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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Horror Scripts  ›  The 1997 Texas Chain Saw Massacre Moderators: bert
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  Author    The 1997 Texas Chain Saw Massacre  (currently 1359 views)
Zack
Posted: October 16th, 2021, 11:17am Report to Moderator
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Don't get it right. Get it written.

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Hey, James.

Could have sworn I responded to this. Thanks a ton for the awesome review. I know you and I already chatted about all this on the phone, but I still wanted to respond to your review and tell you how much it means to me that you didn't hate this. Thank you for all the awesome advice you've been giving me, Dude. Only helping me grow as a writer.



An example of my writing...

FOR SATAN - short, horror, 14 pgs (revised draft) - A group of thrill-seekers explore a creepy old house on Halloween night. Think you know this story? Think again.
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Kirsten
Posted: October 18th, 2021, 5:21am Report to Moderator
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Giving up is not an option....

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Hey Zack, I'll definitely give this a read tonight... I don't know if this will make you jealous, a modified version of my short The Camper is being used in the horror Anthology 'The Macabre' that has Grandpa from the original TCM in it. He isn't in my short but one of the other stories lol..... heck if I never sell a screenplay I can always have bragging rights with that.... maybe lol..... The original toxic avenger Mark Torgi is in my one lol.


"Turn that off, our friend has just been killed in a fatal sunlight accident!"....

'What we do in the Shadows.'
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Zack
Posted: October 20th, 2021, 11:12am Report to Moderator
January Project Group


Don't get it right. Get it written.

Location
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Posts
4103
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Quoted from Kirsten
Hey Zack, I'll definitely give this a read tonight... I don't know if this will make you jealous, a modified version of my short The Camper is being used in the horror Anthology 'The Macabre' that has Grandpa from the original TCM in it. He isn't in my short but one of the other stories lol..... heck if I never sell a screenplay I can always have bragging rights with that.... maybe lol..... The original toxic avenger Mark Torgi is in my one lol.


That's so awesome, Kirsten! Congrats! I'm super jelly. lol Can't wait to hear more about that project. Also, how is your feature coming along? Last we talked, you were still hard at work on it. Hope I get to read it soon.

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts on this script. I believe I've come up with a fun and nasty chainsaw flick.


An example of my writing...

FOR SATAN - short, horror, 14 pgs (revised draft) - A group of thrill-seekers explore a creepy old house on Halloween night. Think you know this story? Think again.
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Zombie Sean
Posted: October 23rd, 2021, 11:17am Report to Moderator
Old Timer


A boozer, a user, and a two-time loser

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Page 1:

Breathes should be “breaths”

Page 2:

Like the image of a flash of the camera bulb revealing a decomposed corpse.

Page 3:

Good imagery of the corpse. Disturbing stuff.

I think the FADE TO: transition should be DISSOLVE TO:? Not sure. Never seen FADE TO: be used to as a transition before, but what do I know!

“Scenic countryside”? Oh please, Texas is NOT scenic in the least bit. Flat and boring! ;P

Page 4:

I think you should introduce the MAN as Chuck right away.

Page 5:

Chuck mouthing the words “It’s okay” I think should be written in the action lines versus making it dialogue since he doesn’t actually say it. It’s an action that he’s doing instead of literally saying it.

Page 6:

What’s this twitch that Chuck does but plays it off by scratching his neck? I’m curious.

Page 10:

Amy’s response to Chuck’s color game had me chuckling.

Page 12:

I think you should mention that there’s a kid in the road, before Chuck points it out in his dialogue.

Page 16:

I don’t know if the flash of the bulb would cause too much ruckus during the day time. If it were nighttime outside and she did that, that would probably be more logical. Kind of like driving at night with the interior lights on, it makes it hard to see. So when their eyes are adjusted to the nighttime, and she takes the photo with the flash, THEN they could freak out.

Page 17:

otherside should be “other side”

Page 19:

outragous should be “outrageous”

Page 23:

Cook’s dialogue, “An they” should be “and* they”

Page 25:

I’ve got a bad feeling about this BBQ…

Page 29:

Amy’s concern about the hitchhiker following them might be a stretch. She’s a young girl whom they kicked out of the car miles away from where they are now. I would think, a couple miles at least. Also, how does the hitchhiker know where they are?

