Quoted from FrankM . That's especially impressive since you don't seem to know anything about baseball. .

Oh, you're killing me! (I'm just goofing here...)

Been a HUGE baseball fan my whole life. Spent over a decade in sports radio hosting talk shows -- primarily about baseball and football.

Of course... now that I think about it... I did regularly get people telling me I had no idea what I was talking about... so, carry on.

(I pictured the card as a rare insert... akin to a signed Ken Griffey, Jr. rookie card... one that everyone knows is going to go through the roof.)

Seriously, though. Thanks for the comments.



My 2 big decisions in writing this were 1. flashback? 2. how to handle the names

I knew I'd get comments no matter which direction I took it.

I'm glad I handled the flashbacks the way I did. It's exactly how you'd see it on screen... with no indication we're in different times.

I originally didn't change the names on the last page... and I didn't call out the transition between the times. I wish I would have kept it that way. But, I could just hear someone saying "but, they're different actors, so we need to know that for production purposes." to which, I'd reply "I'll change it for the shooting script."

I went back and forth... finally decided to change them. I'll be changing it back.

Quoted from DustinBowcot Code GUNMAN No. Take me to the church. This is a moment... milk it. GUNMAN No. Their eyes meet in the rearview mirror. GUNMAN The church.

I love this note. Thanks!

Oh yeah, last thought... regarding the boys' dialogue.

I picture these boys as old beyond their years, due to their very rough upbringing. So, they use language that makes them feel bigger and tougher.

Okay... I've spammed my own script thread enough.

Again, thanks to all for the notes and comments. I'll be rewriting this with many of the suggested changes.

In Preproduction

Congrats, Paul. You're on a roll!

Quoted from Warren Congrats, Paul. You're on a roll!

Thanks, Warren! Absolutely loving the producer and director on this project. Rewrites have been awesome. Casting has begun.

I can't wait to see what they do with it.

Quoted from PKCardinal Thanks, Warren! Absolutely loving the producer and director on this project. Rewrites have been awesome. Casting has begun. I can't wait to see what they do with it.

Sounds like you got a winner, they are unfortunately few and far between.

Good luck.

Congrats! Hope it turns out great.

Covid has knocked this production back several times... but, I just received word (and pictures) of construction on the church set for this short. Looks like it's finally going to happen.

Quoted from PKCardinal Covid has knocked this production back several times... but, I just received word (and pictures) of construction on the church set for this short. Looks like it's finally going to happen.

Awesome news, can't wait to see this one!

Quoted from Warren Awesome news, can't wait to see this one!

Thanks, Warren.

I also co-wrote a short last year with this director and he shot that script. It's being edited now. The stills were amazing. Hopefully I'll have something to share on that one, too. It was a good script and a fun collaboration, so I'm rooting hard for it.

Look forward to seeing both, PK.
Great news!

Good news all round then... happy to hear it

Great news Paul!