May Challenge Round One


The Intruder by Anonymous - A man is surprised to find an intruder in his house. But that isn't the end of the evening's surprises.  Short, Horror

Feeling Guilty by Richard Gecko - An exhausted man feels guilty about taking a break from a large-scale search.  Short, Horror

Through a Child's eyes by Blank - An innocent Mother/Daughter conversation leads to more than the Mother bargained for.  Short, Thriller

Just a Little Nudge? by The Impatient One - In the near future, a real estate developer plots how to remove an endangered species from some very expensive land.  Short, Sci Fi

Star Light, Star Bright by Anon - A young girl's wish to see her mother again inadvertently comes true with horrific consequences.  Short, Sci Fi

The Shadows by Severus Nettleship - A scared woman takes to the City's shadowy alleyways to escape her pursuer.  Short, Thriller

Smiler by Smiley Emoji - A man with a freakish frozen smile on his face follows a woman down a deserted side street, determined to carry out his duty.   Short, Horror

The Enigma Complex by Riddle Burrito - Two young urban apartment hunters are introduced to the latest style of inner city living.   Short, Sci Fi

Undercurrent by Teresa Green - Things aren't quite as they seem when a family man learns of a tragic accident.  Short, Thriller

Mind the Gap by The Smell of Ozone, Grit, and Broken Dreams - An early morning encounter on a subway platform ends in a flash.  Short, Thriller

The Guileless by #123 - A woman sees a little boy on an empty street in the middle of the night.  Short, Horror

Midnight Mangler by David Berkowitz - In a city gripped by fear, the Midnight Mangler stalks his next victim.  Short, Horror

What Goes Around by Ka-Bar - A killer's past catches up to him.  Short, Horror

Monster by XOXO - A teenage girl is pursued by a shadowy figure after an embarrassing incident.  Short, Thriller

ARC by Not Telling - The night shift at Heathrow's animal centre get some new guests.  Short, Thriller

Shuteye by Nubbins Sawyer - Noisy neighbors in the apartment above keep a man from getting a good night's sleep. If only he knew what was going on up there...  Short, Horror

First Born by Caustic Sauce - A man races to hospital to be at the birth of his first baby.  Short, Thriller

The Sensitive One by Fuzzy Dunlop - Driven to distraction, a man sets out to uncover the source of a mysterious sound only to find some noises are best ignored.  Short, Horror

Kidnapped by Billy Bob - A man finds himself blindfolded and tied up for reasons unknown.  Short, Thriller

Who Killed The Cat by I Don't Know - When the cat dies, somebody has to pay.  Short, Horror

The Sparkly Red Blouse by B Simmons - A young girl plays with her new dolls.  Short, Horror

Final Run by Written by - A quiet day in the park turns into a run for your life.  Short, Horror, Thriller

Swiped Away by No Name - A man digitally haunted for past sins.  Short, Horror

Inside Out by Also, no name - Sometimes you must obey the voice, no matter whose it is.  Short, Horror

Mr. Lamb by Bo Peep - A businessman searches for spirits in his Zoom meeting.  Short, Horror

Nothing To Fear by Also written by - A mother proves to her son the monster under his bed isn't real.  Short, Horror

Hitori by 16644000 - It was only Hitori.  Short, Sci Fi, Horror

So we have...

15 x Horror

8 x Thriller

3 x Sci Fi

26 Total

Awesome turnout. Gonna dive on in.

Starting from the top... let's do this!

Wow, how fast was that!

Stupendously fast turn-around. Awesome job!

When are votes due????

Quoted from eldave1 When are votes due????

Some opinions here from you all would be good.

The original idea was to drop the next challenge pretty well straight away but with this turnout I think that's not quite feasible or more to the point fair, considering the turnout of 26 is above what I envisaged. Great though!  

Input on how long would help. 24 hours?

They're fast reads, keeps comments brief - keep a tally of your feedback/scores, so you can get your votes in fast.

After Challenge 2 there will be a longer breather to Challenge 3, and hopefully I'll sync it up to the following weekend (not this weekend).Pending Don's approval of course.

I'd be happy with 24 hours.

I can totally do 24 hours.

...though you may want to send an email to every writer to let them know since many expect a week.

Maybe 48 hours? It would allow for people with day jobs to review more than just the minimum.

Quoted from JEStaats ...though you may want to send an email to every writer to let them know since many expect a week.

