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Repetition - OWC (currently 5936 views)
BPeterson
Posted: March 8th, 2008, 2:08am
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Location rockford illinois
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awesome job, sean.
Reply: 30 - 31
RobertSpence
Posted: March 8th, 2008, 6:36pm
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Location Melbourne, Australia
Posts 226
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This was a fantastic read, by far the best I've read out of all the chalanges. I thought I would check this out due to its hype, and I can see why. I've read things by you in the past Sean and have to say your writing has improved significantly. Your dialogue is spot on, descriptions great, format great. Use of voice over perfect. Only one suggestion which will seem trivial because I scouldn't find any errors throughout. He laughs maniacally, I think a word like manically would be good. Just a small silly thing. I'm into the whole english thing haha.
Reply: 31 - 31
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