Using Bert's sound effect, you could write it like this:

John, knife in hand, peeks around the corner.

BLAMMM!

He ducks back as the wall EXPLODES over his head.

He cowers in his hiding spot as FOOT STEPS are heard, growing louder.  He looks up and sees Tony a few feet from him.  Tony holds a pump action shotgun in his hands and pumps another shell--

CHA-CHUNK

--into chamber.

           JOHN
    Fuck....

           TONY
    That's the word I'd use.




Phil

LOL. Such creativity of sounds I've just unleashed on this thread. It's great. I would like to thank all of you for your contributions. But I already sent in my work a few minutes ago, but this all comes in handy for anyone else and probably a couple future scripts of mine.

Gabriel

Quoted from Mr.Ripley But I already sent in my work a few minutes ago...

Hmm....I don't like reading that, Gabriel.

Sounds like you sent it in within minutes of typing the final fade.

Did you proof it carefully?

Did you set it aside for at least a few days -- then return to it and read it again?

These are important steps -- even for a short -- and most of the best writers here will tell you that those final revisions -- the kind you make yourself -- are vital before putting a story out there for everyone else to read.

Oh yes Bert, I have a habit of always re-reading my work everytime I go back to it. It's a habit I've had for a long time.

For example, If I am close to finishing a feature length script, I re-read everything in order to get the flow and enter the mood the story entails. If I find an error or a great inspiriation comes to me during my read, I would not progress further. Rather, I would stay there into the problem is fixed or my new entry fits perfectly along with the other scenes.

I'm not one of those who quickly write their scripts within  two or three days and then post it up. I usually have two scripts to work on. When I'm done with one script, I work on another script in order to refresh from the previous one.

I don't calcualte time as well when I write. But I estimate that it takes me a good week or two to write a script. I have recently been working only on two, Closed In and the  one that's soon coming up. But I do proofread Bert and take some time from it, I appreciate your concern from a writer to another writer.

I'm not saying its 100% perfect, but it's the best that I can offer to my work, to my speical muse.  

This, in my opinion, is the best way to write it.

Fat Tony loads the shotgun, he snaps it shut with a WHO PUT THE BOP IN THE BOP DE BOP DE BOP, WHO PUT THE KLANG IN THE  KLINGA KLANGA DING LANG.

With description like that, the script will sell before it's done.

HaHaHa.  That is a creative way of writing that scene.