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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    One Week Challenge    December, 2011 Urban Legend OWC  ›  True Myth - ULOWC
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  Author    True Myth - ULOWC  (currently 6085 views)
Posted: July 10th, 2015, 1:26pm Report to Moderator
Been Around

Buenos Aires - Argentina
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Hi Bill,

Fun premise, it's like Ghostbusters but with the heroes chasing myths instead of ghosts. There were some funny gags, like the name puns.

The only comment I have is that there seems to be a slight deviation in the narrative when the heroes are paired with the psychic. Instead of hunting myths, the focus seems to shift to preventing real disasters like plane crashes. Not bad, but I felt like the main conflict could have unfolded in a way more organic to the premise. Then in the denouement you do bring everything back to the myth camp, which was cool.

I see a previous reader suggested including an evil twin organization. That could be fun to consider if you ever revisit this.

Best of luck!

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Posted: July 10th, 2015, 4:55pm Report to Moderator
January Project Group

Southern California
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Quite clever.

Although - I think not having a MAJOR PAYNE or MAJOR DICK in there somewhere was a MAJOR MISTAKE;)

My Scripts can all be seen here:
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Reef Dreamer
Posted: July 11th, 2015, 5:58am Report to Moderator
Old Timer

Part time writer

The Island of Jersey
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Always strange when someone reads an old script out of the blue. You then see it on the thread and think, gosh that's a simailr name to mine...oh it is.

Thanks both for the read.

Yeah, this is just a bunch of silliness but I enjoyed it.

MAJOR did I miss that. The possibilities are endless. I already can see a conversation between two MAJORS , like MAJOR ASS and MAJOR DICK which would then be altered by the arrival of a hot female soldier called MAJOR LEAGUE. It would start off with one mocking him for his MAJOR DICK name, only for a reversal whereby he's trying to promote his MAJOR DICK...wink wink.

Better get back to the real world.

My scripts  HERE

The Elevator Most Belonging To Alice - Semi Final Bluecat, Runner Up Nashville
Inner Journey - Page Awards Finalist - Bluecat semi final
Grieving Spell - winner - London Film Awards.  Third - Honolulu
Ultimate Weapon - Fresh Voices - second place
IMDb link...
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Posted: July 11th, 2015, 6:19am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients

Action speaks louder...

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Major Haas would be better than straight up ass. It works better when they are actual names. Best not be too on the nose.

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