Page 39:

Chuck is officially an idiot. Picking up hitchhikers and investigating an old farmhouse after his daughter clearly said that there was blood and bad things happening. How has he made it this far in life!? AND he takes his son with him!?

Page 46:

It’s nighttime. Why aren’t Lisa and Amy worried about where Chuck and Brandon are if it’s been this long?

Page 47:

Now Lisa is going to investigate!? Sorry dude, but these characters are dumber than a sack of rocks! Amy seems to be the only level-headed person of this family. Survival of the fittest, amirite?

Page 51:

I would have sincerely hoped Amy would’ve ran to the station wagon rather than the old farmhouse, but alas.

Page 52:

Breath should be Breathe

Page 56:

Wait, Brandon just said his legs can barely move yet he charges Leatherface. We need a little consistency here.

Page 58:

Pretty fucked that Amy has to dig through her mother’s mutilated corpse to find the keys.

Page 60:

Damn! Amy just jumped out the second story window and she’s still able to move like that?? Maybe have her roll down the roof before dropping to the ground to kind of help break her fall?

Page 68:

Haha, I’m sorry, but I laughed when the Cook just spins the hitchhiker around and backhands her too after doing the same thing to Amy.

Page 72:

“Texas IS Hell” You’ve got that right! Hahaha

Page 80:

Officer #1 PEEKS (not peak). Same with page 81.

Page 82:

As he FALLS to his knees (missing word)

Love the Dawn of the Dead 2004-esque ending credits sequence. Good stuff.

———

This was a wild ride. Tons of fun, gore, and violence. Definitely was not disappointed by this, coming from you, Zack.

Whilst there were some really stupid decisions made by our characters, in the end they get their comeuppance (and what’s a horror movie without stupid decisions that leads characters to their deaths?). It moved the story forward and without those decisions, there would be no movie.

I like the homage to the original TCM—the old hippie van in the car graveyard, the dinner table scene. This is a good reimagining (if you want to call it that) of the original TCM. Really scary stuff, really brutal and violent scenes.

It’s a shame Ollie died, but I wouldn’t expect anything else from you. That part was a shock, I actually said aloud, “Oh shit!” When they got hit by the SUV. And poor Sean! ;P

While this script could use a bit of cleaning up, I can tell you worked real hard on all of this. Great chase scenes too, really dragged them out and I was getting tired while reading (in a good way), as if I were getting tired with Amy as she just kept running and running and running. Damn, she’s got the adrenaline of all humans combined together!

Let me know if I need to touch on anything else, Zack. This is a great fan script and I can totally see it being added to the TCM franchise if it were ever picked up. Though, the song usages in the script would set your budget way high, however this would be fun to watch on the big screen.

Best of luck.

Sean


CLICK HERE FOR MY WEBSITE AND OTHER SCRIPTS

Bad Dreams - Short, Horror
Swan Song - Short, Drama (for the September 2021 OWC)
The Dead Body - Feature, Horror
Don't Go In The Shed - Short, Horror
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Kirsten
Posted: October 24th, 2021, 4:31am Report to Moderator
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Giving up is not an option....

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Hey Zack, yep I'm chipping away at that feature ....I'm up to page 22 on your script and i've really enjoyed what I've read so far. Organic, great atmosphere and characterization. Looking forward to reading the rest.


"Turn that off, our friend has just been killed in a fatal sunlight accident!"....

'What we do in the Shadows.'
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Zack
Posted: October 27th, 2021, 10:57am Report to Moderator
January Project Group


Don't get it right. Get it written.

Location
Cincinnati
Posts
4103
Posts Per Day
0.71

Quoted from Kirsten
Hey Zack, yep I'm chipping away at that feature ....I'm up to page 22 on your script and i've really enjoyed what I've read so far. Organic, great atmosphere and characterization. Looking forward to reading the rest.


Looking forward to hearing what you think about the nastier parts of the script.  


An example of my writing...

FOR SATAN - short, horror, 14 pgs (revised draft) - A group of thrill-seekers explore a creepy old house on Halloween night. Think you know this story? Think again.
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