SimplyScripts Discussion Board
Blog Home - Produced Movie Script Library - TV Scripts - Unproduced Scripts - Contact - Site Map
ScriptSearch
Welcome, Guest.
It is August 15th, 2020, 1:09am
Please login or register.
Was PortalRecent PostsHome Help Calendar Search Register Login
If you wish to join this discussion board, please send me a message. Please do read the guidelines that govern behavior on the discussion board. It will make for a much more pleasant experience for everyone. A word about SimplyScripts and Censorship


Scripts Studios are posting for 2019 - 2020 award consideration
Week 5 Scores and Who Wrote What of the
The Writer's Tournament
.

Short Script of the Day | Featured Script of the Month | Featured Short Scripts Available for Production | Submit Your Script

How do I get my film's link and banner here?
All screenplays on the simplyscripts.com and simplyscripts.net domain are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved. This screenplaymay not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.
Forum Login
Username: Create a new Account
Password:     Forgot Password

SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Screenwriting Discussion    Screenwriting Class  ›  Advice on Writing Fight Scenes Moderators: George Willson
Users Browsing Forum
No Members and 1 Guests

 Pages: 1
Recommend Print
  Author    Advice on Writing Fight Scenes  (currently 189 views)
ChristopherW
Posted: July 29th, 2020, 5:48pm Report to Moderator
New-ish


Posts
9
Posts Per Day
0.49
Hi,

I have read and seen different examples of this and I am not sure which is correct. When  writing a fight scene do you capitalise certain actions or sound effects etc?

eg
TWO people in masks appear and are wearing the same armour as the ones who attacked Sarah. They go to draw GUNS. Broo SPRINGS OFF THE WALL and flies at the first assailant biting his hand with a SNAP.

or would i just write it normally.

all advice appreciated.
Logged Offline
Private Message
LC
Posted: July 29th, 2020, 7:56pm Report to Moderator
Moderator


Do you like to eat pie after a good movie?

Location
The Great Southern Land
Posts
4538
Posts Per Day
1.05
Hi Christopher, and welcome to SS!

I'm not a big Action writer, so...

I have seen sounds capped and even that can be overdone imho. Here's a couple of links.

https://gointothestory.blcklst.....scripts-c4e589c5fbeb
https://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?m-1407932475/s-14/highlight-+Action+scenes/#num14

That second link is more to do with SLUGS in action but might be helpful too.

Having said that I'll let one of the more seasoned Action writers respond in more detail.

There's a Writer's Tournament going on here at SS which might explain why you're not being inundated with answers at the moment.

A few links for you FYI the site:

https://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-cc/m-1124159895/s-0/
https://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?b-knowyou/

And, a scene from BOURNE IDENTITY:


EXT. BELLEVILLE -- STREET -- DAY

        And BOURNE and MARIE are running.  And he is reaching into
        his pocket -- fishing around -- and just as he pulls out the
        car keys -- we recognize this as the street they parked
        their car on and --

        BY MARIE's CAR

        BOURNE unlocks the door -- pops MARIE's open.  And --

        THERE'S A COP -- yelling at them and -- BOURNE hits the
        gas -- they fly out of their parking space -- BAM!!  The COP
        fires, shattering their windshield and there -- up ahead --
        THE PROFESSOR coming out -- about to FIRE -- BOURNE aims for
        him -- forces him to dive out of the way and --

        ONE QUICK MOVE around a TRUCK and they are free.

        INT. THE LITTLE RED CAR

        BOURNE and MARIE looking back nervously -- so far all over --

        ON THE STREET

        The PROFESSOR looking around.  PEOPLE staring at him --
        covered in blood -- the COP racing up -- yelling -- not
        yelling for long because the PROFESSOR is firing at him and --

        Now the PROFESSOR is moving -- not running -- just a swift
        walk and now he's past the truck -- and --

        A MOTORCYCLIST comes flying down the street -- oblivious --
        going way too fast for these streets and -- the PROFESSOR
        swings his gun stock like a bat -- takes him out -- clean
        and smooth -- bike crashing to the ground and --

        The PROFESSOR grabs the bike and takes off -- SHOOTING at
        TWO POLICE CARS just racing to the scene and we are into --

        EXT. BELLEVILLE BLVD -- DAY

        HIGH SPEED CAR CHASE.  And BOURNE better do some fancy
        driving because here comes the PROFESSOR -- and he's a lot
        faster -- much better armed.

