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I finished the new draft tonight, pages 70 -101. Overall, it feels more plot driven than character oriented. I don't have much to say because I felt most of the scenes could go only one way. I never felt Zeke make any decisions to change how things go. This comes back to the note I gave before about the concept of dilemma. I don't feel any conflict in the third act that Zeke must make a choice. He never has to chose between a career or relationships. Circumstances seem to dictate which way he will go. When free will is off the table, it tends to make for a stiff read. But this is a new draft and rewriting is always good. There's some new material I've commented on previously that I like. I think Drew is less annoying in this draft, he's going in the right direction. I think the big question now is, "What is Zeke's dilemma?"
Thanks for posting! Keep writing and rewriting!
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I'm certain i'm going to change up the plot. I think this draft focused the story more, but what i'm getting from you and others, i think i focused it on the wrong thing. I have some ideas about where I'm going to take it.