!), you're missing in and out transitions, but the format is generally okay - 5/10
TOTAL: 19/50 |
| Guess who's back? Back again? |
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Reply: 18 - 32 |
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cloroxmartini |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 11:24am |
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Been Around
LocationYou know what a saguaro is? Posts803 Posts Per Day 0.14 |
Yeah.....
....no (x 20). |
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Revision History (1 edits) |
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BryMo |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 12:07pm |
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New
LocationOrlando Posts212 Posts Per Day 0.03 |
L.M.F.A.O
That's all this entry deserves. |
| Shorts: Good Golly Miss Molly No Place Like Home New Moon Rising Yuno - BRAND-*SPANKIN*-NEW! The Ballad of Uncle Sam: An Anarchists Melody Toy Soldier This Modern Love A Virgin State of Mind
A GUIDE TO MY LITERARY BABIES |
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Murphy |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 6:43pm |
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Quoted from Dreamscale Pathetic! Embarrassing! Really a total terd. |
It is spelled Turd. |
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Murphy |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 6:47pm |
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I have to admit I did laugh, loudly when I got to the end. I feel a little embarrassed admitting this.
Unlike others I have no problem with somebody using the OWC to throw something out there that is meant to shock, or make people laugh. This is a piece of crap, there is no denying that. But it is a funny piece of crap and hopefully the writer got it out of his system and said what he wanted to say.
Like Cornetto my first thought was that the OWC, or even the SS message board had just been jizzed on. Maybe that was the case, will be interesting to see who the writer is.
Well done, whoever you are. Hope it was worth the effort. |
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bert |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 10:15pm |
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AdministratorBuy the ticket, take the ride
LocationThat's me in the corner Posts4233 Posts Per Day 0.61 |
I wrote a OWC script once with the intention of having people hate it. I did. That was my goal.
It was a very short, disgusting, anonymous script -- and I deliberately set out to have post after post telling my how wretched it was. Brea ripped my little script to shreds, much to my delight.
I suspect that was the author's intent here, too. And I was quite surprised when my little script found a few fans -- as this one has.
I did not like this one much. But I would hold off on roasting the author until I know who it is. And I have a few suspects. My guess is somebody is yanking your chain. |
| Hey, it's my tiny, little IMDb! |
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Grandma Bear |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 10:17pm |
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Administrator
LocationThe Swamp... Posts7967 Posts Per Day 1.35 |
Short and to the point. Followed the OWC assignment. You might not win an Oscar for this one, but it wasn't really the worst I've read either. You get sort of a low grade for effort, but score high on following the assignment. Cheers. |
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Grandma Bear |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 10:19pm |
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LocationThe Swamp... Posts7967 Posts Per Day 1.35 |
Hey Bert, I remember yours. It was someone's candy treat/surprise for Halloween. |
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MBCgirl |
Posted: April 12th, 2009, 10:34pm |
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New Some things are better left to the imagination!
LocationScottsdale Posts385 Posts Per Day 0.07 |
I'm pretty much speechless over this...but as most of you know I'll be finding some words to share my thoughts. Talking about NOT Taking the OWC seriously...this is a perfect example. I thought "Memories" was bad, but after reading this..."Memories" developed some redeeming qualities! Numerous basic writing mistakes in the first 3 paragraphs...crude and juvenile...and a waste of page. Shelton says it makes him not want to write ever again...on the contrary my good friend Shelton...KEEP WRITING...someone should! Morgan |
| http://www.myspace.com/mbcgirl
I love words and the fact that when the page is blank...there's nothing there until words are formulated in my brain. Those thoughts...rushing through my viens and out my finger tips, find "life" on the page.
When people and places come to life...that to me is exciting.
MBCgirl =) My finger nails should look nice while I type - Red works! |
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Abe from LA |
Posted: April 13th, 2009, 3:52am |
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Been Around
LocationDowney, California Posts556 Posts Per Day 0.08 |
Yeah, I thought the potato salad had a distinct mayo overload. No doubt an Intentional Bad Squirt day for one writer.
Who would dare write this without a condom? |
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George Willson |
Posted: April 13th, 2009, 10:29am |
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Of The Ancients Doctor who? Yes, quite right.
LocationBroken Arrow Posts3591 Posts Per Day 0.51 |
All right. I'll acknowledge that I read it, but that's about it. That wasn't even a joke. No build up at all.
It feels like a joke told by a sixth grader who just found out what jizz is. He tells his 6th grade friends this joke and they all laughs while the teachers roll their eyes and consider how stupid they'll think it is when they grow up. |
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jayrex |
Posted: April 13th, 2009, 11:00am |
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Old Timer Cut to three weeks earlier
LocationLondon, UK Posts1420 Posts Per Day 0.22 |
Another skit more suited to the short section. This was okay. Didn't meet the challenge but I guess this is a regular of SS who just wanted to screw with some peoples heads. |
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rc1107 |
Posted: April 13th, 2009, 3:09pm |
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Old Timer
LocationYoungstown Posts1241 Posts Per Day 0.20 |
Eh. Well I can't say it was a complete waste of time as it only took me about 48 seconds to read it. But I can say honestly say I really didn't care for it.
Now, maybe if the author had really worked hard on an 8 page treatment building up drama and showing us the characters, then unloaded the aids and the potato salad... that would have made something grand.
I think. Or maybe it just would've pissed me off more.
Either way, although I thought it was a waste, I have to admit... I smiled.
- Mark |
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Blakkwolfe |
Posted: April 13th, 2009, 3:56pm |
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Been Around
LocationFlorida, USA Posts706 Posts Per Day 0.12 |
Might want to brush up the grammar, missed some commas in the dialogue...Technically, I don't know if HIV can be transmitted in the manner that was described, but whatever... Didn't find it terribly funny, either, but eh, that's just me...I'd expect better from my favowite wascawy wabbit... |
| Failure is only the opportunity to begin again more intelligently - Dove Chocolate Wrapper |
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grademan |
Posted: April 17th, 2009, 11:22am |
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Been Around
LocationWisconsin Posts872 Posts Per Day 0.16 |
I laughed like I was in high school again. Anyhow, would it have been more British to say silly bunts? And how could you tell the mayo just hadn't gone bad? Seriously, I didn't like it as an OWC entry. Same for Memories.
Gary |
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