        INT. MARIE'S CAR

        BOURNE driving.  MARIE looking back -- seeing the PROFESSOR
        gain on them --

                             MARIE
                   xxxxxx

                             BOURNE
                   xxxxxx

        And -- THE PROFESSOR FIRES -- SHREDS the back off their car --

                             MARIE
                   Give me the gun --

        And now she's got his shotgun, leaning out the window.

                             BOURNE
                   Wait 'till he's close.

        BOURNE swerves, up on the sidewalk back onto the street --
        slaloms through the traffic -- racing towards an intersection
        and --

        IN THE INTERSECTION

        CARS coming the other way, BOURNE just makes it through --
        the PROFESSOR tries to squeeze through -- skidding and --

        CRACK!  The PROFESSOR hits the front of a car sideways on
        his bike -- he is THROWN clear through the intersection,
        right into the windshield of an oncoming car and --

        He gets up, grabs his gun and works his way towards his bike
        and now we see --

        EXT. VARIOUS SHOTS AROUND PARIS -- DAY

        COPS are mobilizing -- swarming into this area and --

        BACK TO THE CAR CHASE --

        BOURNE and MARIE pick up a few cops on their tail -- shed
        all of them -- the last car goes into an EXPLOSIVE FLIP --
        the PROFESSOR is now right behind them.  And now we are into --

        CRAZY CAR CHASE WITH COPS RIGHT ON THEIR TAIL

        BOURNE, MARIE and the PROFESSOR leave a trail of totaled
        cars that the cops have to try and navigate through --
        finally saying fuck it and hitting a few cars themselves and
        now we are into --

        CAR CHASE THROUGH NARROW STREETS

        MARIE'S CAR and the MOTORCYCLE can pass where the police
        cars cannot.  BOURNE may be able to shed the cops, but not
        the PROFESSOR.  And now one quick move and they are --

        EXT. QUAI -- DAY

        Racing against traffic up the Seine.  Past the Louvre.  COPS
        pursuing on the other side of the river.  BOURNE and the
        PROFESSOR leaving behind a trail of carnage.  And now --

        The PROFESSOR is pulling up along side them -- one lane over.
        Both swerving to avoid oncoming cars and --

        MARIE FIRES -- TWICE -- TAKES out a few windshields.  The
        PROFESSOR fires at the same time -- MARIE'S CAR DOOR --
        GONE -- she's totally exposed but --

        THE PROFESSOR -- his BIKE is SPOUTING GAS -- one of the
        pellets nailed his tank.

        BOURNE AND MARIE --

                             MARIE
                   xxxxxx

        THE PROFESSOR -- No problem -- he's unwrapping a piece of
        duct tape from the barrel of his gun -- two seconds and the
        hole is patched and -- BOURNE AND MARIE -- the side of the
        car is completely gone -- the PROFESSOR is gaining -- across
        the river dozens of police cars are racing alongside.  Many
        more can be seen on their side -- a road block ahead --
        running out of options and --

        BOURNE turns hard -- crashes over the sidewalk and flies
        down a side street.  A POLICE CAR pulls out behind them --
        the PROFESSOR can't stop -- skidding hard, turning the bike
        sideways, skidding out -- sliding across the ground and
        BAMMM!!!  SMASHING into a GLASS PHONE BOOTH which shatters.

        And he's up -- lifting up his bike and --

        BOURNE AND MARIE

        SIX POLICE CARS on their tail -- more joining.  Every street
        they look down has POLICE CARS racing in parallel.  Running
        out of options and in the background --

        THE PROFESSOR is back in the game -- passing the police cars
        and up ahead --

        THE ROAD IS BLOCKED.  POLICE ROAD BLOCK -- cops with guns.
        Gotta act quick and -- BOURNE turns hard left -- there's a
        metro staircase -- only way out and --

        THEY BOUNCE down the stairs.  CRASH through the doors down
        below.

        THE FIRST POLICE CAR -- no way he's following.  SLAMMING on
        his brakes.  SKIDDING to a halt -- SKIDDING sideways --
        gonna stop in time -- just at the edge of the steps and then --

        THE SECOND POLICE CAR isn't braking -- T-BONES the first
        car -- BAM!!! -- sends it rolling sideways down the steps
        until it crashes to a halt at the bottom -- upside down.

Download Collateral pdf script too. A personal fav of mine.
Interesting examples of CAPS used in that.

I gather you're writing a Spec so my advice would be to use minimally, and only highlight crucial stuff at risk of it being annoying to the read.

Jmho.






