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In Search of Hysterical Jesus (currently 6732 views) |
Don |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 11:36am |
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AdministratorAdministrator So, what are you writing?
LocationVirginia Posts16561 Posts Per Day 1.92 |
In Search of Hysterical Jesus by David Lambertson - Comedy - When a famous atheist comedian literally dies on stage, he makes a bargain with God to avoid damnation - make the bible funny. 108 pages - pdf format CW: Would not recommend for anyone who might be offended by religious related humor.
Writer interested in feedback on this work |
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------------- You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take. - Wayne Gretzky
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Revision History (4 edits; 1 reasons shown) |
Don - April 18th, 2020, 9:34am | revised draft | | |
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Matthew Taylor |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 12:31pm |
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Old Timer
LocationShakespeare's county Posts1819 Posts Per Day 0.84 |
Hi David
I saw your thread about this a few days ago, so when this popped up I started giving it a read at work.
Unfortunately I have to stop at page 7 - I say unfortunately, because I am bloody loving it so far lol I only have to stop because my shift has actually finished and I have to drive home.
I can't wait to read more - I have nothing useful to add at the moment, I'm really liking the characterisations, the dialogue - so far I'm liking it all.
Regards
Matt |
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42.2
Two steps to writing a good screenplay: 1) Write a bad one 2) Fix it |
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eldave1 |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 1:01pm |
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January Project Group
LocationSouthern California Posts6874 Posts Per Day 1.86 |
Hi David
I saw your thread about this a few days ago, so when this popped up I started giving it a read at work.
Unfortunately I have to stop at page 7 - I say unfortunately, because I am bloody loving it so far lol I only have to stop because my shift has actually finished and I have to drive home.
I can't wait to read more - I have nothing useful to add at the moment, I'm really liking the characterisations, the dialogue - so far I'm liking it all.
Regards
Matt |
Thanks, Matt. Appreciate it. |
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MarkItZero |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 3:50pm |
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Old Timer
Posts1006 Posts Per Day 0.33 |
Dave, that was awesome. I think your writing went to a whole other level on this one. And before it was page finalist level so I don't even know what it's at now. So many great moves... Sharon's new boyfriend's occupation... the familiar faces at the wedding...
I should note I am beyond ignorant about any religious stuff or really most basic history. None of which interfered with my enjoyment of the script. In case you were wondering how it reads for someone who's not religious at all.
I hope I have time to do notes before you send this in to contests. Not that it needs it, but hopefully I can give some feedback in the next couple weeks or so. |
| That rug really tied the room together. |
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eldave1 |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 4:29pm |
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January Project Group
LocationSouthern California Posts6874 Posts Per Day 1.86 |
Thanks, mate. Much appreciated |
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Zack |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 4:36pm |
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Of The Ancients Show. Don't tell.
LocationErlanger, KY Posts4579 Posts Per Day 0.68 |
Comedy usually isn't my thing, but the logline definitely peaked my interest. I'll download it and read it at work whenever the boss isn't watching. Zack |
| Don't get it right. Get it written. |
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eldave1 |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 4:42pm |
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January Project Group
LocationSouthern California Posts6874 Posts Per Day 1.86 |
Comedy usually isn't my thing, but the logline definitely peaked my interest. I'll download it and read it at work whenever the boss isn't watching. Zack |
Thanks |
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HyperMatt |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 6:56pm |
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New
LocationLondon, UK Posts440 Posts Per Day 0.16 |
Would you say this is along the same lines as ‘The Life of Brian’ Dave? |
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Mr.Ripley |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 7:01pm |
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January Project Group Writing
LocationNew York Posts1979 Posts Per Day 0.30 |
Will definitely read this. What’s CW stand for?
Gabe |
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eldave1 |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 7:05pm |
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January Project Group
LocationSouthern California Posts6874 Posts Per Day 1.86 |
Would you say this is along the same lines as ‘The Life of Brian’ Dave? |
A little |
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eldave1 |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 7:08pm |
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January Project Group
LocationSouthern California Posts6874 Posts Per Day 1.86 |
Will definitely read this. What’s CW stand for?
Gabe |
CW? |
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Mr.Ripley |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 7:09pm |
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January Project Group Writing
LocationNew York Posts1979 Posts Per Day 0.30 |
CW: Would not recommend for anyone who might be offended by religious related humor. |
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eldave1 |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 7:25pm |
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January Project Group
LocationSouthern California Posts6874 Posts Per Day 1.86 |
Don't know what it stands for. It is my note when I posted |
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eldave1 |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 7:25pm |
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January Project Group
LocationSouthern California Posts6874 Posts Per Day 1.86 |
Don't know what it stands for. It is my note when I posted |
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Mr.Ripley |
Posted: January 7th, 2019, 7:30pm |
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January Project Group Writing
LocationNew York Posts1979 Posts Per Day 0.30 |
No problem then. Read 10 pgs. Will continue to read further. |
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