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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    One Week Challenge    May, 2015 One Week Challenge  ›  The May 2015 "Elevator" scripts
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  Author    The May 2015 "Elevator" scripts  (currently 26686 views)
DanC
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 11:21am Report to Moderator
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Killing villains since 1980!

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Quoted from khamanna
Read all 36? That's impressive.
It's not your first OWC, right, Dan? Just asking.


Nope, this was my first OWC.  I lost my virginity.  

I didn't do well.  I admit that I didn't really understand the parameters.  

Pia, did I give you a good review?  I'm curious.

Did you enter it Khammana?  Did I give you a good review?  There were some stories that I really liked.

I think the 2 Great White stories were from a team up that I saw earlier in the week.  

I don't know enough about most of you to know your style or not.  Still in the reading process.  I know I have written lots of stuff, but, I've been here less then 2 months.  Still trying to learn and get to know the regulars.

I hope we do another one before the 3 month time period.  I know I'd be willing to help if it meant we could do this again (just a more interesting challenge please )


Please read my scripts:
http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-series/m-1427564706/

I'm interested in reading animation, horror, sci fy, suspense, fantasy, and anything that is good.  I enjoy writing the same.  Looking to team with anyone!

Thanks
Dan
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rendevous
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 11:21am Report to Moderator
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Away

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I think I read them all. It's a large number. Much like erm, my debts.  

I think the odd one escaped me, and I tried to be fair, on the whole. Looking back I got a bit carried away on certain ones considering there are new writers about.

I remember those days. Certain comments can make you float for days, or sink like a stone for often much longer. Thankfully my ego is more resilient these days. Hopefully I didn't crush too many toes.

It's been interesting, and often taxing. I guess that's how it should be. Any less would be disappointing. That's always a bugger to spell, isn't it?

I'm looking forward to the right to reply. I'll be giving a good kicking to some daft arses, then getting the biscuits out for those who have more sense. Some will even be getting cake.

R


Out Of Character - updated


New Used Car

Green

Right Back

The Deuce - OWC - now on STS

Other scripts here
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Max
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 11:22am Report to Moderator
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Dreamscale actually helped me for the better.

I'm now employing his "white space" technique, basically.. you just break all the action up into the shots, which is what I wasn't doing... I was mixing everything in with everything.

Basically a way to develop white space on the page and make the reading really skimmy.

I just need to stop trying to get above my station with some of the descriptive writing because it turns into an awkward mess.

Start simple, break things up, don't try and be too flowery but be succinct and clear.


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DanC
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 11:22am Report to Moderator
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Killing villains since 1980!

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Quoted from eldave1
I am almost done as well - a few "lift" to go.

What I like best about the OWC is the challenge it presents to just effing write. Can't tell you how many times I have ignored the keyboard for days under the excuse of writer's block. The OWC is a good lesson in - hoist your pants up and start banging some stuff out - edit/review - keep going. Long winded way of saying the exercise of writing has it's own rewards and the OWC is a great gym to exercise in.


I totally agree.  That's why I wish we had more of these.  Call them monthly assignments.  I don't know about you, but, it isn't fair for Don to do all the work, I'd totally be willing to help out.  I bet others would too.

Dan


Please read my scripts:
http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-series/m-1427564706/

I'm interested in reading animation, horror, sci fy, suspense, fantasy, and anything that is good.  I enjoy writing the same.  Looking to team with anyone!

Thanks
Dan
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DanC
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 11:26am Report to Moderator
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Killing villains since 1980!

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Quoted from Max
Dreamscale actually helped me for the better.

I'm now employing his "white space" technique, basically.. you just break all the action up into the shots, which is what I wasn't doing... I was mixing everything in with everything.

Basically a way to develop white space on the page and make the reading really skimmy.

I just need to stop trying to get above my station with some of the descriptive writing because it turns into an awkward mess.

Start simple, break things up, don't try and be too flowery but be succinct and clear.




I think the rule of thumb is one paragraph for one thought.  Any deviance from that thought means a new paragraph.  It makes sense.  This isn't prose and this isn't novel or short story writing.  

The director and actors need to have a clear direction in what is expected of them.  By breaking up each train of thought, you make it easier for everyone to do their job.  I see that in so many scripts now.  