Yeah maybe we can take into account the read/review count. We don't want to be voting if some scripts have 5 reads and others have 15, just a thought.

Quoted from FrankM Maybe 48 hours? It would allow for people with day jobs to review more than just the minimum.

Yeah on second thought I think 48 at a minimum.

48 should be the min

Is that 24 hours just to read/vote or do notes also?

Just a reminder everyone of the genres allowed:

Genre: Horror, Thriller, SciFi

Quoted from MarkItZero Is that 24 hours just to read/vote or do notes also?

Just getting the general consensus at this point.

I've got to duck out now so will get back to you all on time, and consult with Don (and of course what you all think is manageable).

Quoted from LC Just a reminder everyone of the genres allowed: Genre: Horror, Thriller, SciFi

I knew this would come in handy  

Quoted Text This is what happens when it's a slow day at work...   Horror Speculative fiction which is intended to frighten, scare, or disgust. Thriller Fiction, having numerous, often overlapping subgenres. Thrillers are characterized and defined by the moods they elicit, giving viewers heightened feelings of suspense, excitement, surprise, anticipation and anxiety. Sci-Fi Speculative fiction that typically deals with imaginative and futuristic concepts such as advanced science and technology, space exploration, time travel, parallel universes, and extraterrestrial life. A Twist A plot twist is a literary technique that introduces a radical change in the direction or expected outcome of the plot in a work of fiction. A Shock A sudden strong unpleasant or upsetting feeling a shock of surprise. A Sting in the Tail If something, such as a story or joke, has a sting in the/its tail, it has a surprising or unpleasant part that only becomes clear at the end or an unexpected, typically unpleasant or problematic end to something. Preferably Low Ideally; if possible. Contained location, minimal characters. Aim for easy and cheap to produce with minimal SFX. https://www.wescreenplay.com/blog/how-to-write-contained-screenplay/

At least 48 please.

I'm good with 48.

48 is great and it rhymes.

Lots of people talking about a twist not being there, but there doesn't have to be a twist...

There are subtle differences between a twist, a shock and a sting in the tail, no?

A Twist

A plot twist is a literary technique that introduces a radical change in the direction or expected outcome of the plot in a work of fiction.

A Shock

A sudden strong unpleasant or upsetting feeling a shock of surprise.

A Sting in the Tail

If something, such as a story or joke, has a sting in the/its tail, it has a surprising or unpleasant part that only becomes clear at the end or an unexpected, typically unpleasant or problematic end to something.

Quoted from Warren Lots of people talking about a twist not being there, but there doesn't have to be a twist... There are subtle differences between a twist, a shock and a sting in the tail, no? A Twist A plot twist is a literary technique that introduces a radical change in the direction or expected outcome of the plot in a work of fiction. A Shock A sudden strong unpleasant or upsetting feeling a shock of surprise. A Sting in the Tail If something, such as a story or joke, has a sting in the/its tail, it has a surprising or unpleasant part that only becomes clear at the end or an unexpected, typically unpleasant or problematic end to something.

I noticed this as well. Even mention it earlier in this thread. Really hope readers don't give a script a poor rating just because it doesn't have a twist.

You're correct, Warren & Zack.

Overall, the story only needs to have an impact, leave a lasting impression, whether it be shock, sting, twist.

Quoted from Zack I noticed this as well. Even mention it earlier in this thread. Really hope readers don't give a script a poor rating just because it doesn't have a twist.

Seemed simple enough.

I'm using the word "twist" in my reviews but it encompasses all the things listed. If I say, "for me it didn't have a "twist""...that means for me it missed all 3...twist, shock or sting.  Just using the word twist.

Quoted from mmmarnie I'm using the word "twist" in my reviews but it encompasses all the things listed. If I say, "for me it didn't have a "twist""...that means for me it missed all 3...twist, shock or sting.  Just using the word twist.

Makes sense.

Quoted from mmmarnie I'm using the word "twist" in my reviews but it encompasses all the things listed. If I say, "for me it didn't have a "twist""...that means for me it missed all 3...twist, shock or sting.  Just using the word twist.

To me, a shock ending and/or a sting in the tail is the same thing as a twist or at least falls close to under the same category. The ending of "Seven" (what's in the box), the final scene of "Silence of the Lambs" (I'm having a friend for dinner), the jump scare at the end of first "Friday the 13th", the tape recording reveal in "Michael Clayton"... though some may considered "sting in the tail", some considered shock endings, there is a reveal of some sort, which, to me, is considered a twist.