Short Fuse OWC Writer's Choice
Scooter
Mollycoddled
Logged
Private Message Reply: 1 - 13
Lon
Posted: July 29th, 2020, 8:51pm Report to Moderator
Been around a while



Location
Louisville
Posts
347
Posts Per Day
0.06
You'll get varying answers. Some writers prefer to write out their action scenes punch for punch, kick for kick, gunshot for gunshot. Others prefer to generalize and only emphasize key moments. Others still prefer to simply write "they fight" or "the cops chase the bad guys."  All that really matters is clarity. As long as your reader can easily follow the action, write it as you will.

As for CAPPING certain things, traditionally the only thing you would cap in action/narratives are character intros and sound FX, and capping sound FX isn't really a thing anymore. A lot of modern writers have taken to using bold font in place of caps for such things, but really, it's not necessary or required. So really it's your choice. My only advice would be to not over-do it.  If you think reading someone writing in all caps on the internet can be annoying, imagine having to do it for ninety pages.

Good luck. Keep writing.
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 2 - 13
JEStaats
Posted: July 29th, 2020, 9:32pm Report to Moderator
Old Timer



Location
Tucson, AZ
Posts
1188
Posts Per Day
0.81
LC - That was an awesome example with Bourne. IMHO, just the right tone but the caps seem way overdone. The writing itself is classic in visualizing but not directing (helps that I've seen the movie 20 times).
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 3 - 13
LC
Posted: July 29th, 2020, 9:36pm Report to Moderator
Moderator


Do you like to eat pie after a good movie?

Location
The Great Southern Land
Posts
4538
Posts Per Day
1.05
Me too!  A great movie's test of time is that you can watch it over and over and it's still good.


Short Fuse OWC Writer's Choice
Scooter
Mollycoddled
Logged
Private Message Reply: 4 - 13
BarryJohn
Posted: July 30th, 2020, 5:40am Report to Moderator
Been around a while


Who am I? A man with a hundred stories..

Location
South Africa
Posts
220
Posts Per Day
0.35
Use CAPS sparingly as they tend to break the flow of reading... Above example of BOURNE is how not to do it (in my opinion). I stutter in reading it. It has no flow, and as an action scene, it must flow FAST. Further too, we CAP our characters on introduction only. In above short extract PROFESSOR was caped 22 TIMES! We got who he is...              

          QUOTE:
        THERE'S A COP -- yelling at them and -- BOURNE hits the
††††††††gas -- they fly out of their parking space -- BAM!!††The COP
††††††††fires, shattering their windshield and there -- up ahead --
††††††††THE PROFESSOR coming out -- about to FIRE -- BOURNE aims for
††††††††him -- forces him to dive out of the way and --

          I'D WRITE AS:
        There's a cop -- YELLING at them and -- Bourne hits the
††††††††gas -- they fly out of their parking space -- BAM!!††The cop
††††††††fires, shattering their windshield and there -- up ahead --
††††††††the professor coming out -- about to fire -- Bourne aims for
††††††††him -- forces him to dive out of the way and --

You'll find LC's links to be very helpful. You may also want to visit; screencraft.com its packed with tutorials of all formatting... plus more.  


Who am I? A man with a hundred stories.. You want to read one?

I live in the most beautiful country of South Africa. I'm a self employed electronics security technician. I'm four years into script writing ~ trying to make it in this ever competitive††industry.††

Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 5 - 13
ChristopherW
Posted: July 30th, 2020, 11:21am Report to Moderator
New-ish


Posts
9
Posts Per Day
0.49
Thanks everyone, I really appreciate all the advice. I will put it to good use.


Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 6 - 13
FrankM
Posted: July 30th, 2020, 12:57pm Report to Moderator
Old Timer



Location
Between Chair and Keyboard
Posts
1311
Posts Per Day
1.34

Quoted from BarryJohn
Use CAPS sparingly as they tend to break the flow of reading... Above example of BOURNE is how not to do it (in my opinion). I stutter in reading it. It has no flow, and as an action scene, it must flow FAST. Further too, we CAP our characters on introduction only. In above short extract PROFESSOR was caped 22 TIMES! We got who he is...              

          QUOTE:
        THERE'S A COP -- yelling at them and -- BOURNE hits the
††††††††gas -- they fly out of their parking space -- BAM!!††The COP
††††††††fires, shattering their windshield and there -- up ahead --
††††††††THE PROFESSOR coming out -- about to FIRE -- BOURNE aims for
††††††††him -- forces him to dive out of the way and --

          I'D WRITE AS:
        There's a cop -- YELLING at them and -- Bourne hits the
††††††††gas -- they fly out of their parking space -- BAM!!††The cop
††††††††fires, shattering their windshield and there -- up ahead --
††††††††the professor coming out -- about to fire -- Bourne aims for
††††††††him -- forces him to dive out of the way and --

You'll find LC's links to be very helpful. You may also want to visit; screencraft.com its packed with tutorials of all formatting... plus more.  