Max, I've read a few of your ideas, I'm sorry if I never mentioned about spacing out the ideas...

Dan


Please read my scripts:
http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-series/m-1427564706/

I'm interested in reading animation, horror, sci fy, suspense, fantasy, and anything that is good.  I enjoy writing the same.  Looking to team with anyone!

Thanks
Dan
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Grandma Bear
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 11:30am Report to Moderator
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Quoted from DanC

Pia, did I give you a good review?  I'm curious.

I think the 2 Great White stories were from a team up that I saw earlier in the week.  


If I told you, you would figure out which one I wrote.  

I know who wrote the Great White scripts, but again, I ain't telling.


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DanC
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 11:34am Report to Moderator
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Killing villains since 1980!

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Quoted from Grandma Bear


If I told you, you would figure out which one I wrote.  

I know who wrote the Great White scripts, but again, I ain't telling.


Bah,
I rated everyone.  I doubt that I'd recognize yours from your score, unless it was very high or very low...

I guess I can wait.  This is kinda like reverse Christmas when you want to know who did what so you can apologize for being such a jerk and try to repair friendships


Please read my scripts:
http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-series/m-1427564706/

I'm interested in reading animation, horror, sci fy, suspense, fantasy, and anything that is good.  I enjoy writing the same.  Looking to team with anyone!

Thanks
Dan
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Dreamscale
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 11:42am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


Yes, that is my real hair...

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Pia, I think I figured something out now...and it makes perfect sense now that I think about it.

Yep, perfect sense.  


To ski or not to ski...that's not even a question.
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khamanna
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 11:58am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


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Quoted from DanC



Did you enter it Khammana?  Did I give you a good review?  There were some stories that I really liked.



I saw an entry that seems like it could be mine! Let'see. I can't wait for the reveal of the names.
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bert
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 1:22pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Grandma Bear
...I will admit to have taken many liberties in the writing style, but I did it only to see how Jeff would react.


Haha...I do that, too!  And I put them right up front, so he'll bail early!!

Did not play this time -- none of the entries are mine -- but this comment amused me a great deal  


Hey, it's my tiny, little IMDb!
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DanC
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 1:26pm Report to Moderator
Old Timer


Killing villains since 1980!

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Quoted from bert


Haha...I do that, too!  And I put them right up front, so he'll bail early!!

Did not play this time -- none of the entries are mine -- but this comment amused me a great deal  


Bert,
    I saw what you said to that guy who wrote that comedy "Santa and the Pole Dancer."  You were right to say that.  He was so rude.  I can't believe he said that.  

I wouldn't be shocked if no one reads anything he does ever again.  I almost want to read it all the way through and if it ins't genius, really let him know how bad this American thinks it is.  

Can't believe he actually said he thought it was genius.  I mean, it's Santa and a pole dancer.  Genius isn't the first word I'd use...


Please read my scripts:
http://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-series/m-1427564706/

I'm interested in reading animation, horror, sci fy, suspense, fantasy, and anything that is good.  I enjoy writing the same.  Looking to team with anyone!

Thanks
Dan
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Dustin
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 2:17pm Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


Action speaks louder...

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Quoted from Max


I'm now employing his "white space" technique, basically.. you just break all the action up into the shots...



That's not his technique... that's just how you're meant to write screenplays.


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Max
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 3:59pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Dustin


That's not his technique... that's just how you're meant to write screenplays.


Fair enough but some great screenplays ain't written like that, and of course I'm talking about some of the professional scripts

Look at Zodiac script, that is riddled with domino action and it reads like a dream...

But of course that doesn't mean it's grammatically right but it's a snappy read.


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Mr. Blonde
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 4:07pm Report to Moderator
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True, but it was also written over the span of a decade. =)


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JSimon
Posted: May 28th, 2015, 4:08pm Report to Moderator
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There's no such thing as screenplay "grammar", Fenigus. There are guidelines and traditions that have developed over time, but these are always changing and are to a large degree artificially constructed by those trying to teach screenplay writing. There's no such thing as "correct" screenwriting. Honor the traditions by making your work look and smell like a screenplay, but don't obsess over rules that don't exist. The only real rule is what works best. Of course, be grateful to those that take the time to help like Dreamscale.
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