48 hours plz! Mad busy at work and trying to read/review script in-between tasks.

Can we still score ones we've read even if we haven't commented?

Quite a few of the scripts I've read are very samey and I don't want to keep saying the same thing.

Quoted from spesh2k To me, a shock ending and/or a sting in the tail is the same thing as a twist or at least falls close to under the same category.

I feel like this is when someone says "my truth" but it's still not true

To you that may be the case, but the definitions are subtlety different, but still different, that means they aren't the same thing.

Quoted from MarkRenshaw 48 hours plz! Mad busy at work and trying to read/review script in-between tasks.

I think 48 was the general consensus.

A clock will likely appear when we're into the latter 24hr mark.

And it looks like the next challenge may well fall close to or over the weekend.
That's the plan at the moment anyway.

Quoted from Pleb Can we still score ones we've read even if we haven't commented?Quite a few of the scripts I've read are very samey and I don't want to keep saying the same thing.

Max, comment on at least 10, you'll be right.
You can score on any you have legitimately read.
Obviously don't score on those you haven't read.

Wow, a lot happens while I sleep.

Great turnout, I reckon I can bust out these reads this morning while I "work" from home  

Quoted from LC Max, comment on at least 10, you'll be right. You can score on any you have legitimately read. Obviously don't score on those you haven't read.

Roger that! That's what I thought/hoped would be the case.

I just hope there's not too many dark alley twisty turn scarers to go through.

Quoted from Warren I feel like this is when someone says "my truth" but it's still not true To you that may be the case, but the definitions are subtlety different, but still different, that means they aren't the same thing.

There are technically subtle differences imho.

I think we can all agree if someone met the brief, and from what I've read so far, everyone has at least attempted the shock, twist, sting in the tail, and is being fair with their reviews.

Quoted from LC There are technically subtle differences imho. I think we can all agree if someone met the brief, and from what I've read so far, everyone has at least attempted the shock, twist, sting in the tail, and is being fair with their reviews.

I think the vast majority definitely got there with one of the three. How affective the payoff was is a different story.

Quoted from Warren I feel like this is when someone says "my truth" but it's still not true To you that may be the case, but the definitions are subtlety different, but still different, that means they aren't the same thing.

Yeah, I get that not every movie/script is going to have some kind of M. Night Shamalyan twist or like the twist in Psycho. But IMO, it doesn't have to be some kind of blind-siding reveal to be a twist. Whatever you guys wanna call it, sting in the tail or shock ending, ultimately, something is going to be revealed, suggested or have some kind of payoff and it's going to surprise the audience in some way. I consider the ending of "The Mist" to be a twist, though "technically", according to these rules of what a twist is, I guess it would be both a sting in the tail and a shock ending combined. The end of "Seven" I guess would be a combination of all the above. A twist is made to surprise or shock, isn't it? I don't know. I'm just scoring this shit on how clever I thought the stories were. If I wasn't surprised by anything or shocked by anything, the script didn't accomplish its mission, regardless of how technical we want to get with what constitutes a twist ending.

Quoted from spesh2k Yeah, I get that not every movie/script is going to have some kind of M. Night Shamalyan twist or like the twist in Psycho. But IMO, it doesn't have to be some kind of blind-siding reveal to be a twist. Whatever you guys wanna call it, sting in the tail or shock ending, ultimately, something is going to be revealed, suggested or have some kind of payoff and it's going to surprise the audience in some way. I consider the ending of "The Mist" to be a twist, though "technically", according to these rules of what a twist is, I guess it would be both a sting in the tail and a shock ending combined. The end of "Seven" I guess would be a combination of all the above. A twist is made to surprise or shock, isn't it? I don't know. I'm just scoring this shit on how clever I thought the stories were. If I wasn't surprised by anything or shocked by anything, the script didn't accomplish its mission, regardless of how technical we want to get with what constitutes a twist ending.

Yeah fair call... No rules though, just definitions.

As with all these challenges the cream rises to the top

I've read about 15, will try and get through the rest tomorrow.

So far enjoyed them all, it's just as I found when reading all the flash horror stories a lot of them follow similar themes and twists. It is very hard to come up with something unique in 2 pages!

Done

Nice effort by all

One clearly stood out above the rest for me. Voted and in!