You'll also see some writers will cap important NOUNS, which really ought to be reserved for unexpected things you want to make 100% sure the reader doesn't miss.

The cop pulls a gun.
The cashier pulls a GUN.


In my opinion, if a character was important enough to be CAPPED on intro (that is, will have lines or appear in more than one scene), then the name should be Capitalized every other time it appears. So, I would have written Cop and Professor above.

I do find myself putting character names in all-caps in wrylies, since I'm referring to them by their dialog labels. I also tend to use caps in dialog as a replacement for bolding, which a couple folks here find annoying.

                           ALICE
                       (whispers to BOB)
                   The last thing we want is for
                   your mother to MOVE IN with us.


Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 7 - 13
Lon
Posted: July 30th, 2020, 8:13pm Report to Moderator
Been around a while



Location
Louisville
Posts
347
Posts Per Day
0.06

Quoted from FrankM
I do find myself putting character names in all-caps in wrylies, since I'm referring to them by their dialog labels. I also tend to use caps in dialog as a replacement for bolding, which a couple folks here find annoying.

                           ALICE
                       (whispers to BOB)
                   The last thing we want is for
                   your mother to MOVE IN with us.


Folks find it annoying because it's the writer trying to do the actor's job for them. Actors don't appreciate it, either. They don't tell you how to write your script, you don't tell them how to deliver a line. The occasional wryly is fine if you're having trouble getting the tone across in the context of the scene itself, but in general, trust that the actor will put as much thought into their performance as you did in your writing and will find the tone themselves. That's their job, afterall, and is what they train to do.
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 8 - 13
MarkRenshaw
Posted: July 31st, 2020, 12:03pm Report to Moderator
Old Timer



Location
UK
Posts
1861
Posts Per Day
0.70
For some reason, my PDF reader is not allowing me to select text so instead of examples, I suggest getting hold of Kingsman - The Secret Service screenplay, go to page 21 and see how they describe the famous bar fight scene. This is another way to handle fight scenes and, in my mind, stops the reader drifting off due to unnecessary detail.


For more of my scripts, stories, produced movies and the ocassional blog, check out my new website. CLICK
Logged Offline
Site Private Message Reply: 9 - 13
FrankM
Posted: July 31st, 2020, 1:40pm Report to Moderator
Old Timer



Location
Between Chair and Keyboard
Posts
1311
Posts Per Day
1.34

Quoted from Lon
trust that the actor will put as much thought into their performance as you did in your writing and will find the tone themselves. That's their job, afterall, and is what they train to do.


The actor I trust. It's the studio readers I'm worried about


Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 10 - 13
eldave1
Posted: August 1st, 2020, 12:53pm Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients



Location
Southern California
Posts
5878
Posts Per Day
2.67
On CAPS - you'll get as many answers as there are writers.

CAPs on characters first introduced is a must, whether they are named or not.

Everything else is a matter of choice,

My personal opinion is that CAPS are for emphasis and when you overuse them they lose the emphasis that they were designed for in the first place.

For "sounds, actions, and object" - my own personal rule is to limit them to instances where the sound, action, or object is meant to startle - s hock - surprise.


My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 11 - 13
Lon
Posted: August 1st, 2020, 7:52pm Report to Moderator
Been around a while



Location
Louisville
Posts
347
Posts Per Day
0.06
Edited for being too preachy. Disregard.

Revision History (1 edits)
Lon  -  August 2nd, 2020, 8:32am
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 12 - 13
Max Ruddock
Posted: August 2nd, 2020, 1:29pm Report to Moderator
Been around a while



Location
UK
Posts
215
Posts Per Day
0.13
I think Lonís first post (especially in regards to keeping it minimal) is spot on. I did a bunch of stunt work years ago and was surprised by how little action was actually written, and this was for proper chopsocky stuff too.
Logged
Private Message Reply: 13 - 13
 Pages: 1
Recommend Print

Locked Board Board Index    Screenwriting Class  [ previous | next ] Switch to:
Was Portal Recent Posts Home Help Calendar Search Register Login

Forum Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post polls
You may not post attachments
HTML is on
Blah Code is on
Smilies are on


Powered by E-Blah Platinum 9.71B © 2001-2006

*No, it isn't