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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Screenwriting Discussion    Script Review Exchange  ›  Scapegoat - Guilty - script exchange Moderators: the goose
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BillyJ
Posted: August 5th, 2020, 6:27am Report to Moderator
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Scapegoat - Guilty

https://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-dramedy/m-1596657322/s-new/

Dramedy - A self hating, middle aged attorney will go to any lengths to stop his daughter fromturning out like he did. Yet the only way to save her is to change the way he is, will he learn how to do this before his world falls to pieces? 147 pages

++++++++++++++++++++++++

Hey everyone my script is taking a while to upload because I'm stupid with it but hopefully be up in the next week. I've just completed 2nd script but I was wondering if anyone with dramedies will swap me?

Looking for other dramedies to swap with and will give a full day read and make notes as I go along for you? Looking for people to help me cut my 'scapegoat guilty' script down - will be uploaded soon and also maybe teach me better transitions and how to bullet point this screenplay better - maybe make it more enjoyable to read?

I'll give my fullest attention and will read 1 script a day with as much notes as I can, thankyou very much I'm looking forward to reading.




Revision History (2 edits; 1 reasons shown)
Don  -  August 7th, 2020, 12:59pm
Clarified request
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BarryJohn
Posted: August 6th, 2020, 9:41am Report to Moderator
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Who am I? A man with a hundred stories..

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Hi BillyJ

Suggestion... Lets wait till after you have posted your script hereto. Giving you the opportunity "re-work" your script according to the good advice / comments we will give thereto.

You can't expect a script exchange read with what you don't have: Title and logline.  

  


Who am I? A man with a hundred stories... you want to read one?
Analyst, mentor, competition reader/judge, film critic, magazine article/blogger.  
https://simpsonliteraryagency.com/script-analyst
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LC
Posted: August 6th, 2020, 6:01pm Report to Moderator
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BillyJ
Posted: August 7th, 2020, 4:03am Report to Moderator
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Thanks LC sorry I know I’m like a old man on here haha but anyone need a script review? I can start reviewing today on my breaks be really happy to


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FrankH
Posted: October 18th, 2020, 12:29pm Report to Moderator
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Hey Billy,

I'm interested in a script exchange. Your preference seams to be a dramedy script, mine is a thriller, "Strength of a Soul". Let me know if you're interested to exchange reads.

Frank


FEATURES:
Strength of a Soul (Thriller/Supernatural)
Inconceivable Pain (Thriller)

SHORT COMEDY:
Heads or Tails
Happy Birthday
Size Doesn't Matter

SHORT DRAMA:
Imaginary Friend
Sleepwalking

SHORT THRILLER:
Unbreakable Bond
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BillyJ
Posted: November 11th, 2020, 2:51pm Report to Moderator
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Hey frank hope all is well sorry I haven’t been on here for a while I will review your script but could you review my pilot instead it’s on series it’s called Republic Dread, please give me some time though I thought I could do it quick but I try to write then I type it up from paper then I edit it I’m trying to pitch now aswell, anything to make me feel like I’m going somewhere forward I hope. Take your time and if you could give that a read that would be sweet I’ll check out your script


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FrankH
Posted: November 11th, 2020, 9:18pm Report to Moderator
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Hey Billy,

I'll take a stab at your Series, "Republic Dread.". I've not reviewed a Series type script before, should be interesting.

It wasn't clear to me if you want me to wait, or just go ahead and review it.

Let me know.

Frank


FEATURES:
Strength of a Soul (Thriller/Supernatural)
Inconceivable Pain (Thriller)

SHORT COMEDY:
Heads or Tails
Happy Birthday
Size Doesn't Matter

SHORT DRAMA:
Imaginary Friend
Sleepwalking

SHORT THRILLER:
Unbreakable Bond
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BillyJ
Posted: November 12th, 2020, 6:23pm Report to Moderator
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0.03
Hey frank yeah you can have a go ive alreazy tried to send out scapegoat guilty now,. And I think a series only I think 53 pages would be better, Thankyou for doing this It means a lot and I really think that it will help. Let me finish the last pages of alsobens “flitsam” and I’ll get right on yours don’t worry about offending it’s all about me learning I won’t take anything personally and I hope you won’t either, looking forward to it frank.


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FrankH
Posted: November 13th, 2020, 8:23pm Report to Moderator
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Billy,

I get going with your pilot, Republic Dread.

Here's a link to my script (Thriller/psychological), "Strength of a Soul".

https://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-thriller/m-1602779291/.

Looking forward to your feedback.

Frank


FEATURES:
Strength of a Soul (Thriller/Supernatural)
Inconceivable Pain (Thriller)

SHORT COMEDY:
Heads or Tails
Happy Birthday
Size Doesn't Matter

SHORT DRAMA:
Imaginary Friend
Sleepwalking

SHORT THRILLER:
Unbreakable Bond
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Private Message Reply: 8 - 8
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