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From reading both this & "Taken for a Ride" the similarities are uncanny (which I'm sure you are sick of hearing about at this stage)
I see from some of the exchanges between ye on both discussion boards that it is one of those coincidences life throws up more often then it should (regardless of the fact yours is dated a year earlier, I take it if James was to copy your concept which I know he didn't, he wouldn't have been so blatant about it.)
Good piece here. For me, both have good qualities even though Gerald comes across as a bit of an asshole he is by no means the same brand of twat Mike was in "Taken for a Ride" thus making that con even sweeter.
Your writing was top notch:
BRANDON Can I still call you Tiffany for a little while longer, though? It was turning me on a little bit. Kind of like a threesome.
Great piece of dialogue here, my favorite in the script.
I think this is a tighter story then "taken for a ride" more believable even tho I do question, given Gerald's character that he would hand over a $1000 bucks like that...
But then again that's the blindness of greed since he believes $2800 is on the way to him for that piece of sh?t ring.
I read James' script, and then this one, since I noticed the thread about the similarities. You guys are right, and it's obvious that the storylines are the same, but outside of that, they're different enough.
One thing I noticed about yours, is that it goes on a little bit longer after the con is revealed, and for good reason with Brandon and Allison looking to get their own ring, but it could have been trimmed just a little more. Maybe with an angle where the $120 ring was their original engagement ring, but this was done in order to upgrade. Maybe it's just me, but something like that adds a little more to the rationale they have.
Yeah, this is a really old con from the 1800's. It was originally done with a glass eye. Somebody would pretend to have it drop out of their eye socket. Kinda morbid if you really think about it. Thanks for taking a look.
Col,
Thanks for the comments. Yeah, as I was reading 'Taken for a Ride' by James R, I was getting that queasy feeling in my tummy. Pretty weird coincidence. Thanks for the statement about the top-notch writing, too.
Mike,
Yeah, 'The Glim Dropper' does go on for a little bit longer than necessary and I keep meaning to go back and shave off a couple pages and trim a few scenes. Now that this seems to be getting more hits, (Woohoo! Over a thousand views!) I'm inspired now to get back to work on it. I'm also fairly certain I have James R and 'Taken for a Ride' to thank for the views this one's been getting lately.
Thanks for the read.
Javier,
Thanks for the comments. I'm glad you liked it. Lol, that's pretty funny having Tiffany give him the number for Tiffany's. I never even thought about that. I just might have to make some changes.
Thanks again to everyone for taking the time to read this.
Yeah, this is a really old con from the 1800's. It was originally done with a glass eye. Somebody would pretend to have it drop out of their eye socket.
Wow, I saw a description of this con on Wikipedia, but I don't think that's what it said. I wish that is what I would have done for my version now!
Wow, I saw a description of this con on Wikipedia, but I don't think that's what it said. I wish that is what I would have done for my version now!
It's cool that you linked all your scripts. I hadn't known about this one before.
LOL, what's with putting a Florida phone number in there? I sense a story within a story.
Brandon should've skimmed the grand, if he was a true grifter.
I'm a grift fan, so I knew the "con" from the title. It was popularized a couple years back in Zombieland.
However, "Nine Queens" is a great con film, as well as, "House of Games". And of course, "The Grifters", some of John Cusack's finest work on the screen, IMO.
LATEST NEWS CineVita Films is producing a short based on my new feature!
Holy moly. This is coming up on its four year anniversary here at SimplyScripts!
Lol. Yeah, I did catalogue all my stories, (actually, there was one I still have to add that I totally forgot about that got optioned, but haven't heard from the director.)
Fair warning, though, that it's not a greatest hits collection, so there's some pretty rough structuring and formatting problems in them.
Lol. What a coincidence. The Florida phone number. Didn't we just talk about the 954 thing a couple days ago? :-) That was actually my real number when I lived down there.
I still haven't seen 'Nine Queens', but the Americanized version is called 'Criminal' starring John C. Reilly, Diego Luna and Maggie Gyllenhall. It was pretty good. I enjoyed it.
Thanks for digging this one up, Brett. I haven't looked at the script in years. I'm scared to look at it. I think that was even when I was trying to use some kind of software, too. I hated it. I love my Microsoft Works.
Bumping this oldie but goodie. Very much enjoyed this early work of yours — been so long since I’ve read anything from you. Of course, being an early script there are some minor formatting issues and such, but what I noticed most was that it had me turning pages. There wasn’t a full moment here, and the story and dialogue really kept me engaged throughout. Nice work. Wonder if this ever got picked up. Either way, nice script!