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This was sick indeed, but I like sick, so good job.
Well written, especially the beginning. Made my skin crawl. It reminded me a little too much of psycho to be perfect and I thought the mother switched from being a sicko herself to condemning Jeremy a little too easily.
Yikes... very, very, very, very disturbing tale this one is... but it is very, very good.
Everything in this was almost cringing material... I've never been a fan of incest in films... I hope no one really is... but it is surely horror that you've wrote, whoever you are.
All I can say is the story itself is, somewhat, recognisable in some aspects of it... I'm not sure where from but I can see it. It's not totally unique but you've definitely won a prize for the best genre and subject integration.
It's well written but with a few grammar/spelling mistakes. The ending is great. The killing of Robert nearly made me puke but it worked. This is the best I've read so far.
What word can I use that wasn't used by the above posters? Um....Demented? Incest? Disgusting?
Well, at least it fits in the category. This was very disturbing indeed, and my facial expressions were changing every few lines. Even I can't imagine somebody doing that, and this made me cringe, and as I have stated before, it takes a lot to make me cringe.
I'm not gonna be so diplomatic as the others. This was bad on many levels. Being sick and twisted is not a virtue in and of itself. Whoever you are, you need to learn this.
If there was a point or a moral to this story then I would have been open-minded about it.
In fairness this was competently written. Those were my honest feelings though so I have to stick by them. Just one question - what exactly was your inspiration for this piece. On second thought, I don't want to know.
"If at first, the idea is not absurd, then there is no hope for it." - Albert Einstein
I liked it but I don't think it was as disgusting or disturbing as a lot of you people do, which either means I'm a rational human being or a disgusting freak, either way the entire premise of Freudian psychology is that every man wants to sleep with his mother and kill his father.
But anyway, it was a well written piece, pretty creepy. It actually has some potential as a feature, although 90 pages of a son making love to his mother may be a little too much for an audience to handle, so maybe we should just leave it at that. Well done.
I think the author of this one will want to remain anonymous indefinitely
I can't say I "enjoyed" it but it was certainly compelling and quite unsettling. I think the reason it's so disturbing is the Freudian aspect. The premise is not entirely unbelievable if you are to believe Freud's theories on the subject. That is what makes this one so unsettling.
Anyway, it's well written and well paced, but I think it could have been handled with a bit more subtlety. A few parts were just gratuitous and could probably have been implied to greater effect.
Overall, this stuck to the genre and theme very well and it definitely turned my stomach. Nice job.
Oh, and I have a feeling I know the maggot who wrote this one
Wow...I just....wow...ummm....this was....wow. Words can't really describe this one. demented is an understatement. But i really liked this though, to some degree. In the terms that what I expect out of a horror is to make you unsettled and expose you to something that you don't necessarily want to be exposed to. So, in a way we should all thank you for the pleasant torture of reading this.
But even storyline aside, this was well written, and paced well. Very sick stuff. Great job.
"Picture Porky Pig raping Elmer Fudd" - George Carlin "I have to sign before you shoot me?" - Navin Johnson "It'll take time to restore chaos" - George W. Bush "Harry, I love you!" - Ben Affleck "What are you looking at, sugar t*ts?" - The man without a face "Whoever does any work on the Sabbath day must be put to death." - Exodus 31:15 "No one ever expects The Spanish Inquisition!" - The Spanish Inquisition "Matt Damon" - Matt Damon
This one fit the challenge alright, so congrats on that. It was well written, but sick, like the others before me have said... Real sick. Not my kind of horror, but that's okay. It still gave me the creeps, and that is what this challenge was supposed to do. Right?
Award winning screenwriter Available screenplays TINA DARLING - 114 page Comedy ONLY OSCAR KNOWS - 99 page Horror A SONG IN MY HEART - 94 page Drama HALLOWEEN GAMES - 105 page Drama
Being sick and twisted is not a virtue in and of itself.
I agree, mgj. But while there might have been a little of that going on here, I found a complete story, with justifications (such as they are) for the way our characters behaved, and a certain logic (such as it is) in the telling.
Quoted from Martin
Oh, and I have a feeling...
Agreed. That's part of the reason I am a little more willing to accept this story at face value than others might be. Good job to the author. This isn't my favorite of these, but I found plenty here to like, as well.
ugh. this was gross. But it was well written. The voice over worked well. Have you ever seen a movie called "Sleepwalkers"? The mother and son relationship reminds me of that movie. Queston: How is the mother still producing milk when she had a kid 19 years ago. Your title makes sense and is more suited to the story than the other "Spoiled". Um..that all. good job.