Read all of them last night, already sent my vote in.

There's some really good stuff here, though a big chunk of the scripts chose the same kinda twist with the pursuer becoming the victim. Didn't take off points for that though, though some did it better than others. There was one clear-cut winner for me and a few that were just a notch below.

Overall, good stuff.

-- Michael

My votes are in, I had two favourites this time around.

Hitori had my favourite plot, if only the execution was better it would have had top marks from me. Looking forward to seeing who wrote that one

Got through them all.

I found that, probably because I watch too many horror movies (I'm watching one right now) and was reading so many in a row, I got really negative about overused horror tropes. Like as soon as I read that someone was being chased or someone was being haunted, I immediately got way too negative. And I seldom am that way. Weird. I got to ease up on horror being "my thing".

Apologies to anyone I was mean to. Once all is revealed feel free to be super nasty to my script.

Just spent the past few hours reading, commenting and scoring the entries. Scores now submitted but that was hard going. Lot's of good stories but for me two excellent ones.
I have to admire how people managed to get some wonderful characters created and brought to life in a couple of days.
Kudos to everyone who managed to get a story in.

One definitely stood out above the rest, for me. Scoring was a lot more difficult than I thought for all the others. I think there'll be a lot of tie scores for second and third place.

Overall, very impressive first round everyone!

Okay... read, scored, submitted.

I feel like I'm on a completely different wavelength for this challenge. I couldn't pick a stand out, half off them follow the same formula and are completely indistinguishable from each other once you've read them all.

Sure there were ones I liked more than others, but that was only comparatively.

But most people seem to be loving a lot of the content, which is great of course, I just feel like I really missed the train on this one.

I have absolutely no idea which will end on top, I couldn't even pick a top 3. That's definitely a first for me in any OWC or challenge I've been in. My top picks will generally land in the top 3 in some or other order.

I think I agree with John in that sense, there will likely be very little separating these scripts.

So a bit of a fizzle round for me. Looking forward to the next.

When can we start guessing?

Quoted from Zack When can we start guessing?

No guessing yet, Cowboy!
I have no idea why I addressed you like that.

I'm half asleep.

Quoted from LC No guessing yet, Cowboy! I have no idea why I addressed you like that. I'm half asleep.

Because, deep down, you know I like to wrastle me some cattle!  

The boards are on fire... I think we need a 48hr cutoff more often

Quoted from Warren The boards are on fire... I think we need a 48hr cutoff more often

Agreed!

Quoted from Warren The boards are on fire... I think we need a 48hr cutoff more often

Be careful what you wish for.  

So, are the writers revealed after final votes are cast? Or are the writers revealed after the other two rounds of scripts?

I'm working my way through. Got plenty of time still based on that timer. Tomorrow should be a light day so I can get to them all.

Amazing turnout. And Don himself is giving notes on scripts!

Quoted from spesh2k So, are the writers revealed after final votes are cast? Or are the writers revealed after the other two rounds of scripts?

In the past, in other writer's tournament-type challenges, it's been at the end of each round.

Quoted from spesh2k So, are the writers revealed after final votes are cast? Or are the writers revealed after the other two rounds of scripts?

Delaying the reveals makes sense if we're expected to continue in the world created in the first round, but I doubt that's the structure.

Quoted from spesh2k So, are the writers revealed after final votes are cast? Or are the writers revealed after the other two rounds of scripts?

I've been tossing this one up. Along with revealing, or not, top scorers.
I'd like to see as many people as possible move on to the next rounds. After all, you might not peak in this round and go on to score highly in the next two.

What do you all think?

Quoted from FrankM Delaying the reveals makes sense if we're expected to continue in the world created in the first round, but I doubt that's the structure.

That's one for delay.

I think delay might be cool.
Bear in mind the next two challenges are not inter-related.

Quoted from LC I've been tossing this one up. Along with revealing, or not, top scorers. I'd like to see as many people as possible move on to the next rounds. After all, you might not peak in this round and go on to score highly in the next two. What do you all think?

I personally think it's more fun to know where you stand and what you need to bring to the next rounds if you want to be a contender.

I also think these tourney challenges are about endurance, they always lose some writers as they progress, if that's because people aren't happy where they stand I think that's just par for the course.

Either way though, I'm here for the duration

Quoted from LC I've been tossing this one up. Along with revealing, or not, top scorers. I'd like to see as many people as possible move on to the next rounds. After all, you might not peak in this round and go on to score highly in the next two. What do you all think?

Maybe Don can make one of those poll threads he does sometimes?

Quoted from MarkItZero ...Amazing turnout. And Don himself is giving notes on scripts!

Got Bert to make an appearance too.  

I think you should release the scores after every round. Lets me know how awful I'm doing.

Quoted from LC That's one for delay. I think delay might be cool. Bear in mind the next two challenges are not inter-related.

I wasn't trying to advocate for a delay, just stating the conditions under which one might make sense.

If the rounds are independent of each other, I'd rather know where I stand. My first round of a multi-round tourney tends to be a disaster anyway.

Quoted from FrankM I wasn't trying to advocate for a delay, just stating the conditions under which one might make sense.....

You're right. You didn't. I was like an overzealous news reporter there.
Carry on.
A decision will be made.

A delayed reveal of writers would drive me to drink.

Too late.

Yeah, not sure about a delay in reveals. But if those are the rules, those are the rules. I already rewrote mine and added an extra page and a half. Don't really want the sloppy two-paged version to be up for another month, I literally spent 15 minutes writing it and it's a mess. But if I need to wait it out, I can wait it out I suppose.

Quoted from spesh2k Yeah, not sure about a delay in reveals. But if those are the rules, those are the rules. I already rewrote mine and added an extra page and a half. Don't really want the sloppy two-paged version to be up for another month, I literally spent 15 minutes writing it and it's a mess. But if I need to wait it out, I can wait it out I suppose.

Oooh, I can relate to this. Sometimes you just want to get those changes out quick!

Maybe do something different with the scores and only reveal the top 5. That way everyone else is in the same boat and the same stakes, or so they think. Keep people at the bottom from giving up early.

Of course I have no idea how the three rounds are going to work, so maybe that's not feasible. But I'll be in that boat.

Quoted from ReneC Maybe do something different with the scores and only reveal the top 5. That way everyone else is in the same boat and the same stakes, or so they think. Keep people at the bottom from giving up early.

I kinda like this idea...

Quoted from ReneC Maybe do something different with the scores and only reveal the top 5. That way everyone else is in the same boat and the same stakes, or so they think. Keep people at the bottom from giving up early. Of course I have no idea how the three rounds are going to work, so maybe that's not feasible. But I'll be in that boat.

This is a good idea.

I've read them all.

Great challenge Libby and Don!

Quoted from ReneC Maybe do something different with the scores and only reveal the top 5. That way everyone else is in the same boat and the same stakes, or so they think. Keep people at the bottom from giving up early. Of course I have no idea how the three rounds are going to work, so maybe that's not feasible. But I'll be in that boat.

I second that !

Quoted from ReneC Maybe do something different with the scores and only reveal the top 5. That way everyone else is in the same boat and the same stakes, or so they think. Keep people at the bottom from giving up early. Of course I have no idea how the three rounds are going to work, so maybe that's not feasible. But I'll be in that boat.

I like this.

Well if you reveal as you go and know your score and where you stand I think it's fun to watch maybe someone pull up from behind...like a horse race.

Quoted from mmmarnie Well if you reveal as you go and know your score and where you stand I think it's fun to watch maybe someone pull up from behind...like a horse race.

That's a good point, too. Encourages competition.

Reviewed them all. Gave one 5. Looking forward to seeing who wrote what and hopefully being able to write one for next round. My work hours are crazy, barely got this round 1 in.

Quoted from mmmarnie Reviewed them all. Gave one 5. Looking forward to seeing who wrote what and hopefully being able to write one for next round. My work hours are crazy, barely got this round 1 in.

Marnie, do another to combat the 'peen fest' as Don calls it.Well, something like that...

If it helps any, it looks like (the way things are going) the next rounds will be into the weekend writing challenges.

Quoted from LC Marnie, do another to combat the 'peen fest' as Don calls it.Well, something like that... If it helps any, it looks like (the way things are going) the next rounds will be into the weekend writing challenges.

I figured the next round would be over the weekend which means I'm probably out. Life of a bartender.  

Do we have a set date/time when round 2 will drop?

My next two weekends are fairly busy, but I'm determined to carve out some time to write. Glad the reading isn't over a weekend, that'd be a hard thing to do for me.

Quoted from Warren Do we have a set date/time when round 2 will drop?

Still 23 hrs on that clock to read and get ballots in, so...